That article, sans happy-ish ending, really put me in mind of the guest post from earlier this week.. again with someone’s picture being taken without the woman’s consent and that woman being subjected to scrutiny. However, I was heartened by the woman’s response and the response of the original poster. I do agree with the one comment that noted that the OP seemed more concerned with the damage he was doing to the Reddit community than to the woman herself.
I didn’t see that comment, but it’s true enough. On the other hand, I’m still reeling in shock that someone did a supremely assholeish thing on the internet and then actually repented and apologized, rather than getting defensive or “I’m sorry if you were offended” or all that other usual BS.
I bet that guy that originally posted her picture would have his mind completely blown if realized how many women have facial hair that they wax, pluck, or bleach, so he just doesn’t see it. I’m glad he apologized.
I’m so impressed by this woman’s poise and confidence. I wish I could channel that kind of attitude when I left the house in the morning!
I thought the same thing. Made me REALLY long for the day when not only we as individuals, but all of society, are free to consider the bodies we’re born with as “sacred.”
Made me REALLY long for the day when not only we as individuals, but all of society, are free to consider the bodies we’re born with as “sacred.” Great, so long as those of us who feel very differently and view that notion as inherently oppressive remain free not to consider the bodies we’re born with as “sacred.” Which I very much doubt would be the case if “society” so considered them. I want no part of that kind of utopia.
Honestly, Donna, I would consider the body you have now sacred. I…maybe it’s a Hindu thing, but I feel that the body, and our relationship with our body, isn’t a thing that just starts out automatically sacred. We have to sort of…love ourselves into seeing ourselves and being the way we feel we should be. If that makes sense. I went through a similar process on a smaller scale while my fibromyalgia and my PCOS escalated, where I finally concluded that these hands were my hands (they’re the worst off in my body) and I could love them as I’ve shaped them – stronger with exercises, more dextrous with time and patience, more graceful with mindfulness, more useful with practice, more gentle with loving touch – or I could hate them for being useless to begin with. Both are real states of being, and very different, and I don’t consider my hands at 6 or 10 or 14 or 18 sacred, not even a little bit, but I do consider my hands sacred now. I can’t say that it’s made a difference to my illness itself, but the difference in how I see them now is profound. I guess… I don’t know, it seems like you went through a much bigger, physical and actively traumatic version of the same thing. Feel free to smack me down if I’m wrong (and hell, I probably am, I don’t know how it is to be trans).
Agreed. My body is not sacred. I don’t even know what that means. My body is a bag of meat and vitamins that does some pretty awesome things and some other not-so-awesome things. On the not-awesome side, my body has tried to choke me to death at least a couple of dozen times (I have asthma). What is sacred about that?
Also, we aren’t “born with” the bodies we have now (except for infants). They grow with us, and are shaped by genetics, hormones, environment, choices we don’t and don’t make, etc. People (cis or trans, male or female) aren’t born with breasts, facial hair (or other androgenic hair), long head hair, weights much more than 20lbs, etc.
The bodies we’re born in aren’t “sacred” for many of us, but I long for the day when people stop being so fucking uptight about gender expression.
… yes. I have often been a little bit worried about how the response to transhumanism will be once it really takes off.
I was on reddit when this was first posted, and interestingly enough, one of my first responses was to ask Balpreet if she was aware that facial hair in females could be a symptom of an underlying health condition that might need to be addressed. And then I sat there and the more I looked at the comment, the more poopy and not-okay it seemed to be, so I didn’t post it and gave her an upvote instead. She’s got a great sense of personal identity and self-worth, and I’d like to point out that she’s resisting conventional beauty culture through her religion and faith, and making self-aware choices. Just sayin’ that religion isn’t always what oppresses women, sometimes it can be what frees us.
A couple other people posted something to that effect. It made me cringe a bit to see that some people saw a hairy woman and thought “diseased” but I’m sure the intent was good.
Eh, I don’t know, Chataya. Growing up in a really religious place, the comments I heard about my facial hair were more “ewww so ugly” and “you have the deathfatz and that’s why your body hates you” than “you might have a medical condition”. Which is why it took them 9 years to consider my idea that I might have some hormonal issues. When I finally moved out, and looked up medical professionals, lo and behold, PCOS. Of course, my parents (while wonderful in many other ways) also took six years to get around to getting my eyes checked after I first told them my vision seemed inferior to others’, so make of that what you will.
PCOS was actually my first thought when it came to her facial hair, but she probably has had that suggested to her multiple times. Kind of like when people “kindly” tell fat people it’s bad for their health and they might have some underlying health condition… I’m pretty sure they’re aware of it, and it’s not the job of internet strangers to concern-troll them.
Just sayin’ that religion isn’t always what oppresses women, sometimes it can be what frees us. Yes. Yes. Thank you, yes!
Isn’t her religion just placing a stricture on her that is different than the stricture placed on her by western society? How is that freeing and not just a different stricture?
As I understand it, she is a baptized Sikh, which means she has made the choice to embrace these tenets fully. I’m going off wikipedia a bit here, but there are also a class of people who are Sikh’s but not baptized, and while they believe in the tenets of the faith they’re unsure if they can commit to all of them fully. It’s better to remain unbaptized than become baptized and stop practicing.
But the tenets dictate her behaviour, right? She’s not free. She’s beholden to the tenets of her faith. She doesn’t make choices, she does what she’s told by the faith. Meh. Doesn’t seem free to me. I mean, I suppose she’s free to be a “spiritually weak” Sikh but that’s not exactly value-free free.
Yeah. She *does* seem to have a lot more facial hair than I have seen before on women who had some facial hair, so it is not a completely ridiculous worry. Still, probably not thing to mention though.
I would like to bump chins with Balpreet, in hairy solidarity! Awesome. And is it opposite day on reddit? Well what a great day anyway.