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Friday Random Ten – the Voluntary Homicide edition

As in, I’m going to commit one if the bar isn’t over soon. But this video relieves my anger (how cute is this?):

I saw her last week and she was fabulous. Now, the 10:

1. Mark Lanegan – Come to Me
2. Clap Your Hands Say Yeah – Is This Love?
3. Santogold – Your Voice
4. Bob Dylan – Absolutely Sweet Marie
5. Regina Spektor – That Time
6. The Capstan Shafts – Drop Dead Innocuous
7. Jans Lekman – Friday Night at the Drive-In Bingo
8. Charles Mingus – Body and Soul
9. Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds – Opium Tea
10. Feist – When I Was a Young Girl

And because I just can’t study any more, I’m going to take a cue from Megan and make it a Meme Friday: Your top 5 best break-up songs. Except I’m doing way more than 5, because I’m bored. And no, I’m not going through a break-up either, as I am happily married to BarBri (and seeing this one guy on the side), but everyone has their rotating list of what they listen to when they’re hurting in the heart, right? So here are mine (leave yours in the comments):

FYI: Many of the videos are fan-made, or whatever I could find on YouTube. But the songs are all accurate.

1. Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Cheated Hearts. I know everyone loves Fever to Tell, and I personally think it’s up there on the list of Best Sex Albums. But I prefer Show Your Bones — it is an excellent break-up album, and also strangely energizing.

2. Ben Harper – The Drugs Don’t Work. I haven’t really listened to Ben Harper since he was all the rage when I was in high school, but if you want to be taken back to your angsty teenage years when heartbreak was really the worst, this is the tune. And yes, I like his version better than The Verve’s.

3. Bonnie Rait – I Can’t Make You Love Me. I think Prince songs are often better as covers than originals, and this is no exception. Prince is just so good at the depressing thing.

4. Jets to Brazil – Sea Anemone. This is on the same album as one of my favorite love songs (Sweet Avenue), so, sucks to be this guy. I’ve never had to move out of my apartment after a break-up, but it sounds like living in a hotel doesn’t help the healing process.

5. Tom Waits – Please Call Me, Baby. There are several Tom songs that could make the list, but this is the one I end up playing on repeat when it’s a red-wine-and-tears night.

6. Elvis Costello – I Want You. Ever get cheated on? This one’s for you.

7. Ani Difranco – Grey. I hesitate to put this one on here because it’s just so stereotypical, but you know, Ani is good. And at least it’s not “Untouchable Face,” right?

8. The Blow – True Affection. Only listen to this one if you aren’t too bitter. It’s that on-good-terms break-up song.

9. Janis Joplin – Piece of My Heart. Because would any break-up-song list be complete without it?

10. Beth Orton – Ooh Child. Another requirement. And Beth Orton’s version is just so much more depressing and haunting than the original — perfect when you don’t actually want to feel like things are going to get easier.

11. Portishead – Sour Times. I think I was in 8th grade when I bought this album, and I used to sit in my room and write in my very angry 8th grade diary while I listened to it. It’s still that good.

12. Spoon – Everything Hits at Once. Because it’s so true.

13. The Cure – Pictures of You. Requisite. And if nothing else, the hair in that video should make you cry.

14. Citizen Cope & Santana – Sideways. This one gets me. I haven’t had an actual breakup in a good long while and studying for the bar has effectively quelled any emotions I ever had — it’s kind of amazing just how soulless it can make you — but when this song comes on, I kind of remember what it was like to have “feelings.”

15. Mariah Carey – Shake it Off. Yeah that’s right. What?

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28 thoughts on Friday Random Ten – the Voluntary Homicide edition

  1. Ooh LOVE Portishead’s Dummy. What a brilliant album. If you like them you should listen to Uh Huh Her’s “Run”, “I see red”, and “Say so”. All amazing songs. The only thing is that you have to go to their myspace page (just google Uh Huh Her and myspace) because their album technically doesn’t drop until August 19th (i have their first EP so its how i heard the songs)

    I think that you should totally have a “Songs that make me think that being a lawyer (or insert your choice of career) is still worth it despite hellish Bar (or insert your career’s) Exam” song list. Personally I have to listen to Erasure’s “A little respect” at least once a day to make me feel happy. Especially after trying to remember for the umpteenth time the California evidence distinctions–I really hate the Bar exam 🙁

  2. Strange- Tori Amos
    Diamonds and Rust- Joan Baez
    When I was Drinking- Hem
    There’s a Fine, Fine Line- Avenue Q
    And I can’t decide between Total Eclipse of the Heart- Bonnie Tyler and Nothing Compares to You- Sinead O’Conner, both of which I have drunk karaoked after a break-up and made myself cry while singing.

    I am clearly interested only in wallowing and not in making myself feel better.

  3. Delurking (just this once) to share my “feels like a breakup to me…” list and freely acknowledge my terrible taste in music.

    I Love You, Goodbye – Thomas Dolby
    Sun Comes Up, It’s Tuesday Morning – Cowboy Junkies (a happy breakup song)
    Already Gone – Blue Rodeo
    It’s Too Late Baby – Carole King
    I Forget You Every Day – Chris Whitley

  4. Too many to count, but here are three I have found to be effective commiserators.

    Green Day-Time of Your Life
    I was really surprised when most people seemed to miss the point of view/message of the song. Playing it drunk seems to bring out the essence of the song so much more so.

    Mike Ness- Don’t Think Twice
    A Dylan cover but with a good bit more bite to it when covered by the lead in Social Distortion.

    Rancid- Ruby Soho
    I like this one because of the story of the break-up that inspired the song. Considered a smart choice by the participants to end it, yet no less painful then a bitter end.

  5. @ Natalie: OMG I LOVE AVENUE Q AND I LOVE THAT SONG!!

    My 5 break-up songs:

    5. “The Blower’s Daughter” by Damien Rice
    4. “Mexico” by Jump (Little Children)
    3. “Far Away” by John Frusciante
    2. “Nothing Compares to You” by Sinead O’Conner
    1. TBA

  6. My one and only ultimate breakup song is “Here Comes The Rain Again”, mostly because it was playing on my walkman when I was walking home in the rain the day my freshman-year-of-college boyfriend broke up with me very much against my own wishes.

    “Losing My Religion” by R.E.M. strikes a similar cord, for completely different personal reasons.

    And cosigning Lauren O’s Smiths suggestion.

  7. I have to add my two:

    1) The World Has Turned and Left Me Here – Weezer – it was good enough for my high school boyfriends, and still good enough for my boyfriends today.
    2) Pink Bullets – The Shins – I cry every. single. time. when he says, “To finally fly apart, we had to cut them off.”

  8. Song for the Dumped by Ben Folds Five, although I tend to listen and scream along to it regardless of relationship status.

    Other than that, I just like angry songs during breakups, I find I get to sappy for my own tastes when I listen to real heart tugging songs during that time.

  9. Feist + Sesame Street = dream come true. I mean, talk about a good tv show…:D

    favourite breakup songs….hm. my songs during my last breakup were
    Rootless Tree by Damien Rice (it’s ungodly satisfying to sing along as he screams, “f–k you, f–k you, f–k you and all we’ve been through”.)
    As Cool as I Am by Dar Williams
    Where Have You Been by Reel Big Fish (oh yes.)
    Fire Door by Ani D.
    Waste of Paint by Bright Eyes

  10. Janis Joplin- Farewell Song
    Fiona Apple- Love Ridden
    Fiona Apple- Never is a Promise
    Bob Dylan- Idiot Wind

    all completely miserable but most excellent.

  11. I haven’t had a break-up for a looong time, but the last one, I just listened to the Lost in Translation soundtrack and the Postal Service and the Shins’ Chutes Too Narrow over and over again, which means you can pinpoint when it was almost to the month. (Heh.) They are all kind of melancholy, but don’t bring the big melodramatic sad, which I totally couldn’t have dealt with right then.

  12. The Dresden Dolls: Good Day
    Sentenced: Despair Ridden Hearts
    Monster Magnet: Little Bag of Gloom
    Bob Dylan: Simple Twist of Fate
    Garbage: Happy Home

    I guess in my case they don’t really count as break up songs so much as songs loss and resignation, but the feelings are the same. Truth be told theres a few that would probably be better on that list but that aren’t really appropriate for the context here (Type O Negative).

  13. I haven’t checked the replies, because you already said a lot of good ones on the original post.

    I made a mix when I got divorced – it was a few years ago, but it still works.

    Gloria Gaynor – I Will Survive….of course!
    Ani di Franco – As Is (OK, OK, and Untouchable Face)
    Love and Rockets – No Big Deal
    Tom Waits – Blue Skies, Bad Liver and a Broken Heart, I’m Still Here…and about 500 other songs. I can’t listen to Tom Waits without feeling like I just got dumped.
    The Mountain Goats – No Children
    REO Speedwagon – Time for me to Fly
    Blink 182 – Damnit (This is Growing Up)
    Alien Ant Farm – Just Like the Movies

    I know there were other songs….dang…

  14. Enjoy Your Day- Alkaline Trio
    Happy Now?- No Doubt
    Band of Gold- Freda Payne
    Just One More Day- Otis Redding (really ANY Otis will do)

    and… to completely destroy me…
    Apart- The Cure

    Bonus for the spanish speakers: Rayando el Sol- Mana

    BTW, I know its the song that made her career and all, but does NO ONE realize that Nothing Compares 2 U is actually a Prince song?

  15. The more emotionally forceful breakup songs from the Cure, to me, were always A Letter To Elise and Disintegration – the latter one is amazingly bilious and bitter, it always stuns me.

    As far as other songs, I’d say Ty Tabor’s entire solo album Safety would function since it deals pretty much entirely with his divorce.

    (apologies for doubleposts, I keep getting 500 errors)

  16. I have a pretty massive collection of break-up songs. It’s a thing. Even though I’m happily engaged and don’t much plan on being single or heartbroken again. A few in no particular order (and some are not exactly break-up songs, so much as “it’s crashing down on us” or “fuck, this just hurts so much”…)

    Fuck Was I, Jenny Owens Young
    School Night, Ani DiFranco (I know, but it’s fucking heartbreaking)
    Good Woman, Cat Power
    Let It Die, Feist
    Love Ridden, Fiona Apple
    How To Fight Loneliness, Wilco
    Let Him Fly, Patty Griffin
    Let’s Just Get Naked, Joan Osborne
    Crazy Baby, Joan Osborne
    The Reason The Night is Long, Rainer Maria
    Maps, Yeah Yeah Yeahs

  17. Don’t Die in Me by Mirah: sad, acoustic, with both pain and affection. And uncertainty.
    I Don’t Believe in the Sun by The Magnetic Fields: straight out, cliche-ridden moping.
    Round We Go by Dizzee Rascal: Angry. And sarcastic. For that drama-laden relationship that got way too complicated and you should have ended it months ago.
    Marlene on the Wall by Suzanne Vega: For that breakup where you’re convinced that you JUST DON’T KNOW WHO YOU ARE ANYMORE. Plus Suzanne Vega was the first music I ever used to listen to, in my dad’s car, and so it’s innately comforting.
    Probably the entirety of Thom Yorke’s solo album. That’s what you listen to when you can’t or won’t get out of bed.

  18. Damn, internet, get out of my head. Too timely of a list this week, unfortunately, so I am happy to have new suggestions.

    As of Wednesday, I have pretty much had Superstar by Sonic Youth on a continuous loop, so you know its bad…

    Normally though, breakup songs include:

    Susan by Aimee Mann
    Haunted by The Pogues
    I Fall to Pieces by Patsy Cline
    Fade Into You by Mazzy Star
    The Last Thing I Needed First Thing This Morning by Willie Nelson

    This is obviously the wallowing version of this list. There’s a whole different list for the angry-bitter getting better phase, hoping for that soon.

  19. I don’t really have a list, but during my last really big breakup I listened to Dido’s Life for Rent (which is about her breakup). I haven’t listened to it much since, because it mostly takes me back to the breakup.

  20. “So Long to the Circus,” The World/Inferno Friendship Society–the guy who got me into them was also the guy who broke up with me a few months later, so this one hits double for me. But seriously, this is the best angry/hurt break-up song EVER. Say goodbye to the circus, and don’t cry/it was just another circus, it was just your first time/didn’t you what you were doing didn’t know what you missed/what did you get out of this/that love is real, unstoppable/actually a wild animal/self-interested, amorally cruel/and you got between it and food…
    http://youtube.com/watch?v=hqVQJKIdpkg

    Aaand on the total opposite end of the spectrum from cabaret punk… “Undiscovered,” Ashlee Simpson. Yeah, I know. Listen: this is a great total-desperation-loss-of-dignity song.
    http://youtube.com/watch?v=FwFjde8-JlY

    Can I embarrass myself more after that? Can I? YES! YES I CAN! Canadian dramaInstant Star has a bunch of great break-up songs. My favorite right now is probably “Just Wanted Your Love,” which is catchy and upbeat and has great vocals.
    http://youtube.com/watch?v=Bpcon_n6jmw

    Also, I can’t believe after all the Ani love on this thread, no one has mentioned “Both Hands.” Come on, people. What kind of crunchy granola Birkenstocks-wearing hairy-legged feminists are you?? (Though, actually, my favorite Ani break-up song at the moment–gosh there are a lot of them–is probably “Hour Follows Hour.”)

    This is a depressing list, mine and others’. I’m gonna close with a happier break-up song for all y’all who need to remember that maybe you are better off (“ooh! it! feels GOOD to be free” indeed)–Rilo Kiley’s “Breakin’ Up.”
    http://youtube.com/watch?v=wsnCf9SdSB0

  21. So Long So Wrong – Alison Krauss & Union Station – was perfect for my triumphant, victorious getaway from one bad relationship.

    Deeper Than Crying – Alison Krauss and Union Station – was listening to that around the same time. Wasn’t a good fit for that situation, as no love did remain, but I can imagine it would be a good song to listen to.

    Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye – Steam

    Goodbye is Forever – Arcadia – for when you want to wallow in it.

    White Flag – Dido – for when you REALLY want to wallow in it

  22. “Turn on Me”-The Shins

    Here’s why:

    Turn On Me

    You can fake it for a while,
    bite your tongue and smile,
    like every mother does her ugly child.
    But it starts to leaking out,
    like spittle from a cloud,
    amassed resentment pelting ounce and pound.

    You entertaining any doubts,
    ’cause you had to know that I was fond of you. Fond of Y-O-U.
    Though I knew you masked your disdain
    I can see the change was just too hard for us,
    you always had to hold the reigns,
    but where I’m headed you just don’t know the way.

    So affections fade away,
    or do adults just learn to play,
    the most ridiculous repulsive games?
    All our favorite ruddy sons,
    and their double-barrelled guns,
    you’d better hurry rabbit, run, run, run!
    ‘Cause mincing you is fun,
    and there’s a lot of hungry hatters in this world set on taking over.
    But brittle thorny stems,
    they break before they bend,
    and neither one of us is one of them.

    And the tears will never mend,
    ’cause you had it in for me so long ago.
    I don’t know why and I don’t care, well hardly anymore.
    If you’d only seen yourself hating me,
    when I’d been so much more than fair.
    But then you’d have to lay those feelings bare.
    The one thing I know has still got you scared.
    Yeah all that cold ire,
    and never once aired on a dare!

    (bridge)

    You had to know know that I was fond of you.
    Fond of Y-O-U. So I took your licks at the time.
    A change like that is just so hard to do,
    don’t let it whip-crack your life.
    And I’ll bow out from the fight –
    Those old pious sisters were right –
    the worst part is over,
    now get back on that horse and ride.

  23. Oh, I have a huge breakup mix on my iPod.

    The best and most heartwrenching of all time for me is still Tori Amos’s “Hey Jupiter.” Something about that song will reduce me to a whimpering mess in about 2.5 seconds. I literally have to fast-forward it if it comes up on shuffle at the wrong times.

    Lily Allen and La Winehouse got me through a recent one–“Smile” and “Tears Dry On Their Own” respectively.

    Lucero’s “It Gets The Worst At Night” is an absolute classic. (This is a live video, and the singer is such a fox.)

    Lauryn Hill’s “Ex Factor” is another one that has associations with a very specific ex in my life, and will make me cry if it comes upon me unawares.

    And of course Fiona Apple’s entire first album. And the other two. Basically, Fiona was made for breakups.

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