FNTT Season 6: the Anger Managment edition

53 thoughts on FNTT Season 6: the Anger Managment edition

1. EJ. He can say this because he is a fat guy.

2. “tree hugging faggot embracing douche fags” – LOL! That describes me perfectly ;). Although, as a fat girl, I also enjoyed EJ Korvette’s rant, and would love to know why girls like me wouldn’t consider EJ Korvette’s girlfriend fat (but he apparently does) and why it never occured to him that it might not be the fat girls’ low-self-esteem he presumes to be the reason they do not like him… Still: Scary Alexander FTW!

3. EJ–because even though he’s fat, his girlfriend is (or isn’t, I’m not sure) and fat women totes don’t accept him because he’s short. Fat chicks need to get over it but he deserves a silver platter of hankies because he’s been rejected by women in BBW groups so he’s going to fat women in BDSM and polyamoury groups. SO THERE ELEVENTY!!!1!

4. Alexander. He seems angrier than the other two.

5. Hmm, Alexander does seem especially angry and it kinda looks like he used a word generator for some of the comment (and he pointed out tree hugging, which I once did after it was on Sesame Street) but EJ’s basic moan about how he should be showered in offers because *gasp* he’s so accepting of fatness is also tempting.

6. Alexander. “Douche fags” did it for me.

7. Douche fags!!

8. EJ: If you just stop eating out all the time and start exercising you can lose the weight b/c I know that’s the case for me.
   These fat women have the nerve not to want to date me b/c I am short (but I have a gf now who may be fat but isn’t what a lot of fat women would consider fat).

   I’m not even sure what the point of EJ’s post was. Something about BBW not being accepting of their size he hasn’t had success with them b/c of his height and that relates to No-Diet and No-Smoking day.

9. Alexander got my vote… but oh my does EJ like to project his own body-image issues on to other people.

10. I voted for EJ because I’m a fat woman with a short boyfriend 😀

11. EJ for his confused attempt at intersectionality of some kind.

12. Ej because male biology and weight loss is exactly the same as female biology and weight loss. Plus his experience as a man gives him the universal knowledge of women’s experience and fat-shaming is not different for different groups, but is exactly the same. Then the whine of “the girls I deserve access to don’t want me, and its all your fault.” With added bonus marks for the super-specific ultra-picky “In fact I have had considerably more success finding open-minded self-accepting taller fat women in the bdsm, polyamory, and SCA communities than in the “BBW” community.” So it is ok for EJ to be super picky about to whom he is attracted, but if “open-minded self-accepting taller fat women” also have standards that he does not meet, then oh feminism is to blame!

13. Alexander, not for the racial and homophobic slurs, but for this: that’s why I don’t care but I had to say something

    Clearly, going out of your way to read a blog post about a guy you don’t like, on a website you don’t like, and then being compelled to comment on it is a sign of not-caring. Some very intense not-caring.

14. EJ because it’s not really clear why he is writing this… he seems to be alternating between some bizarre form of fat acceptance and total fat hatred. I get the impression he is trying to work out his own confused emotions in his post.

    I’m not sure about MJ, though, the quote seems to me like it could have been an honest question that was just phrased badly.

15. Douche fags! That’s new. I like it.

16. I had to vote for Alexander for creativity. “Douche fag” is a term I’ve never seen before and it’s mind-blowingly confused.

17. All quality trolling. In the end, though, I had to give MJ some love for asking a series of rhetorical questions in what came across — even through the internets! — as passive-aggressive defensiveness.

18. gotta love Alexander; he doesn’t really care he’s just saying so because… well even he’s not really sure. Fags!

19. Have to go with Alexander for this one. Although I don’t think even he knows what he’s so angry about. Now I’m off to hug a tree.

20. Alexander, for squeezing so many slurs into such a short space, and with such creative combinations. Super troll! But EJ Korvette does have some interesting body image issues, and look at the alleged fat man that loves BBW fat-shaming others – “If you just stop EATING SO MUCH and move your ass, you won’t be fat! It’s willpower!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” was the essence of his diatribe. He’s kind of missing the point of what ‘fat acceptance’ means.

21. alexander for this
    tree hugging faggot embracing douche fags

    because the nickname that I was given in high school was tree hugging hippy dippy faggot flower child. This was just too similar to pass up

22. I had to go with Alexander because he is just so fired up over something he doesn’t care about, but had to post about. I’m still trying to wrap my head how “liking John Mayer” equals “being a faggot nigger lover/tree hugging faggot embracing douche fag.” I guess he thinks John Mayer is a gay hippie from Africa? Maybe?

    I’m also confused over what EJ Korvette’s point actually was. Because he likes fat women, they should bow down and appreciate him because no one else will like them because they’re fat? So they should have self-esteem issues because they’re fat and not reject him like the BBW community? But they shouldn’t have self-esteem issues because he likes them?

    Crap, now I’m asking too many questions like MJ. Fiddlesticks.

23. Being a feminist has made me gay, I want my money back.

24. EJ got me because seriously, TMI. I don’t know what he was replying to, but his sexual peccadilloes and preferences were probably not germane. I just got this sense from his comment that all he wanted was for us to understand how this was all about him.

    MJ was second because Alexander was so obviously third. At some point, you’re trying too hard.

25. MJ. That question comes up so often.

26. I had to go with MJ this time.

    He’s pretending to be upset with the branding of Feministe….but what’s really “scary” to him is that he’s describing a little girl character as “pretty” and I’m sure what is disturbing him is his attraction to the image.

27. I went with EJ, because he is such a Nice Guy and a discussion of female body image is obviously an invitation for him to talk about his entire life. I appreciate the fact that he is good at sharing.

    I could have voted for Alexander, because every time I think of ‘douche fags’ it makes me laugh, but it just seems like he’s trying too hard. He sounds exactly like a friend of mine does when he trolls far-right organisations (not condoning the language, although it is kind of hilarious) so I just can’t take him seriously.

28. I’m not even sure what Alexander is trying to say. “I hate John Mayer too, but I gotta tell you… you’re all *string of unrelated slurs*!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111”

29. I voted Alexander, for all his laughably inarticulate rage. Also, I really want a t-shirt that says “tree hugging faggot embracing douche fag”.

30. I voted EJ, because his confusion is just so delightfully hilarious. He’s fat because he eats the same as his non-fat girlfriend, (I’m pretty sure he said she’s not fat, but that’s up for debate) yet all fat people can lose weight if they do what he does! Also love how size acceptance means you’re a hypocrite if you don’t think someone is hot, and also how the size acceptance communities and BBW are the same. OK.

31. Alexander for the high-energy raging, plus pointing out he didn’t care but had to comment anyway.

32. I certainly want to be a douche fag when I grow up. It sounds like an interesting lifestyle choice. Or is that a vocational choice?

33. EJ, for the opening line.

34. lol @ Jay. Instead of those “This is what a feminist looks like” shirts? hahahahaha. I want one too.

35. EJ Seems to have confused size-acceptance, with height-acceptance.

36. I can’t stop laughing over the phrase “douche fag”. lol tree hugger 7, I think its better as a vocational choice

37. I can’t stop laughing over the phrase “douche fag”. lol tree hugger 7, I think its better as a vocational choice

38. Alexander because he seems like the angriest. The passive-aggressive stylings of EJ and MJ are strong contenders but apparently you can’t beat stringing together a barely comprehensible bunch of slurs due to something you claim not to care about.

    The not-really-questions about the girl’s gun seem neverending, to the point of it being kind of an “aww, poor troll” moment.

39. Alexander’s the only one who seems really angry. Plus he doesn’t care but he just has to say something, however incoherent!!!!

    EJ, well, it’s all about him, ain’t it? A little too much self-disclosure with the fact that he sifts through the “bdsm, polyamory, and SCA communities” – what a busy guy! If he’s found so many great gals there, why is he still looking? Just sayin’.

40. My vote goes to EJ for (to me) completely missing the point.

41. EJ, because he’s a fat guy and can say this.

42. I voted for EJ because he fails to mention that the unfair judgment and shame fat people face is in every aspect of their lives, not just in the pursuit of romantic partners.

43. Alexander, for all that rage over something he claims he doesn’t care about. EJ was too tl;dr — I quit reading about halfway through.

44. I’m going with Alexander on this one. He took time to abuse Feministers for caring about something he doesn’t.
    And for bringing us faggot embracing. I can do a lot with this idea.

45. LOL @ “tree hugging faggot embracing douche fags”

    soooooo angry brain esplody!!

    Ahha…that was cute.

46. Alexander, because his image of us hugging both people and inanimate objects contrasts so nicely with the last round, where trolls basically told us all we were shitting on people, ideas, and inanimate objects.

47. Meh. Me and my best friend said douche fag in middle school a lot and we thought it was really clever. Because that’s exactly what it is: middle school humor.

48. MJ seemed, on a charitable reading, like he might just be genuinely confused by the Feministe logo. And EJ, while a moron, at least brings up a valid point about how people in size acceptance circles can still have major issues about size, which they express in subtler ways–a point made, btw, much better by William Leith in his life-as-a-food-addicted-fat-guy memoir “The Hungry Years”.

    Alexander, on the other hand–3 “fag”s and an n-word, in just 2 sentences! All because he doesn’t care! Love it.

49. EJ got my vote because of the utter logic fail: He thinks that because he’s lost weight several times that means he’s good at losing weight. Reminds me of when I used to jokingly say, “I’m so good at quitting smoking I’ve done it twice!”

    And also because of his “why do we need size acceptance? I accept people’s sizes and I am everybody!” fail.

50. Hmm, it’s hard to go past Alexander for “douche fags” (and for sheer inarticulate tantrum-throwing), but EJ wins because he could stop if he really wanted to, and somehow feminists are to blame.

51. EJ, because I love a mystery and the statement “fat girls wouldn’t consider my girlfriend fat” is a total mystery… other than he has a girlfriend willing to put up with him it tell me nothing. My imagination goes wild: perhaps she is a Neptunian Lesbian Midget with cankors for eyes?

52. Though I found Alexander’s post to be quite festive, it seemed like maybe he got on the wrong site. Seemed like he really wanted to whomp on the man on man love thing and got disoriented. So I went EJ. I couldn’t actually follow the rant about fat this and short that and have no idea what BBW stands for– but I really enjoyed the pace and passion of it. That baby was spewing!

53. Some yummy troll meat served up today, wow. Let me get my fork…

    MJ is confused by the world at large and can’t even get past the blog header before his/her mind explodes with questions. It’s a scary world out there, MJ. I recommend chocolate milk (and if it makes you fat, you can date EJ).

    Alexander is too angry to be coherent. I think he had a brain melt down at the end and just started typing random insults.

    EJ–wow. He has it all. In addition to what others have mentioned, he is both looking for a g/f and claims to have one. Best of all, HE GAVE US FAT ACCEPTANCE HOMEWORK.

    Dude, you complete me.

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