In defense of the sanctimonious women's studies set || First feminist blog on the internet

Baseball Flame

Lauren

Have I ever mentioned that I played softball? For like ten years? Because it was a huge part of my childhood and one of the reasons feminism came so easily to me. Spend all your free time in a team sport while Growing Up Girl and tell me that feminism won’t come easily to you, being around all your capable peers, seeing them make decisions on the fly, depending on one another for a group goal. Like many folks who play sports during their primary and secondary school years, team sports has given way to a rotating routine of half-hearted gym time or a completely sedentary existence.

Anyway, after a fifteen year hiatus from most things baseball, I started watching the 2009 World Series. While I’ve enjoyed the season so far — and discovered I have a soft spot in my heart for Pedro Martinez — I am reminded why I don’t watch professional sports anymore.

1) Instant replay is so meta it sucks the fun out of spectatorship. All the state of the art technologies diagramming the speed and trajectory of a pitch, or replays that contradict the ump’s call, for example, take the debate out of the game. In one of the early games a runner slid into home plate and was declared safe by the umpire in a call that by all means appeared a solid call to anyone else watching in real-time, BUT with the magical effects of Instant! Replay! it was discovered that not only was the player out, he never actually touched home plate at all. Cue the next fifteen minutes of commentary on whether umpires should be murdered or simply relieved of their duties.

2) When someone is at bat and they split the TV screen so you can see the batter on one side and the catcher on the other, they put up a little box in the middle with a closeup of the catcher calling the pitch. Except they call the pitch in between their legs right at the crotch, so with the angle it looks like the catcher is masturbating himself. It’s porn-y. I’m all, “You. You and the pitcher. You’re on national television. Get a room.”

3) When teams like the Yankees buy all their talent, it takes the heart out of the game for fans who appreciate the  teamwork and training needed to achieve a mutually shared goal like winning a national title. Where’s the art in buying your team?

21 thoughts on Baseball Flame

  1. Baseball is one of those sports that seems much more fun to play than it is to watch, though I guess that argument could be made about any sport.

    On an offtopic note… this should be the Feministe mobile site! Navigation and layout on an iPod/iPhone is great. I don’t know if this is a side effect of using WordPress, but the main site tends to bog down in strange ways while loading on this dinky little thing, so it’s been wonderful to see this while the main site is dealt with.

  2. Agreed! Especially with the part about the Yankees buying up all the talent. I may be one of those elistist New Yorkers, but I cannot stand the Yankees. Especially Jeter.

    Are they winning, though? Because I hear people outside cheering.

  3. Except they call the pitch in between their legs right at the crotch, so with the angle it looks like the catcher is masturbating himself. It’s porn-y. I’m all, “You. You and the pitcher. You’re on national television. Get a room.”

    LOL!! And here I was, thinking I was the only one who noticed that, and just chalked it up to my dirty mind. You’re tellin’ on yourself here, Lauren!

  5. Ditto on the soft spot for Pedro Martinez and animosity towards the Yankees. I am a Mets fan, so I’d rather the Yankees win than the Phillies. But I love Pedro. I met him a few years ago when he was on the Mets, and he was so nice. He was so happy to play for them and at Shea of all places.

    And Tim McCarver and Joe Buck are awful. They really do suck. I know what play you’re talking about. I don’t even listen to them talk, because they’re just so stupid. As far as I know, they’re the only two commentators who make that big of a deal of bad calls.

  6. The new Us Weekly reports that Kate Hudson has been trying to make New York Yankee Alex Rodriguez less of an egomaniac.

    We are talking about a man WHO TRADEMARKED HIS NICKNAME. (Yes, I do feel better now.)

    Except they call the pitch in between their legs right at the crotch, so with the angle it looks like the catcher is masturbating himself. It’s porn-y.

    I feel this way about all shots of the center in football: let me crouch down with my spandex covered ass in the air, but a ball between my legs, and fling my arms around so it looks like I’m doing a crotch grab.

    My father (who’s not a US citizen and still owns a cricket bat) loves the Yankees, so I have a soft spot for them. My dad’s a very reserved, British sort, and the Yankees are one of the few things he gets agitated about. It’s comical.

  7. People seriously need to stop referring to professional franchises with the pronoun “we.” Saying something like, “We did a great job hitting,” is only acceptable if you’re either on the team, or it’s a college team and you’re a student or alum of said institution.

  8. @Lance

    Why? I’ve never understood this complaint. Basically the whole thing behind sports is to give people an outlet for tribal instincts (or something like that, according to me), so saying “we” fits in there pretty damn well. Second, teams are viewed historically, not just in the context of the players on the field. Teams have their historical record, and who is more a part of that, the 100 million dollar free agent who is in the first year of his contract, or the fan who has been there his whole life? Finally, that allowance for students of a college makes no sense. What would the difference between that and a resident of the city/region?

    Oh, and seriously, I hate the Yankees. I’ve decided that when I have kids, I don’t care how different they are from me, as long as they are a BoSox fan.

  9. with the angle it looks like the catcher is masturbating himself.

    Um. I’ve, uh…That’s what a man masturbating looks like? Have I been doing it wrong?

  11. i also can’t stand Steinbrenner’s Evil Empire, and was rooting for Philly since they are my favorite National League team. My fave MLB team overall is the Detroit Tigers, who blew many chances to make the playoffs this season.

    Even more than the Tigers and Phillies, i LOVE the U of Michigan Wolverines women’s fast pitch softball team!!!!! They are a perennial power in the Big Ten and Midwest more generally, and are still the only northern team to ever win a softball National Championship, having done so in 2005. Their coach, Carol Hutchins, is in my opinion the best coach Michigan has ever had in any varsity sport. Yes, even better than the legendary Bo Schembechler.

  13. So it’s not Yankee hate, but I totally agree with your point about girls’ sports helping pave the way to feminism. Plus it helps give good comebacks for taunts of someone throwing like a girl 😉

  14. Also, I disapprove of that avatar. It is unserious.

    Auguste, it’s been cracking me up a little these past few days to see Very Serious (or cranky) Comments next to avatars like yours or Lady Vanessa’s

  16. re: the “throwing like a girl” thing…i have a Michigan softball shirt that has an illustration of a fast pitch pitcher on the back, with the slogan “You WISH you could throw like a GIRL!!!” When i saw it, i knew i just had to get one!!!

  17. i had no idea we could choose our avatars…can we??? i figured that one was just assigned to me, i don’t recall ever choosing one.

  18. I have to disagree with you about instant replays. The refs have made some seriously bad calls this series, and if instant replays can be used in basketball just fine, why not baseball?
    I too despise the yankees for buying all of their talent. And the parade in the financial district, priceless. overpaid men being paraded around the temple of excess!

  19. ALL MLB teams buy their talent. Not one of the ballplayers play for free, just as IBM, Coca-Cola, AT&T and Wal-Mart buys their “talent.” It’s called the free market system. However in the case of Baseball, having no salary cap, Teams are allowed to pay what the market will bring to secure the best players. A teams total payroll, however, is capped and those teams who can afford to spend must pay a “Tax” to the smaller Market teams, so that they can increase their payrolls as well. This is why many small market teams, like the Tampa Rays, can hold on to their best players and advance to the World Series. Some owners take that money and put it into their pockets instead of investing it onto their team. That is their choice, as this is a (semi) free market system.
    As a Baseball Umpire, I too, am bothered by all the replays and camera angles pointing out any mistakes in judgment calls. At normal speed, with one view, the Umpire’s job is to make a call that in his judgment, reflects what happened. For the most part, we get our calls right.
    As to Catchers flashing signs to a pitcher, that split camera shot is annoying as hell! However, masturbation, it is not. Little Timmy and his silly side-kick, Joe Buck, are the worst of the worst when it comes to broadcasters. Perhaps you meant that they should get a room!

  20. @Mario: Chef did some umpiring for our son’s baseball team this summer, and I admit I had no idea how difficult it is before then. The parents were awful toward the umpires, completely ignoring the fact that the umps were ALL PARENT VOLUNTEERS.

    But as far as the debate theme I mentioned in the original post: At normal speed, with one view, the Umpire’s job is to make a call that in his judgment, reflects what happened. For the most part, we get our calls right.

    Exactly! And part of the fun in fandom is debating what happened in the game that led to the final result. When it’s all rehashed in the instant reply, the focus is off the players and the game and all on the umps. It sucks the air out of the enjoyment.

Comments are currently closed.