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It Would Be The Best Episode of Being Bobby Brown EVER!

zuzu

Get this: Osama bin Laden has a major crush on Whitney Houston, and he’s talked about killing Bobby Brown to get him out of the way.

Supposedly, bin Laden has a “paramount desire” for Houston booty, though he’s conflicted due to his hatred of music in general and syrupy, bombastic pop ballads in particular (OK, we’re projecting). Osama also seemed willing to break his “color rule” for Houston and make her an official wife. To accomplish this, the al Qaeda leader even contemplated a hit on Houston’s husband Bobby Brown. Such dramatics, considering all he needs to tempt her to his harem is a nice fat bag of crack.

Maybe that shoe really *was* following Bobby.

10 thoughts on It Would Be The Best Episode of Being Bobby Brown EVER!

  2. The links at the top of the previous post:

    « Why You Should Marry a Doormat*It Would Be The Best Episode of Being Bobby Brown EVER! »

    hee.

  3. Bizarre story.

    This comment from the Daily Mail link you posted:

    I cannot help but think that if only Mr Laden had not been exposed to the horrors of American television – the violent excesses of ‘Miami Vice’ and the irresponsible handbook of bomb-making that is ‘MacGyver’ – perhaps he would have become a quite diiferent man. A lawyer, perhaps, or a bee keeper.

    – Peter Fyle, Poole, Dorset

    Gawd, I love the British sense of humour.

  4. Man, I don’t care if that’s true, it’s the best thing ever.

    That’s the greatest window into Osama’s mind that we could ever dream of.

  5. But would Osama literally give her a hand with poo?

    Only Bobby loves her enough to extract her dootie bubbles.

  6. The poo thing is totally lost on me guys. But anyway.

    I’d love to see Osama and Whitney fightin’ out over who’s boss. Now that would be good.

  7. The poo thing is totally lost on me guys.

    Oh, god. They were talking in an interview about love and the kinds of things you do for love, and one of them said that Bobby had actually reached up into Whitney’s ass when she was constipated and retrieved the poo, and Whitney said, “That’s love. That’s black love.”

    Black people the world over were horrified.

  10. HA HA HA HA!

    Oh but for the love of a constipated, crack addict, OBL could have been a “nice guy”.

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