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The Brutality of Beauty

“Shoes “are almost becoming torture instruments. During a woman’s daily make-up ritual, on average she will expose herself to more than 200 synthetic chemicals before she has morning coffee. Regular lipstick wearers will ingest up to four and a half kilos during their lifetime.”

Sheila Jeffreys, “the Andrea Dworkin of the UK,” is back with a new book on misogyny and beauty — a more radical Beauty Myth, sort of.

I don’t agree with a lot of Jeffreys’ positions, and, like Dworkin, her work is often taken out of context and used as an anti-feminist tool. But I can appreciate her rage, her passion, and her fearlessness. And even if my version of feminism isn’t identical to hers, she presents challenging, thoughtful arguments (which are too often reduced to “angry” and “reactionary” by her detractors). As the article says:

Jeffreys can always be relied upon to back up her arguments by unearthing facts that are both disturbing and hard to believe. She cites one example of a porn actor who sold bits of her genitals to “fans” over the internet after a labiaplasty operation. She points to studies that have found significantly higher rates of suicide among women who have had breast implants. The latest, conducted in 2003 by the International Epidemiology Institute of Rockville and funded by Dow Corning Corp, a former maker of silicone gel breast implants, included a study of 2,166 women, some of whom received implants as long as 30 years ago. Dow Corning also funded an earlier Swedish study, which examined 3,521 women with implants, and found the suicide rate to be three times higher than normal.

There are other unwanted effects. Nipples can lose sensation and, in extreme cases, rot and fall off; stomach stapling can cause severe swelling in the pubic area; and liposuction can leave a patient in serious pain. A number of women have died after surgery, while others have been left in permanent discomfort.

Jeffreys argues that many male fashion designers are “projecting their misogyny on to the bodies of women”, and gives examples of collections featuring images based on sexual violence – Alexander McQueen’s show for his masters degree was entitled Jack The Ripper, and depicted bloodied images of Victorian prostitutes. A later show in 1995, Highland Rape, featured staggering, half-naked, brutalised models. And John Galliano, in his 2003 collection for Christian Dior, Hard Core Romance, used the imagery of sadomasochism, putting his models in seven-inch heels and rubber suits “so tight they had to use copious amounts of talcum powder to fit into them”.

I personally believe that feminism doesn’t have to be about denying everything that is either historically or stereotypically “feminine” and embracing all that has been deemed masculine — in fact, I think that there’s a deep level of sexism inherent in denying the virtue of “female” things, and positioning the masculine as always better. So the anti-makeup, anti-high heel version of feminism isn’t mine (although I certainly understand it, and don’t think that it’s wrong). But, I also realize that it’s intellectually lazy to simply embrace “feminine” things without critiquing the system that has institutionalized them — shouting “Girl Power!” and wearing pink nailpolish just doesn’t cut it, in my book, as a feminist act. For me, that’s where people like Jeffreys come in. I don’t agree with her all the way, but she points out hypocrisies and challenges the dominant school of thought. Read the whole article. And thanks to Melissa for the link.


45 thoughts on The Brutality of Beauty

  1. I agree with your sentiment that feminism need not be about eschewing all things “feminine” and I also agree that Jeffreys has made some good points. Obviously an art show depicting extreme violence against women has nothing to do with women being “beautiful” or “feminine”–it’s about women being meat, being product. And that’s what always galls me about advertising (let alone art). Men are facing this more and more with society’s fascination with washboard abs, lots of hair, and the ability to have a six hour erection. But they’re just joining a party that women have been involved in for decades…the commercialization of their very bodies.

  2. Women with breast implants are three times more likely to commit suicide? That seems to me like a pretty vague relationship. My guess would be that the eventual suicide has more to do with the reasons for getting implants in the first place (read: low self-esteem, degrading job, &c) than as a result of the implants themselves.

  3. Heliologue, I think you’re right, but I’m not sure anybody is arguing for the simple breast implant > suicide causation. I don’t think that works. Rather, like you said, either the variables that cause a woman to sergically alter herself in that way are indicative that she’s been or is subsceptibl to be damaged, or the event of the surgery brings with it things that make these women more vulnerable. It’s a complicated relationship, I’m sure, but well worth investigating.

    As one might expect, I bristled at the implication that there’s something patriarchal about the use of BDSM themes in fashion. But that, too, is too simple. There is room even within the BDSM community to examine why the stereotyped and highly stylized images of women (and to an extent men) as tops and bottoms are hot for us, and whether we have accepted archetypes for our community that we shouldn’t just adopt wholesale. Why are ballerina shoes and super-high heels hot for some of us? I’m not even criticizing, just saying that circling the wagons and refusing to undertake the inquiry is not fair.

    Then, I don’t know Jeffries’ work well, and it’s possible she hates all BDSM, in which case, hell with her.

  4. The alternative to feminine is not masculine. What about androgyny (choosing the best of both sexes)? What about rejection of artificiality or the capitalist beauty-market in favor of natural femininity? What about choosing feminine expressions from other cultures (rejecting those with adverse health or financial consequences)? What about defining a new standard of femininity? I think there are more alternatives here than just masculine vs traditional, market-defined femininity.

    I was shocked when I first heard that it is considered just proper grooming for a woman with grey hair to dye her hair, as a courtesy to others, supposedly. Ditto with plastic surgery to remove wrinkles. Why on earth should I owe it to others not to appear my own age?

    As an inherently lazy person, I have migrated away from grooming that: (a) costs money; (b) requires a large time investment; (c) requires upkeep; (d) produces no appreciable difference in the way others react to me; (e) has little or no aesthetic appeal or justification; (f) limiting of other things I may want to do, such as see, walk or sit. Male standards of grooming can be just as high maintenance as female, so I do not regard eschewing this stuff as “masculine.” I consider it common sense.

    Stuff that has fallen by the wayside: (a) nail polish; (b) eyebrow plucking; (c) shaving; (d) hair requiring anything beyond blow drying and a little product to keep it neat; (e) anything tight, binding, scratchy or restrictive of movement; (f) uncomfortable shoes with no traction or support; (g) make up; (h) anything smelly or greasy that goes on the skin, except aloe vera and anti-perspirant; (i) anything that requires dry cleaning; (j) jewelry, piercings, tattoos.

    All this makes life a lot easier, and perhaps healthier and safer. This doesn’t have to be just about sex or feminism. It can be about Quaker-style simplicity (“live simply so that others may simply live”) and opting out of consumerism. It can be about respecting your body enough not to deform it (short and long term). It can be about honoring substance over superficiality.

  5. Then, I don’t know Jeffries’ work well, and it’s possible she hates all BDSM, in which case, hell with her.

    Yes, she most certainly does. She considers all bdsm, whatever the genders of the people involved, like all cosmetic surgery, to be a symptom of a seriously screwed-up woman-hating culture.

    I’m trying to find a way to articulate the anti-porn-s/m-trans[-people, although humanizing terms aren’t usually used]-cosmetic-surgery position that doesn’t sound horribly judgmental. Because I do judge it, and find it severely lacking. I’ll see if any links to articles that articulate similar beliefs come to mind–check out the Off Our Back site archives. Maybe in the meantime posters who aren’t on the wrong side of Jeffrey’s lines will come up with more impartial comments.

  6. The alternative to feminine is not masculine. What about androgyny (choosing the best of both sexes)? What about rejection of artificiality or the capitalist beauty-market in favor of natural femininity? What about choosing feminine expressions from other cultures (rejecting those with adverse health or financial consequences)? What about defining a new standard of femininity? I think there are more alternatives here than just masculine vs traditional, market-defined femininity.

    “Androgyny” is like “bisexual”: because there’s only a shaky consensus as to what is and is not truly feminine or masculine, there’s no real consensus as to what constitutes true androgyny. Witness the debates over what constitutes butch or femme in the dyke community. Plus, look at your definition: stuff from both sexes, i.e., male/masculine and female/feminine. You’re partly agreeing with Lauren: don’t be feminine; reject some of femininity and replace it with masculinity.

    And “natural femininity” is sort of a contradiction in terms. “Natural” refers to what nature gives women–hairy legs, facial hair, long wild tangles on our heads. “Femininity” refers to something socially determined and maintained: hairless legs, hairless chins, smooth and shiny hair on female scalps. “Femininity” is hardly ever natural.

    “Feminine expressions from other cultures,” doesn’t seem like it would solve anything. Henna and kohl might be less damaging to skin and wallet than nail polish and red #40, but they’re still something women are expected to wear because they’re women. And there aren’t many cultures that have empowering standards of femininity: women’s garments are mostly constricting, women’s bodies are mostly tweaked, and women’s personalities are mostly rubbed out.

    And as far as a “new standard of femininity,” why? Why replace one oppressive standard with another, slightly less difficult but still necessarily dictatorial standard?

  7. I’m trying to find a way to articulate the anti-porn-s/m-trans[-people, although humanizing terms aren’t usually used]-cosmetic-surgery position that doesn’t sound horribly judgmental. Because I do judge it, and find it severely lacking.

    Piny, I’m with you, and I just refuse to debate the propriety of my own existence.

    Now, I really can see talking about porn differently — and I concede that as a feminist way too tolerant of porn for the taste of many feminists. Ultimately, I fear that giving a patriarchal state the power to regulate sexual speech is about guaranteed to backfire and only operate against the speech of sexual minorities. But it’s not like I have no time for feminists talking about the crap that is mainstream porn or how it impacts women.

    But the idea that merely by doing BDSM one is replicating a misogynist system — meritless and insulting, and the proponents of that view ought to be careful who they are chucking out of the tent. I’m willing to talk about how the BDSM community can be less patriarchal, but “stop being who you are” is just not on the table and never will be.

    Fortunately for the rest of feminism, Shiela Jeffries doesn’t get to decide on her own whether you or I can pursue feminist goals or even call ourselves feminists. And if she could, feminism would find itself with a lot fewer friends in a hurry.

  8. I have a thought here that I may not articulate very well–apologies in advance. (Something about being in an almost-empty office on a rainy Friday afternoon makes you feel like your brain has turned to mush.)

    Why is it that modifications to one’s body or hair or clothing are only problematic for women? Or for non-Western white people, for that matter? I mean, clearly, there is the issue of power, of women historically being told to look a certain way in order to please men. But I’m skeptical that being all “natural” is any less problematic. I mean, no one ever looks at men cutting their hair shorter than their collar or shaving as “inauthentic.” Or if a white teenager dyes his hair blue, it’s normal (relatively), but if an Asian woman dyes her hair blond, it’s (purely & only) a symptom of having a skewed sense of worth due to the history of colonization, etc.

    I’m not saying you can ignore power differentials in society and pretend that they don’t exist. But it still makes me uncomfortable to retreat to a view that the only way that women can be “unoppressed” is by not modifying themselves whatsoever–hairy legs, hairy armpits, no hair dye, no makeup, no skirts. Or that the only way someone can be authentically “black” is by sporting an Afro. And so on. So what, now only white Western men can have a culture? The rest of us have to revert to a primitive stage of being “natural”?

    Hmm. Sorry this is so jumbled… there’s something in there, and I just can’t quite put my finger on it. I think whether one is oppressed/not-oppressed by a particular modification has a lot more to do with one’s awareness of the power dynamics in society and your choices about what you do or don’t do vis-a-vis those in power. So a woman with bleached blond hair can either be completely unaware that she is fulfilling a patriarchal barbie-doll fantasy in order to please men–or she can be perfectly aware of the stereotype, and see her long blond hair + untraditional gender choices + kick-ass intellectualism as a way to fuck with people’s expectations and to demand the world deal with both her mind and her sexuality (rather than insist that women can be smart/successful or they can be sexual, but never both at once).

    Meh. Maybe someone can clarify what it is I’m grasping at here. Anyone?

  9. I never have liked make up, high heels were often avoided because they made me taller than most of the men I knew which for some was an issue. Perhaps it was my own fault for saying things like “how’s the weather down there?” lol.

    I have until recently done the gray hair battle, because seeing all those gray hairs taking over at age 45 made me feel old, so I dyed mine to make myself feel better.

    I might again but at this point I have decided the gray hairs have won. They are really a pretty silvery color so when they fully take over it might look pretty awesome.

    I hate bras, don’t wear them unless it’s something I really have to wear one with which is not very often for that specific reason. Thankfully I am not overly endowed where I have to worry about it. To me they are a form of torture that I can not wait to be released from.

    I don’t worry about am I feminine or not. I guess my point to this ramble is I’m not considered by most to be a strong feminist, I don’t think those of you, like Lauren as an example, she is more active and aware of feminist issues than I am, her desire to please herself by wearing make up or whatever makes her feel happy doesn’t make her less of a feminist. So while I understand some of what Shiela Jeffries is saying, the lack of lipstick does not a feminist make.

    🙂

  10. Weirdly, the more feminist I get in my thinking, the more I tend to be attracted to heels and make-up. Certainly not all the time. But when I get dressed to go out, I aim for “pretty”. In my own way, but certainly girly. I don’t think there’s a contradiction, so long as it’s taken in the spirit of fun and not pushed on you as a requirement to survive.

  11. >>Why is it that modifications to one’s body or hair or clothing are only problematic for women?>>

    I think that men are less criticized both because of sexism and, uh, because of the results of sexism. It’s true that masculinity is seen as the default, but it’s also true that men aren’t expected to do anywhere near as much as women are to alter their appearance from nature. We don’t have to dress up as much, we don’t have to wear as many accessories, our “nice” clothes are more comfortable, and our “casual” clothes can look much worse. Our shoes never hurt our feet. We aren’t expected to wear makeup at all, and I don’t think most men contemplate plastic surgery in middle age. We can shave our heads if hair is too much trouble, and we don’t have to shave anywhere else. The amount of fashion-related time and trouble that has gone out of my life is huge–I can roll out of bed and be ready for my office job in ten minutes. So we aren’t natural, but we take fewer pains.

    Also, the burden of appearance that women have to bear isn’t just related to being attractive to men–they also have to differentiate themselves from men, so that no one gets confused about who’s privileged and who isn’t. Forcing second-class citizens to visibly segregate themselves is a time-honored tradition all over the world, from sumptuary laws restricting cloth by class to red hats for prostitutes to yellow stars. Someone has to make the system easy to navigate, and, as always, women are ordered to do the work.

    So when we talk about sexist standards of dress and appearance, we tend to talk about women simply because those laws have been laid down on their bodies.

    (Man, did that ever sound bad. This is not to say that anything related to “feminine” is a patriarchal sellout, etc., simply that the system of forcing women to dress “like women” has a great deal to do with making sure everyone knows just who the women are.)

  12. AB, I didn’t think what you wrote was garbled. I thought it made prefect sense.

    So what, now only white Western men can have a culture? The rest of us have to revert to a primitive stage of being “natural”?

    I get it. Since cro magnon times, we’ve been decorating ourselves for our own reasons. If everything a minority or less powerful group does is derided as either an emulation or reaction to the dominant culture, then there is no culture other than the dominant one, and everything else is merely derivative or reactive and might as well be left at the curb.

    Imagine applying that to music. Because gospel and jazz and blues were created in reaction to a lorger oppressive culture, playing them merely replicates the oppression. Because hip hop was created in reaction to oppression, playing it replicates the oppression. Because rock and punk were created by youth cultures reacting to the constraints of the dominant culture, playing them merely replicates the dominant culture. Pretty soon we’re left with the music of dead white christian males, and pre-Columbian folk-forms.

    There’s something to that criticism. I don’t think we ought to blithely nod our heads at the powerful way appearance norms get crammed onto women. But I do think it goes waaaay too far to say that everything that responds to the larger culture is so tainted by patriarchy that it must be chucked. We have to hold open the possibility that women can decide for themselves what it beautiful, and maybe not all at once by over time, these norms will become essentially independent of patriarchal constraints.

    Waiting for the abolition of gender before women can figure out what to wear sounds like a poor strategy.

    BTW, anyone who hasn’t followed the link to the whole Guardian piece should do so. I’m always skeptical of the way the MSM treats the ideas of radical feminists, because Dworkin didn’t believe what she was often accused of advocating, but … wow. If they’re even half accurate, just, wow.

  13. If everything a minority or less powerful group does is derided as either an emulation or reaction to the dominant culture, then there is no culture other than the dominant one, and everything else is merely derivative or reactive and might as well be left at the curb.

    Ah, that’s exactly what I meant. Much more concise, though. The truth is a bit more complicated and nuanced than either “All things women do to modify themselves are inherently foreign (ie, from the patriarchy), oppressive, and thus wrong” and “True feminism means women can do whatever they want! Whee!” (As if free will and choice somehow comes from somewhere outside the patriarchal culture we all live and breathe every day. Maybe the Martians gave it to us.)

    Perhaps not totally on topic, I was just struck with the thought as I was reading the comments.

  14. men aren’t expected to do anywhere near as much as women are to alter their appearance from nature. We don’t have to dress up as much, we don’t have to wear as many accessories, our “nice” clothes are more comfortable, and our “casual” clothes can look much worse.

    Yah, I’m not so sure I agree with this, Piny. In 90-degree muggy weather, I sure think a loose skirt and cotton sleeveless shirt is much more comfortable than a collared shirt and khakis. And most men still have to drag a metal blade across their face every morning, right? That’s not particularly “better” in my book than having to shave my legs once in while when I feel like wearing a skirt. (I know some men can choose to grow a beard, but I submit that there are a lot of men for whom a straggly beard would be considered much more unprofessional than a woman not wearing makeup.)

    I think women have pressure to do more extreme things to their bodies to win the “carrot” of patriarchal approval (plastic surgery, anyone?). But I’m definitely not convinced that you can argue men do less body modification unless you’re coming at it from a very male-centric viewpoint (because it seems so natural that it doesn’t really register as body modification anymore).

  15. “All things women do to modify themselves are inherently foreign (ie, from the patriarchy), oppressive, and thus wrong”

    This assertion, unsurprisingly enough, is my biggest problem with Jeffreys.

    But I’m not sure that this is exactly what’s being discussed wrt women and how they’re supposed to dress:

    If everything a minority or less powerful group does is derided as either an emulation or reaction to the dominant culture, then there is no culture other than the dominant one, and everything else is merely derivative or reactive and might as well be left at the curb.

    If I read Jeffreys right, the idea isn’t that women have constructed their own minority culture–insular, discrete–in response to masculinity, but that they have been given a very specific place in a larger cultural system that includes “male” and “female.” IOW, women are not exercising agency, even reactive agency. They’re obeying the creative decisions of others.

    I have seen this kind of reasoning applied to butch/femme dyke culture: it’s an ostensibly reactive, actually derivative response to male/female gender rules. And I’m sure it would be true of any woman’s attempt at expressing rejection–because she’s still referencing a binary system, she can’t help but operate within it even as she criticizes it.

    …Which is where I start to disagree.

  16. Imagine applying that to music. Because gospel and jazz and blues were created in reaction to a lorger oppressive culture, playing them merely replicates the oppression. Because hip hop was created in reaction to oppression, playing it replicates the oppression. Because rock and punk were created by youth cultures reacting to the constraints of the dominant culture, playing them merely replicates the dominant culture.

    I’m reasonably girly, but this comparison strikes me as really false. I didn’t start shaving my legs as a rebellion against the constraints of the dominant culture. The demand that I shave my legs *was* one of the constraints of the dominant culture. I don’t mind shaving my legs: I’ve been doing it for ages, and it’s part of my routine now. But it’s really not hip-hop or punk. It’s not oppositional or a tool of liberation. It’s just something I do because I find my unmodified body ugly and gross.

  17. Yah, I’m not so sure I agree with this, Piny. In 90-degree muggy weather, I sure think a loose skirt and cotton sleeveless shirt is much more comfortable than a collared shirt and khakis. And most men still have to drag a metal blade across their face every morning, right? That’s not particularly “better” in my book than having to shave my legs once in while when I feel like wearing a skirt. (I know some men can choose to grow a beard, but I submit that there are a lot of men for whom a straggly beard would be considered much more unprofessional than a woman not wearing makeup.)

    (Shrug) I’m sure a lot of this is in the eye of the wearer. I’d much rather wear khakis on a hot day than a pair of pantyhose, and I’d rather wear a shirt with a collar and sleeves than be expected to shave my armpits. I find shaving my face to be much easier and much less time-consuming than either shaving my legs or putting on any makeup. It’s included in the ten-minute prep time. Plus, most men can grow beards and be acceptable; I don’t think women can ever show unshaven legs, and I don’t see very many women in my office who aren’t wearing any makeup. And women aren’t always able to wear slacks, sleeveless shirts, or ankle-length skirts to the office, although most offices have no problem with any of them. There’s also the question of accessories, jewelry, undergarments, shoes, haircare, expense, and so on.

    What other things can you think of as uncomfortable or time-consuming that men are forced to do, aside from shaving and (sometimes) covering more skin? I’ve heard men talk about neckties, but not much else.

  18. A bit off-topic, but the sheer amount of effort women put into their appearance reminded me of a comment that I’ve been mulling around during the victim-blaming when a rape happens wars. Neil the Ethical Werewolf wrote a post criticizing men who get all huffy and say women deserve abuse for dressing sexy–he was like, What? Does it hurt you to see pretty women and you’re getting revenge? (Not in those words, but that was the general gist.) He said that women dress up to please men, and then some men punish women for it.

    I think that some of the more sadistic fashion designers are doing this. Not all, but the ones who like clothes that are exceedingly painful or who delight in images of violence against women. (Not the BDSM stuff, but the violent stuff.) And, I would add, the men most likely to want to punish women for being attractive often are the first to criticize women for not trying hard enough to please.

    My guess is it’s guilt. They demand their entitlements, know that it’s wrong on a certain level, and then project their guilt onto women.

    One thing that’s made it easier for me to delight in feminine things is that I am with a man who doesn’t care if I ever wave a masacra brush again and would never, ever, presume he’s entitled to tell me how to dress or look. I am really free to do what I like, so no need to rebel or conform, just do what I like. And I think that if the pressure came off to strictly gender our clothes, you’d see a funny shakeout of people choosing to be femme-y and people choosing not–and not always the people you’d expect.

  19. My guess is it’s guilt. They demand their entitlements, know that it’s wrong on a certain level, and then project their guilt onto women.

    That makes a lot of sense.

    Or maybe it’s just a terrifying understanding that women are actually in control of their own bodies. The pressure is horrible, but you do still get to choose (in most situations) whether you wear makeup or bear children or undergo cosmetic surgery. And lots of women–more women than can be ignored–refuse all three. And even the ones who do seem to submit might actually be doing it for their own reasons. So if you’re a misogynist asshole who believes that women should look and act in such a way as to please you, then the mere fact of choice on any level would make you suspicious of any woman, whatever she actually does with her body.

  20. Sally, my examples were all or reactive rather than emulative behavior because the argument that the latter is not really free will is so obvious. AB was saying that too broad a criticism of women’s appearance ends up as saying women cannot have their own culture. If all leg-shaving and skirt-wearing is merely following the patriarchy’s dictates, and all refusal to do so other than leaving things natural is countercultural response to patriarchy, then women can only “truly” be free by eschewing any appearanc culture of their own, and I don’t think that’s a fair expectation.

  21. Amanda,

    Weirdly, the more feminist I get in my thinking, the more I tend to be attracted to heels and make-up. Certainly not all the time. But when I get dressed to go out, I aim for “pretty”. In my own way, but certainly girly. I don’t think there’s a contradiction, so long as it’s taken in the spirit of fun and not pushed on you as a requirement to survive.

    Me too. I like makeup but have no problems going without. I also like skirts and heels, a habit that developed after going through a particularly frustrating battle with finding a decent pair of pants. This year, I have found an awesome pair of pants and am begninning to get commentary from friends on whether or not I actually wash them or even sleep in them. If I could get away with wearing a towel around my waist in public I would, but for now I prefer skirts long enough to allow me to sit on the floor or with my legs open. Pants are a bitch.

    I was thrilled last season when the 1950s Stepford style was in fashion, in part because although I like to look girlish I also don’t like putting skin on display. This is where my penchant for vintage clothes come from — they fit my body way better than current cuts. And to my mother’s chagrin, I have yet to find a piece of clothing so sacred that I won’t take scissors to it. I see my style as a feminist drag, a reinterpretation of femininity.

    I went through a change as a teenager when I stopped wearing the punk rock gear as I realized I wasn’t being taken seriously by my elders. I changed the clothes but stayed the same on the inside; unfortunately I didn’t realize that I should have taken it a step further and begun to dress and present myself as pure, unadulterated me.

    All this is to say that while I enjoy certain aspects of beauty culture I am not ruled by them. Several years ago I could not have said this. Once I learned to let go of others’ expectations, stopped with the unhealthy diet/workout routine, got my big fatty tattoo, and finally got the Bettie haircut I always wanted, I realized that my outer shell doesn’t matter so much. I have my days, but whatever. I’m happier with my appearance today than I have ever been and I wouldn’t trade that for the size 4 jeans that I used to obsess over. No way, no how.

  22. It’s not oppositional or a tool of liberation. It’s just something I do because I find my unmodified body ugly and gross.

    Sally–I know this may be a reason that many (hell, maybe most) women shave their legs. But what I’m asking, I suppose, is whether it’s possible for women to modify their appearance for other reasons–or is any modification automatically coming from an oppressive place? I don’t shave my legs often–but sometimes I do, and for me it has a lot more to do with how sexy smooth, lotioned skin is. (Oh man, the one time I convinced my boyfriend to shave his legs, and I did also, we laid in bed together and just touched skin–yeow!) Is reclamation of a practice possible, regardless of its origins?

    Or can women mod their bodies in other ways that have not traditionally been considered “feminine”–say body piercings, like a nose ring? It’s jewelry, but I have a hard time seeing that as anything that is done to please men. (Well, probably because I pierced my nose with a *huge* hoop in college as part of a process to re-claim my sense of my own subjectivity in my body. I loved how it made the middle-aged men who used to whistle instead wince when they caught sight of it.)

    I could probably write a novel about body piercings and tattoos as one site where I think body modifications can be profoundly liberating. But here’s the thing: what seems very liberating for one woman can seem terribly oppressive to another. What I’m trying to work through in my mind is, does it matter how you see it yourself? Or does oppression come from how the wider society perceives it, regardless of your intentions?

  23. This is really about conformity and satisfying socio-cultural ideals of professional, attractiveness, and so forth.

    Once you get beyond a minimum level of personal hygiene it is to one degree or another about kissing society’s butt or some sub-culture in it.

  24. Okay, J Swift. But who creates those socio-cultural ideals? Are we saying that only Western white men do? Or can other kids play, too?

  25. But what I’m asking, I suppose, is whether it’s possible for women to modify their appearance for other reasons–or is any modification automatically coming from an oppressive place?

    Sure, I think it’s possible. It’s just not always clear to me when I’m doing it for self-expression purposes and when I’m doing it because I’ve been programmed since birth to think I’m supposed to look a certain way. And I think my first impulse is to dismiss critiques of beauty culture, because I lik mascara and don’t like having hairy legs, and I don’t want to think about it too much. I really don’t want to come to the conclusion that shaving is a tool of patriarchal oppression, because I prefer to shave. So instead I tell myself that I do it because I like to do it, even though that’s a bit facile.

    Sally, my examples were all or reactive rather than emulative behavior because the argument that the latter is not really free will is so obvious.

    Your analogies didn’t make it at all clear that it was “obvious.” Or at least, they make it sound like you don’t think it’s important.

  26. Once you get beyond a minimum level of personal hygiene it is to one degree or another about kissing society’s butt or some sub-culture in it.

    Let’s set aside for the moment the fact that “a minimum level of personal hygiene” involves as many cultural judgments as the standards you think are ass-macking. For example: What’s cleanliness? What’s filth? What’s healthy? What’s unsanitary? What’s offends those around you? What does taking care of your skin require? Your hair? Your teeth?

    So, as long as I don’t smell real bad, we can safely assume that I’m a conformist? I think that AB’s question is a little like this: Why does every choice have to be an acquiescent response either to culture or subculture?

  27. Mmm, licking mascara. I like it. Let’s start that one as a new, non-patriarchal tradition, whaddya say?

    Piny–I agree, it is probably in the eye of the beholder whether women or men have to do more intensive/more uncomfortable stuff to meet the minimum level of acceptability to go into the office. I suppose I’m suspicious of the argument that “of course, men have it easier” because I think it plays into what Lauren wrote in her original entry:

    I think that there’s a deep level of sexism inherent in denying the virtue of “female” things, and positioning the masculine as always better.

    My boyfriend (oh god, I swear I’m really not that person that can’t shut up about the person they date. He just happens to provide a lot of useful examples in this subject) dressed in skirts and had long hair for about 2 years in middle school. A testament to being raised by seriously, seriously progressive feminist parents. And he’s the one who frequently gets jealous of me in the summer, regarding the cooler clothes I can wear on the Metro that are still OK for work; the lack of razor burn I have to put up with, because my leg skin isn’t as sensitive as his face skin; how I can just not deal with cutting my hair and throw it up in a ponytail for six months, while he has to shave his head every couple of weeks.

    Some women feel the need to put a lot more work into being “presentable” than your average man. But I don’t think it follows that every woman does–because it seems a bit like saying that men’s way of being “presentable” is better than women’s, so truly liberated women strive to be like men.

    Which is clearly not what you were implying; I just wanted to let you know why I felt the need to disagree.

  28. My boyfriend (oh god, I swear I’m really not that person that can’t shut up about the person they date. He just happens to provide a lot of useful examples in this subject) dressed in skirts and had long hair for about 2 years in middle school.

    Heh. Good for him.

    You know, this might be more individual on my part than I want to admit–I feel a lot less pressure to conform to this standard than I ever felt to conform to the feminine one. t was more difficult for me to trend down to a minimum of effort than it is now, and much more difficult for me to figure out what that minimum was. That may be because there’s more to deal with from an objective standpoint, either in my life or in many women’s, or it may be because of dysphoria.

    And most of the time I’ve heard complaints about what guys have to do to dress up, it’s in very PHMT terms that make unfair comparisons, frequently during discussions specifically about health hazards: high heels/neckties, for example. Or plastic surgery/neckties.

    Some women feel the need to put a lot more work into being “presentable” than your average man. But I don’t think it follows that every woman does–because it seems a bit like saying that men’s way of being “presentable” is better than women’s, so truly liberated women strive to be like men.

    And I understand the distinction, too. I hadn’t noticed this double standard of normal in terms of progressive-professional, but I have definitely noticed it in terms of attractive, powerful, and easy.

  29. I can’t say always if it’s “just” social pressure or not. I think I look nice dressed a certain way, but I didn’t decide that in a vaccum. But that doesn’t mean that I am obliged to buck it if it makes me really unhappy. But it does oblige me to think about it very seriously, which results, I think in slowly easing yourself into a position where you are making decisions for their own sake.

  30. ‘rubber suits “so tight they had to use copious amounts of talcum powder to fit into them”.’

    Um, I’ve worn rubber clothes (for clubwear and fetish shows) and you pretty much have to wear powder or silicone spray to wear them if they show your figure at all. And that’s kind of the point, to show your figure…

    If you’re playing in the latex-fetish scene, you’re largely stepping out of the general political discussion – you’ve made your point already in one direction or another.

  31. I’m fairly feminine in my personal appearance, but I absolutely refuse to wear, or do, anything painful or uncomfortable, or which I know to be bad for me. I would never wear painful shoes, wax my body, or fry my skin, for example. This is my way of resisting. But, I think feminists need work harder to redefine and re-appropriate beauty. Beauty should be about self-discovery and self-exploration for women. Every woman should be able to define her beauty for herself. I do not wear make-up because I have low self-esteem, or want to impress women, or men, when I wear make up, its about exploring the possibilities of my personal appearance, its about fun, and colour. I don’t always wear it! Radical feminists have not offered women enough possibilities for redefining feminity and beauty in empowering ways. Feminists such as Jeffreys, seem to take on a “masculine” appearance. That’s absolutely fine if it’s empowering for them, but you can’t go about claiming this to be empowering for all women. I rather like butch women myself. But why should we have to adhere to a basically masculine ideal if we refuse to be oppressed by patriarchal constructions of femininity?

  32. We all have to take the time to think about how our outside matches our inside. Are we the ones making these decisions? Or are these decisions being made for us? I like to think that I make all the calls regarding how I look to the rest of the world – but sometimes I wonder how much of it is really me.

    Anyway, on the topic of surgery, I absolutely hate it when I see women on plastic-surgery shows saying that they are “doing it for themselves” or ” doing it because it makes ME happy.” Then, three scenes and a commercial break later, they are swollen and bruised on a hospital bed, crying in pain from an elective surgery. I wonder if any of them regret it, but they don’t think they can say it on camera.

    I’m not sure about the lipstick or the dresses – those are temporary changes – but I am on board with Jeffreys regarding plastic surgeries or anything that alters one’s life in the long-term (like an over-the-top diet/workout program). The results of surgeries are permanent. The pain might be permanent. Perhaps we can gauge which changes are okay depending on how long they last. For example, you can change from skirt to pants depending on your mood, but you sure can’t change your chest size depending on your mood!

  33. If a man doesn’t shave, he’s assumed to be lazy; if a women doesn’t shave, she’s assumed to be a radical feminist, or a lesbian.

    I have nothing against women who like getting dressed up and looking spiffy, but as an incredibly lazy person–no makeup, no blow-drying, no shaving unless I’m wearing skirts/shorts, which I don’t do that often–I must admit that I’d like to have it be assumed that I’m just lazy, instead of having it be assumed that I think men are evil.

  34. hey pepper

    i bet when/if they do say they regret it, it get edited out. since those shows are just big ads for plastic surgery, anyway…

  35. oh wait. i also wanted to add that when i don’t shave, i don’t want people to assume i’m just lazy. i don’t want them to assume anything at all,but the reasons i haven’t shaved have ranged from just not giving a shit to actively protesting/rebelling against what seemed to me to be a beauty mandate. i went two years without shaving until i got to the point where i could feel like doing it is a choice i’m making. so now, sometimes i do,sometimes i don’t.

  36. alley rat, quite right! with all the whiz-bang editing that goes on, of course they would take that out. it’s all surgical cheerleading, anyhoo. rah, rah rhinoplasty!

    i can’t make any kind of statement with leg shaving. my leg hair is too pale. if i decide that i want to let it grow, no one even notices.

  37. If a man doesn’t shave, he’s assumed to be lazy; if a women doesn’t shave, she’s assumed to be a radical feminist, or a lesbian.

    Actually, if a man doesn’t shave, sometimes people assume he’s a writer, an environmentalist, a communist, or a UNIX geek.

  38. I’m sorry Jill, so I take my comment and change it to being Jill that is more feminist than I am and end it with the same lack of lipstick alone does not a feminist make.

    🙂

  39. Pepper:
    I absolutely hate it when I see women on plastic-surgery shows saying that they are “doing it for themselves” or ” doing it because it makes ME happy.” Then, three scenes and a commercial break later, they are swollen and bruised on a hospital bed, crying in pain from an elective surgery. I wonder if any of them regret it, but they don’t think they can say it on camera.

    Just because it (temporarily) hurts doesn’t mean they’ve changed their minds. I both lift weights, bike, and do krav maga; just because at at fourtyfour minutes and fiftynine seconds on the bike I’m ready to say the whole thing sucks and I’m never going to do it again doesn’t mean that I’m not overall happy with exercise; I just happen to temporarily feel like shit.

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  41. On this topic I feel a tension that I don’t see expressed, so I thought I’d add it.

    Most people here seem to be saying some variation of “I do what I feel like, and if people can’t handle it, that’s tough.” Which I guess also translates to “people should do what they feel like, and that’s fine by me.” The implicit statement seems to be that being antifeminist or trapped in femininity means doing what other people want you to do, not what you authentically want. Whether that is make-up or plastic surgery isn’t really relevant.

    Lots of critiques have been launched at the idea of “authentic wanting,” dating from old Sigmund, but what I experience is not doing what I want because people want me to do it. If we lived in the Feminist Utopia, I would probably dress/comport myself much more femininely than I usually do, but the fact is that I cannot bear how it changes how people relate to me, and how those relations change the way I relate to myself. The cost is just too high. Much higher than any social sanction that being less feminine (but still legibly female and feminine) would mean.

    Am I the only one who feels this way?

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