I’m saving that picture, and definitely gonna share it. The politics of “the number” are exhausting, and it never works out well for women. When I was younger, people often asked me about mine (number); something about being married and on the cusp of middle age, people aren’t as interested. I suspect that’s a good thing.
Doesn’t this a need linear representation? Like, a line representing men going from lower right to upper left, and upper right to lower left for women? Then you can have the intersecting point where public approval is the same for both. I peg that around five.
Yeah, it does. But is it really linear? Does male social approval go up more between 10 and 20 partners than between 20 and 30? Or less? Someone needs to do a study.
A friend of mine likes to quote the movie American Pie, something like, “When a woman tells you how many men she’s slept with, add two. When a man tells you how many women he’s slept with, divide by three.”
The15th, good point. Heck, it probably flattens out and then at some point it probably begins to drop. So it’ll be more bell-curved, I guess.
The whole reputation thing is so high school. People like to get laid. So what. If there is a serious conversation about birth control then I welcome it. The whole who’s sleep with who thing is lame. These are the people that were fascinated when Ben Affleck and J-Lo were together.
Doesn’t this a need linear representation? Like, a line representing men going from lower left to upper right, and upper left to lower right for women? That seems like a supply and demand curve.
The sluts/studs thing isn’t necessarily a male/female thing, it just normally works out that way because of the dynamic of male/female relationships. By that I mean, the criteria is more about percentage than strict numbers and selectiveness (or lack thereof) is often seen as the key factor. To frame it in celebrity terms, Scarlett Johansson for instance is, by all accounts, promiscuous but I don’t recall her ever being labelled as a slut because she seems to take the active role and is selective about her partners, same thing with Angelina Jolie. Britney Spears, on the other hand, is often portrayed as a slut depsite having almost certainly slept with far less people. The difference is that more of her partners have been obvious losers so it looks as if her standards are low enough to sleep with just about anyone. Anyway, gender dynamics. The reason women are labelled in a more negative way for having multiple partners is because it’s expected by society that they’ll take the passive role while it’s up to the man to prove himself. Thus, his conquests are seen as challenges that have been overcome, while she’s seen as having submitted to his wiles. Once everyone gets on board with the fact that women like sex as well, are entitled to do so AND to pursue their enjoyment on their own terms, this’ll all be seen as a quaint throwback and rightly so.
When I was in college, a “stud” was any guy who we believed had had sex with a number of women that exceeded his age. Given that we were scruffy little ones, that wasn’t impressive. Then I got to grad school, and had a seminar buddy who once remarked that real experience didn’t kick in until the number exceeded one’s IQ.
I am still famous in some circles as being the girl who took the virginity of my first boyfriend, whose “number” now reportedly exceeds a hundred, spanning both genders. If you live in Worcester, MA, you’ve probably slept with him. 😉
Then I got to grad school, and had a seminar buddy who once remarked that real experience didn’t kick in until the number exceeded one’s IQ. Damn. I better get to work on that.
I just saw Mr. and Mrs. Smith, and I laughed my ass off at the number conversation they had. (I missed most of the rest of the movie due to my eyes being pointed at the ceiling due to continuous rolling.) For those who haven’t seen it, they discuss how many people they’ve killed, Jolie’s number is higher, and Pitt has a hard time dealing with it.
I’ve learned to disregard the whole “number” issue for two main reasons: 1. First and foremost, it’s really none of my business 2. Given my own history, I can say with a high level of confidence that the majority of women with whom I would engage in any kind of sexual relationship have higher “numbers” than me. So to make it an issue would do nothing but cause needless mental anguish. I’ve got more important things to worry about.
Hmph, anytime someone asks me what my number is I just look at them and ask “Does that include unwillingly?” It usually takes them a minute to process it, but after they do, they back off really quickly.
Ever since I learned to actually understand algebra and physics-math, I’ve started answering the “number question” with pi (3.14159265) or phi (1.6180339887) or theta (the angle which determines sine and cosine in trig) or mu (friction coefficient) or some other irrational number. This never fails to stop the conversation cold AND make the questioner look like the prying idiot they are. College has turned me into a math geek….
There’s a bunch of other feminist (and liberal too) image cards in that blog. I happened to have no mental strength to do any work the other day, and then found that link and then looked at the entire archive. Seriously, look in there people. Many of them are priceless. – http://indexed.blogspot.com/2006/09/make-up-cant-cover-ambition.html – http://indexed.blogspot.com/2006/10/or-extra-year-in-retirement.html – http://indexed.blogspot.com/2006/11/i-found-jesus-hiding-in-some.html – http://indexed.blogspot.com/2006/12/lame-duck-and-cover.html – http://indexed.blogspot.com/2007/01/classless.html