Seems the Converts’ Zeal thread has attracted one of the “contraceptive mentality” types who can’t seem to see any value whatsoever in the Vatican’s recent tentative moves to recognize that maybe their absolutely-no-condom policy is harmful to people in countries ravaged by AIDS. Seems Tony can’t quite believe that there could be any value whatsoever to relaxing the Church’s position on condoms where one spouse has AIDS or HIV; he feels that the spouses should just suck it up and never have sex again.
But, via Qusan at State of the Qusan, here’s an example of why that might not work out so well in practice:
Kenyan women’s rights activists have condemned an MP who told parliament that women usually say “No” to sex, even if they mean “Yes”.
During a debate on a new sex crimes law, Paddy Ahenda said Kenya women were too shy to openly say “Yes” and warned the law could prevent marriage.
Twelve of Kenya’s 18 female MPs walked out in protest, saying Mr Ahenda and other MPs were “trivialising” rape.
Many Kenyans are alarmed by a huge rise in the incidence of sexual abuse.
“This is a nation that should be in shame because its leaders are laughing at offences committed against women and children,” said Kenya National Commission on Human Rights official Catherine Mumma.
‘Impediment to marriage’
Several male MPs feared that the bill went too far and could lead to a spate of false accusations by women. *
“If the bill is adopted the way it is, it will prevent men from courting women and this will be a serious impediment to the young who would want to marry,” said Mr Ahenda.
“In our culture, when women say ‘No’, they mean ‘Yes’ unless it’s a prostitute.”
The AFP news agency reports that many of his male colleagues laughed and applauded his comments.
So here we have an example of a culture in which women aren’t really going to have the option of nobly foregoing sex with their husbands lest they fall prey to a “contraceptive mentality.” Oh, no — this is a culture where forced sex is considered “courting,” because “no” really means “yes,” so even if she refuses, there’s no such thing as rape, because of course, of course she really meant yes!
Erm, unless she’s a prostitute. Which means, apparently, that she can mean no when she says it. I’m still trying to figure that one out.
But back to this condom thing. The Catholic Church is an enormously powerful institution and has its hands in all kinds of relief organizations serving the countries and continents most affected by AIDS. Yet until recently, they wouldn’t even entertain the thought that condoms could have any value in prevention, so they stood in the way of AIDS education that promoted condom use. As a result, you have a lot of women in countries with fucked-up attitudes like those on display in the Kenyan Parliament at the mercy of men who view them as property. Women are expected to be pure, but men can fuck whomever they please — which means that even good girls who remained pure until their wedding nights and faithful to their husbands are contracting AIDS from those very husbands — who visit prostitutes with impunity. And without any contraception, these women are also getting pregnant and passing HIV to their children.
Outside of abstinence, condoms are the single most effective form of AIDS prevention available. Comprehensive AIDS education that takes into account cultural taboos and the disparity of power between men and women can be effective in controlling the spread of the disease (Thailand, for instance, home to a large sex-tourism industry, has had success in doing so). It is enormously damaging to the very populations the Church is trying to assist with poverty relief, vaccinations and sanitation programs to discourage the use of the one truly effective weapon against uncontrolled HIV infection.
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* This doesn’t really have anything to do directly with the subject of the post; I just wanted to highlight this as a perfect example of the whole “those lying sluts” phenomenon. If we acknowledge that women have autonomy and can say no, if we then make it a crime to violate that autonomy by forcing a woman to have sex against her will, men will be the real victims because women will falsely accuse them of rape. So, better not make rape a crime, then.