…Sicilian for “when the cat is away the mice will play” (will dance), which is kinda how I feel when I’m guest blogging. I’ve guest-blogged twice, and posted two introductions at Feministe, here and here; my first introduction at my own blog is here. So, as Harold Melvin and the Blue Notes sang, “if you don’t know me by now…..”
Then again, I’ve never done a “100 things”. Don’t know if I’ll make it to 100….
1. Like many people, I have a lot posted on my fridge. Reminders, some of my daughter’s drawings (she loves to draw!), grocery lists, coupons, photos, etc. Some of the distinctly “Lubu” things up there are: the lyrics to Solidarity Forever, a photo taken from an anarchist newspaper of a group of men at a NOW march holding up a sign that says “Men who don’t support women’s rights should Fuck Themselves”, holy cards, and a magnet that says “Sicilians are Sensational”.
2. I was a Marvel Comics fan as a kid; I looked forward to trips to the grocery store because it usually meant a new comic book (even when my parents were broke-as-a-joke. Comics still qualified as “reading”, and I liked drawing the characters, too). Grocery stores these days (at least where I live) don’t sell comics anymore—you have to go to a comics and/or magazine store for that. I feel like my daughter is missing out, since she isn’t getting the same opportunity to enjoy comics as often as I did. She likes Spider Man, but unlike me, her favorite villian is Venom—-mine was/is Doc Ock.
3. Speaking of comics, MAD Magazine provided me with a lot of introduction to mainstream cultural norms. I grew up with a weird combination of ethnic and hippified “norms”, and didn’t have the same references/assumptions/behaviors as most of my schoolmates (and I didn’t realize this, nor realize that was a Problem, ’till I had a couple of years of school under my belt). MAD magazine played with cultural norms; it was from there that I first encountered the idea that discussions of politics and religion were regarded as ‘impolite’. I distinctly remember a trip to the liquor store with my father, where I was sitting in the front seat reading a skit in MAD that involved the politics/religion taboo. I asked him, “Is it true that people aren’t supposed to talk about politics or religion?” and he said something to the effect of “(sigh) Well, some people don’t think so because they don’t like to argue.” I asked, “So what the hell do they talk about, then?!” He spit his drink across the front of the windshield and laughed his ass off.
4. Yeah, he was driving to the liquor store with a drink in his hand.
5. My CD collection is a never-ending source of amusement for friends and family for its sheer size. I could single-handedly outfit a radio station. I scope out used record stores everywhere I go. I still have some vinyl, but mostly just rare stuff—bootlegs, picture discs, never-released-on-CD, etc.
6. My musical taste is eclectic, but for the most part I listen to soul/R & B and blues. My folks used to take me to a lot of houseparties as a kid, and I busied myelf flipping through the crates until some kindly adult or another would let me take charge of the stereo. That’s where I got my music jones. Well that, and driving all over hell’s half acre, flipping through radio stations (my parents did the driving, silly. I was in the back seat next to the speakers. Back before radio apartheid got into full swing).
7. Yes, radio apartheid. Critic Greg Tate coined the phrase to refer to the strict formats that became popular from the late-70’s on. Back in the day, you could hear Stevie Wonder and Led Zeppelin on the same station, the same program. Not anymore. Even satellite radio has fairly narrow formatting, though it is broader than FM. The only non-satellite radio worth listening to tends to be at the low end of the dial where the college and community radio stations are. Midwestern stations suck ass, which is one more thing feeding my CD jones.
8. I could probably drive I-55 in my sleep. I grew up on I-55; I have every curve between St. Louis and Chicago embedded in my brain. In fact, I remember when I-55 was still being built (god, I’m old). Like most other people in Illinois, I measure distance by the time it takes to get there (“oh, that’s a two-hour drive”).
9. I’m an inveterate bookworm. I love books. Used bookstores, along with used record stores, are my idea of paradise. “Have you read all that?” is what folks say when they come over—I have a lot of bookshelves, and other books on coffee tables, as coffee tables, etc. Mostly nonfiction. I’ve been reading books since I was two, and I know before this day is over (because I will be at a family gathering) I will get to hear stories about my early reading (or reading speed). I hope not within my daughter’s earshot—she has a hard time reading, though she does love books. I read books to her before bed, because her interest and vocabulary level is more teen/adult, but she currently reads below grade level. I wish I knew how to teach her—I don’t remember learning, myself. We’re slogging through. Her accuracy is better than her speed, which I think is a good thing. NCLB prefers speed to accuracy, which makes her test scores low. Speed first, comprehension later—I think that’s bass-ackwards. Fuck NCLB, and fuck standardized tests. Don’t get me started…
10. I have a long memory. I regard it as more a blessing than a curse.
11. I’m very visual-spatial oriented. I’m a non-linear thinker. I go off into tangents at every opportunity, and somewhere along the way I’ve figured out that I sometimes need to find my way back to the beginning, or somewhere in the vicinity of. It isn’t always easy. I like the tangents, the off-the-beaten-paths. I prefer backroads to the interstate.
12. I’m an only child. Well, sort of. My older brother was born premature about a year before I was born. He only lived for eight hours. He’s buried above one of my great-grandfathers. People are often surprised to find out I’m an only child—I chalk that up to my physical appearance (stereotypical sicilian looks must equal stereotypical sicilian family, no?), but it may be also because I can tune out loud noises and uproar (I’ll be reading at the break table while everyone else is arguing sports). Or maybe because I have a loud voice. I don’t always use that volume, but it’s there when I want it to be.
13. I’ve got an extended family to make up for being an only child. Over twenty first cousins, and you don’t wanna know how many second- and third- cousins. That’s probably how I developed that booming voice and tuning-out ability—frequent family gatherings where everything is done at the top of one’s lungs.
14. I love to cook. When I was a kid, I’d pull up a chair to the stove while my dad (usually my dad; my mom worked second or third shift, depending on where she worked) cooked sugu (sauce—don’t believe that bullshit about “real Italians call it gravy”. Bah. No one in my family ever called it anything but sauce or sugu. Watch “A Bronx Tale”. When the young protagonist, Calogero, French kisses his girlfriend Jane for the first time, he can’t believe how good that felt and says, “do you know how to make sauce?!” Jane, being African-American, has no idea what the hell he is talking about, nor did she get the cultural implication—she gives him an “are you outta your mind” look and says, “WHAT?!!” But…..sauce. I coulda cried—-they said “sauce” on film, not “gravy”!). Now, where was I? Oh yeah, chair by the stove. Anyway, some of my earliest memories are of hanging over that stove, watching the ingredients go in, stirring the pot, smelling—–god, the smelling!—of the delicious dinner to come. By the time I was my daughter’s age, I was cooking dinner. I aim to make the food I cook taste almost better than sex. I was “slow food” before it had a name. Every dinner should taste like a celebration.
15. I eat fast. (that’s probably another reason folks think I’m not an only child). I once had a foreman (without my knowledge) clock me while I ate three chili dogs; one minute twenty seconds (“One minute, twenty seconds.” “What?!” “That’s how fast you ate those damn chili dogs. I’d’a thrown up by now.”). What can I say, I was hungry! I don’t eat humongous meals anymore, nor do I eat quite as fast; getting older and mellowing out, I guess. My nickname at the union hall stems from my (formerly) prodigous appetite.
16. I’m a casual person. Don’t much like formal attire or events. I’m more around-the-way, easygoing, laid-back. I live in blue jeans. Big earrings are about my only nod to femininity, though I did admire the air-brushed flower on my neighbor’s big toe the other day when she came over—and she got it at the nail salon by the dojo my daughter and I attend. Maybe I’ll get one, too.
17. I write the way I speak; freestyle.
18. There’s a lot about the avenues of the internet I travel, that I don’t ‘get’. For example, why do people post those random lists of songs, rather than what they’re actually listening to? And why does the title for their random ten have nothing to do with any of the songs on there? (not that I recognize most of the songs to begin with). And thank God for google, or otherwise I’d never know what expressions like ‘jump the shark’ or ‘the Villagers’ meant. I’ve never seen “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”—saw the film when it came out, but never the tv show. Never seen “Battlestar Galactica”. It’s a window on a world.
19. I know I can’t be the only person on Feministe that ever went to the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
20. I miss kactus. Kactus, come back!!
21. I’m a single mother. An “unwed” (*gasp!* disgraciada!) mother. I enjoy life more as a mother than I ever did before. It’s not what I’m “supposed” to say, but I don’t give a shit. I experience joy in motherhood, even in struggle. I don’t understand what is supposed to be so controversial about that. And hey, my daughter thinks I’m doing a good job.
22. My folks took me to a lot of labor events and picket lines as a kid. There’s not so many picket lines now, but I do take my daughter to labor events, and make a point of teaching her labor history.
23. I’m at mid-life crisis age, right? *snicker* I think for my mid-life crisis, I’m not gonna get a Harley. I’m gonna get me a bass guitar.
24. I eloped at nineteen. Got divorced by twenty-five. Wasn’t in any hurry to do any of that again.
25. My mother has metastatic breast cancer. She was first diagnosed with breast cancer in her early forties. After a rather lengthy hiatus, it came back. It is in her bones, and there is more uptake activity now. She’s going through more radiation, and will probably get more chemo. She has started Herceptin. She’s had the kind of pain oxycontin doesn’t get rid of—and she’s pretty tough when it comes to pain. So. Prayers, novenas, good vibes, etc. are all appreciated.
26. I try to keep a spirit of gratitude. Take heart in the everyday simple pleasures. Some of the simple pleasures I’ve been enjoying lately include: keeping in touch with friends and catching up with friends I haven’t seen in while, going to parties and laughing my ass off, watching action/adventure movies with my mom and daughter, watching boxing matches with my dad, breaking a good sweat when working out, getting aggression out on the heavy pads/bags, early morning ass-crack-of-dawn quiet cups of strong coffee before the daily grind, reading “A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints” by Dito Montiel (I suspect reading it will send most folks here on a nostalgia binge just like it did me—-kinda like Lauryn Hill’s “Every Ghetto, Every City” or the Digable Planets “Where I’m From”), reading “Lionboy” by Zizou Corder to my girl before she drifts off to sleep (adventure, supernatural abilities, futurism, and cats—she’s loving it), tunes old and new (Anthony Hamilton, Teena Marie, Peter Gabriel’s “Big Blue Ball”, Rahsaan Patterson, Robert Plant/Alison Krauss, D’Angelo, Santana, Jill Scott, Angie Stone, E Street Radio, Grace Potter and the Nocturnals’ “Ah Mary”, and the ‘new’ Dylan “Dreaming of You” have all been doin’ it to me in my eardrums lately), lots of eggplant dishes, quesadillas, and a recipe I tried with chorizo/shrimp/chipotle and zucchini that hit the spot….
What’s been turning you on lately? Or, what do you like to do when the cat’s away?
P.S.: I tried to put the list under a “fold”, but the tag didn’t work. If anyone can tell me how to do that properly, it would be much appreciated!