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Christian Science with Uncle John

Lauren

And I’m going to do something special with this hot, red pickle right over here.

via Boing Boing

14 thoughts on Christian Science with Uncle John

  1. 1) who on earth thought of this??

    2) why pickles?

    3) why is god sticking a fork in my ass and in my head?

    4) how, oh how, will i be able to keep myself from trying this useful and entertaining experiment at home?

    feminist love,
    jen

  2. YES! This video made me laugh so hard when I saw it on Boing Boing. At first, I thought it was just pretty average saccharine Sunday School material (I taught Sunday School for four years, so it gave me a bit of nostalgia), and the pickle looked pretty fucking rad all glowing and sparking.

    But then at the end of the video, it seems they forgot to turn the lights back out, and the dude is comparing the pickle to a Christian emanating holy light…as it turns rubbery and dried out and a mysterious black liquid oozes out of its impaled rind. Apparently Christians are just like toxic Satan pickles.

  3. Next up on the Christian Science hour, Kirk Cameron’s buddy demonstrates the scientific worth of intelligent design using only a banana!

  4. Ok, my high school physics/chemistry teacher loved this demo. It is actual science, he’s making plasma in there, not the light of some holy touch.

    Even better, electrified pickle is the most disgusting smelling thing, and is absolutely inedible. Nobody wants anything to do with it after the demo.

    I guess it IS a pretty good comparison to a Christian…

  6. A, my favourite part of that “proof” is that bananas (as we know them) don’t exist in nature — they were selectively bred.

    WHICH IS PROOF THAT GOD MADE THEM JUST FOR US.

  7. I didn’t know my favorite science experiment could become MORE phallic, but it has! I was hoping the “bad pickle” would jerk off too much and get electrocuted. That’s disturbingly “creative,” I’m sorry.

  8. I dunno… is it a miracle or is it science?? I am so confused!

    And Iā€™m going to do something special with this hot, red pickle right over here.

    I am so getting my girlfriend to call me her hot, red pickle. šŸ˜€

  9. As a native New Yorker, I am enraged at this sacrilegious mistreatment of a sweet innocent little pickle who never bothered anyone!!!! Does he have no shame?!!!

    *Sniff* *Sniff* What a waste of a good pickle.

  10. This made me laugh so hard! I’m shaking with some silent giggles here. It’s best when the thing spews all that liquid. Hehehehe!

  11. So becoming a Christian will cause me to roast slowly from the inside out, my sweet pure bodily fluids becoming a smoking, toxic mess?

    I feel this analogy is lacking something.

  14. I guess I just don’t get it. It just your standard Sunday School-style object lesson. What does this have to do with feminism–unless your are trying to make fun of Christians because, naturally, they are all misogynistic. In which case I’m pretty disappointed in *your* narrow mindedness.

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