Walk a Mile in Her Shoes April 28, 2007 Jill An anti-violence walk in California gets men to walk in high heels to raise money for the Valley Trauma Center. I love it. Thanks to Tricia for the link.
Hey, that’s in my (relative) area. I’ll start working on the husband now to get him to walk next year. I’ll even promise to buy him a nice pair of Naturalizers or Easy Spirits so he doesn’t break his ankle.
Love it. What a great way to draw attention to the issue and to how women’s incapacitation is normalized.
I do not understand how a woman can wear high heels. Glad those men tried to walk in heels to know how it feels. High heels look painful. Like a corset for feet.
a) These guys rock. It is rare for an article on feministe to put a smile upon my face. b) Hoosier, if you start with 6″+, you have a decent chance breaking the front of your foot. It will mend, and then you’re set for heels “fun” — it won’t break in the same place again. đ Breaking your ankles is optional. đ c) While I cherish the sentiment — is it me, or did the words come out wonky? Men are affected too — oh, so now it’s about you, and therefore relevant? How about rejecting it because it’s all sorts of wrong, independent from whether you have a stake in it? Or maybe, that’s just my headache-grumpiness speaking.
Can this be mandatory for shoe designers? Like, before they’re allowed to put a shoe on the market, they have to walk a quarter-mile or so in them, without breaking something or needing a painkiller afterwards?
This is a good thing? I mean, I’m delighted that men are fighting (men’s) violence against women, but high heels? BARF. It just normalizes the shoes, it trivializes them, and reduces women to their own drag. Barf barf barf. Really. Men carrying signs opposing men’s violence against women would send a better and healthier message. Honestly, I find this insulting.
Ann, I’m totally with you. When men wear women’s clothing in our society, they’re either A) probably expecting they’ll be harassed or B) looking for laughs. While I understand the good intent behind this campaign, the automatic reaction to a bunch of dudely dudes in heels is gonna either be “FAGS!” or “Haha, HILAAAARIOUS!”, neither of which is a desired response. The idea of men in heels is going to be received as absurd and comical, and I don’t think they should be using humor (though, again, not their intent) to combat the issue of violence against women. In fact, I always find the whole “men in drag” thing to have a very mocking tone, as if to say “look at these silly WOMAN costumes the men have on!” and I typically hate that particular ploy for yuks… cross-dressing “Kids in the Hall” characters excepted.
Men carrying signs opposing menâs violence against women would send a better and healthier message. Maybe, but signs are boring. I’ve been thinking about it, and the high heel thing is really part of the whole “pain of being a woman” idea–so perhaps they’re trying to empathize, and also to ask the question of why the female experience should necessarily be painful.
yeah, for the full effect, they should have to wear pantyhose too. and when they inevitably get a run people should pull them aside and go ‘dear, you have a run in your stockings’ as if you always bring extra stockings to work and can afford to change into new stockings practically every day … … i’m sorry, i think i got a little off topic there.
It’s a sad truth that some people actually need something to affect them before they care about it. That said those poor guys XD I wear heels when dressed up but I make sure that they are both thick in the heel and round at the toe. Then again I’m a J-rock fan so guys in platform heels are nothing new to me
I’ve never understood how women can wear high heels. I did when I was in my local theatre company’s production of The Rocky Horror Show, I only had to wear them for the floor show scene, maybe ten or fifteen minutes total. I wanted painkillers after the first thirty seconds. Those things are designed by sadists. Nevermind the possibility of turning an ankle, just wearing them at all is painful. I did luck out re: pantyhose though. The costume called for fishnets and apparently they don’t run as easily…
I don’t understand it either, Brad, and I’m a woman. I think I’m a really lucky woman who managed to escape the worst of the “You must do these things to be feminine!” part of growing up female (having a mother who scorned all beauty standards rather helped too). I never learned how to walk in ultra-high heels and would probably shuffle along like those dudes if someone put a pair on my feet.
I donât think they should be using humor (though, again, not their intent) to combat the issue of violence against women. I respectfully disagree with you, but I don’t agree with this in particular. Why not? Would comedians doing a benefit show also be inappropriate? Kind of a threadjack question. Sorry.
lucizoe As for walking, I can’t speak for everyone, and I only wore maybe 1.5 or 2 inch heels, nothing really high, but once I got past the “OMG my feet have died and gone to hell” pain, I learned how to walk in ’em, at least well enough to dance in the floorshow, in about an hour. Of course, I had a couple of very nice coaches who, once they stopped laughing at my pitiful attempts to walk, gave me some very good advice. What astonishes me is that a couple of my female friends actually like the things, and go out of their way to buy and wear them.
Men carrying signs opposing menâs violence against women would send a better and healthier message. Did you look at the pictures? They *were* carrying signs opposing men’s violence against women. I think it’s great. It’s a way for men to be visible in their opposition to rape, and to call for men to identify with women and the particular ways in which women are oppressed. I don’t see that as a bad thing. It’s street theater, which, as someone pointed out, can rarely have as much nuance as we’d like. I recognize the objections that the slogan “rape hurts us all” makes it be about men’s pain too, and that it shouldn’t have to be one’s own pain in order to take responsibility yadda yadda yadda. Yes, true. But it’s a way to call for men taking an active role in the reduction of rape, and for empathy, rather than alientation, from women, and I think that can only be to the good.
p.s. i totally agree with nexyjo that it’s no fair if they wear socks. Either pantyhose or bare feet, both of which, paired with heels, provide their own special kind of discomfort.
Not really, Vanessa. I think that arguing “Using humor is inappropriate in response to serious situations!” does open the door to such a discussion. Because, then, is the Comedy Central benefit for autism education inappropriate? Or Comic Relief? Are there certain serious situations for which humor is inappropriate? Is it okay to use humor to raise money for medical research, but not for raising awareness about social problems? We’re all aware of the unspoken rule that there are some problems you can’t make jokes about, but does that mean that you can’t use humor about other things as a fundraising tool to combat these problems?
socks and heels are so in right now. seriously, i wear them w/ a short dress when im feeling cute. you guys just arent in the know
Vanessa and Maureen, you both make good points…. humor can be effective in combating societal ills. However, it’s the mocking tone with this in particular that I take issue with; the idea that men dressing up like women is always inherently funny because femme drag is in and of itself silly and undignified. Comedy Central raising money for autism education would be fine, because I highly suspect that no comedian is actually going to imitate autistic kids for laughs. But men imitating women, specifically how they dress? Like Ann said, it just has a trivializing/insulting effect (well, to me anyway). It’s really hard to determine what serious issues one should approach with humor, and you’re never going to get one unified reaction—this thread is a perfect example of that. But you know, I would hate to see EVERY social problem addressed only with a stern face and an earnest picket sign. (P.S. I hope my posts make sense… I’m extremely self-conscious about posting anywhere because my debilitating shyness exists even on the Internet. This is literally my second post on this site, as I usually remain a devoted lurker.)
you guys just arent in the know I would never dispute this fact, at least when it comes to myself. đ
The idea of men in heels is going to be received as absurd and comical, and I donât think they should be using humor (though, again, not their intent) to combat the issue of violence against women. I’ve got to dissent, too — there is absolutely nothing wrong with using humor to address social problems. In fact, it’s usually easier to win people over with humor than it is with seriousness, because you get under their defenses and really make them think about what they’re saying and what they believe. I guarantee you, more people paid attention to that march than would have if they’d only been carrying signs, because the high heels caught their attention, made them laugh, and made them think. Why is that bad?
I’m just saying that socks dull the pain somewhat. Although, I think I’d still break an ankle trying to walk in heels.
I’ve gotta say I’m somewhat shocked at how many intelligent people seem to have taken this march the wrong way. It’s called “Walk A Mile in Her Shoes”. To literally have men walk in women’s shoes to protest/think about rape/raise money is genius and i applaud whoever came up with the idea and organized it. These men aren’t in drag, they’re in shoes. Shoes that hinder women who are being assaulted, and shoes that symbolize so much about sexual roles and prejudices. There are protests every day with people carrying signs and most of those protests are overlooked. This one, however, has gotten attention because it’s unique and clever and forces the sex that commits the crime to think for a little while about the sex who are the victims of it. And if you think for a minute that every single step those excellent men took in Sherman Oaks wasn’t thinking about how different it is for women, then you’re completely missing the point. How anyone could be insulted by people taking time out of their weekend to care about someone else and try to help others is baffling to me. I’m proud that LAist Co-Editor Zach went to this march and reported on it for our blog, and I’m very happy that Feministe picked up on it. I strongly suggest that all the readers of this blog email their friends and family about this march because I would love to see more of these things take place around the country. Tony Pierce Editor, LAist
These men arenât in drag, theyâre in shoes. Shoes that hinder women who are being assaulted, and shoes that symbolize so much about sexual roles and prejudices. Is there actually any evidence that wearing a certain type of shoe makes a woman more likely to be assaulted, or less likely to escape unharmed if she is? Remember that a lot of sexual and/or violent assaults against women happen in the home, even if our culture does have this fetished idea of rape as something that happens to an attractive young woman in a short skirt and high heels. I’m happy to see anyone trying to raise awareness and raise money to help such a cause, however I’m not sure this was the best way to go about it. I’m not ‘insulted’, exactly…but it seems odd to me that men expect people to donate money in response to their doing a thing that many women do every day. Not only does no one hand over money to women who wear those shoes every day, but in many professional and social situations, it is positively expected that they will wear them uncomplainingly. A bit like the excessive praise that is given to men who make an effort to do some housework or childcare, while women who do the same work or more are taken for granted.
I think that men in women’s clothing is only mocking or insulting if the men, and the observers, think that being a woman is a shameful or ridiculous thing to be. After all, some of the best drag performers take their costuming very seriously and respect and identify with women – while remaining physically male and, in many cases, “living male” when not on stage. In this case, the men are obviously feminists, since they’re marching to protest violence against women. They probably have the highest respect for women, any woman watching them probably realizes that, and that really takes out any “mocking” aspect as far as I’m concerned. I like that they’ve taken one of the most painful and hindering parts of the patriarchally-imposed “female uniform” and used it symbolically to identify with women in other, more serious and harmful, aspects of female life.
If you don’t think heels are women-drag, you’ve got another thing coming. When those guys spend a day without their male privilege, THEN they’ll have walked a mile in my shoes.
Did they have onlookers shouting either “Hey baby!” or “Cunt!” while they were walking? I notice they retain their right to otherwise dress like shlubs and still get positive feedback. I’m not impressed.
Sure, those men are benefitting from male privilege even when they do something like this. As has been mentioned before, male privilege is very difficult to abdicate. Seriously, though, isn’t this exactly what people *should* do wiht male privilege? yes, it sucks that these men are taken more seriously than women would be– but *given* that they’re men, that they’re going to be taken seriously, isn’t using thier privilege to attract attention to the plight fo the less fortunate exactly what they ought to do? I’m hesitant to invoke the concept of [i] noblesse oblige [/i] but as long as there are classes that are born to power and influence, their responsibility is to use the influence on behalf of the disenfranchised, which is exactly what’s going on here.
Did they have onlookers shouting either âHey baby!â or âCunt!â while they were walking? I notice they retain their right to otherwise dress like shlubs and still get positive feedback. Iâm not impressed. Good thing impressing you wasn’t the purpose of the protest.
When those guys spend a day without their male privilege, THEN theyâll have walked a mile in my shoes. So they can take their dirty filthy money and donate it somewhere other than the rape crisis center, because the rape crisis center has all the funding it needs? Seriously, there’s having an ideological stance, and then there’s cutting off your nose to spite your face. I’m sure it will keep you all warm and fuzzy if no men donate money to the Valley Trauma Center, but it’s kind of hard on all of the women who won’t get services.
Uh..those aren’t the only two choices… They can still donate the money, even if they aren’t having a cute protest in shoes. Maybe they could dress in full drag?
Did they have onlookers shouting either âHey baby!â or âCunt!â while they were walking? Well, I’d be surprised if a few people didn’t shout “fag!”
I agree with the people that think this is weird. It feels like a mockery of women. I mean, I’m a woman, and I NEVER wear heels, so they sure aren’t walking a mile in MY shoes. Also-what does high heels have to do with rape? Other than heels making it hard to run away from an attacker? And how does walking in high heels make a man feel at all like a woman who has the constant threat of rape hanging over her head? I don’t get it. I appreciate men getting out there and protesting and raising money. I just don’t know why they have to make a big joke out of it. Oh silly little women and their high heels, ha ha ha! Let’s get a bunch of men and put them in heels, it’ll be so great! I mean-what statement are they trying to make? My guess is they did this to get media coverage. Which only says sad things about the media’s unwillingness to cover “serious issues.” And about the organizers being willing to sell out in order to get coverage. Bleh.
Uh..those arenât the only two choices⌠They can still donate the money, even if they arenât having a cute protest in shoes. It’s a fundraiser — they get pledges for money based on the walk. Yes, they could do something more politically correct, like run a 5K, but then you’d have people complaining about how it’s not really saying anything about women’s issues to have something as generic as a 5K. What’s coming across here is that some people are upset that men are trying to do something to raise awareness about rape. What’s up with that? Are men supposed to pretend that rape doesn’t exist? I sometimes wonder where the stereotype of the humorless feminist comes from, and then something like this comes up and I go, “Oh, yeah, right. Now I remember.”
My guess is they did this to get media coverage. Which only says sad things about the mediaâs unwillingness to cover âserious issues.â And about the organizers being willing to sell out in order to get coverage. Yeah, how dare they try to get coverage of women’s issues and draw attention to the problem of rape? And they might get media coverage — the horror! Really, these guys should just slink home, crack a beer, and forget all about the day they decided that women’s issues were important to all people.
Nice dramatic posts there Mnemosyne. Hah. I don’t see how this raised attention about rape-all I’ve seen is “men in high heels!!!! Aren’t they SO f’in great??!! Wow, what HEROS these men are!!!” No one is upset that men “are trying to do something to raise awareness about rape.” We are upset about the WAY they are trying to raise awareness. It’s just nonsensical to me. Oh, and yeah, I think that most men DO just pretend rape doesn’t exist. I don’t know how walking around in high heels shows that they have an understanding about rape though. Do you?
Buggle– you’re upset about the WAY the men are doing it…. because they’re doing it the effective way. That’s pretty much the same as being upset that they do it at all.
Malachi- Here’s the problem. I don’t think what they’re doing is effective. Yeah, so it raises a few bucks for rape crisis center. That’s nice. But it’s more like sticking a pretty pink bandage on a gaping chest wound. I would have been happier if the walk had ended at the local statehouse, so that the participants and the legislators could have a discussion about the seriousness of rape, and legal ways to increase convictions. If there was a forum that discussed the fact that victims of rape are unnecessarily demonized and not believed. Maybe if one of the guys had a sign on him that said, “Women have their own 9/11 every three years.” If there was a discussion on stalker laws, and ways to strengthen them. Or a budgetary discussion with said legislators on directing more funding to women’s health centers to supplement the money raised at the event. They even had a catchy phrase all lined up- “I walked the walk, Can you?” But instead, a bunch of guys threw on some hokey shoes, walked, raised a little money, and in the process, nicely equated rape with shoes, i.e. appearance. So, yeah, lump me in with the humorless feminists.
[blockquote] But instead, a bunch of guys threw on some hokey shoes, walked, raised a little money, and in the process, nicely equated rape with shoes, i.e. appearance. [/blockquote] I don’t understand how it’s possible to have a [i] parade [/i] that’s not about appearance. Buggle complains, above, that the men are doing this just to gain media coverage, and that the media is shallow for covering this. Sarah, above, complained that the men are getting too much praise and attention, because it’s more than a woman would get. In other words, they’re unhappy not because the march isn’t working, but because it’s working [i] too well] [/i]
From my favorite humorless feminist: Letâs face it. Subsistence as a subhuman member of the sex class has exceedingly little to do with sauntering through town in uncomfortable shoes. In fact, when oneâs oppressors don a symbol of oneâs oppression and parade hither and yon for an afternoonâs diversion, itâs about as âawarenessâ-raising as if a bunch of honkys went around doing watermelon jokes in blackface to send âurbanâ kids to basketball camp. http://blog.iblamethepatriarchy.com/2006/10/30/obviously-they-cant-even-walk-the-walk/ Humor, that’s it. Hey, maybe Hooters will sponsor the walk next year.
Ha-Frumious-so right about Hooters. And we “humorless feminists” better not complain-because look at all the media coverage it’ll get!! Woo hoooo!!! I agree with Kristin-I’m not sure how effective this is. Did it raise money? Yep-and that’s great, of course. Did it raise consciousness? I doubt it. No one answered my question about what high heels have to do with rape anyways? How are they related? ANd yes, humor is definitely the MOST IMPORTANT thing in feminism. Hee. How can we change the world if we can’t laugh at our own oppression?