Shameless Self-Promotion Sunday February 9, 2014 Jill Promote yourself. Netiquette reminders: Want to recommend someone else’s writing instead? Try the weekly signal-boosting thread. we expect Content Notes as a courtesy to our readers for problematic content in linked posts and/or their comment threads (a habit of posting only triggering/disparaging links may annoy the Giraffe (you really don’t want to annoy the Giraffe)) extended discussion of self-promotion links on this thread is counter-productive for the intended signal-boosting – the idea is for the promoted sites to get more traffic. If it’s a side-discussion that would be off-topic/unwelcome/distressing on the other site, take it to #spillover after leaving a note on this thread redirecting others there.
Is Mike Huckabee Against Pre-Natal Care? “Space your children,” the Liberian midwife told me. How did family planning–once modern and responsible– become a fight about uncontrolled libido and ‘Uncle Sugar’?
I wrote a post examining attitudes towards survivors of sexual abuse, and disclosing that I, too, am a survivor. Trigger warning – I believe her. Because it happened to me too :http://www.gappytales.com/2014/02/i-believe-her-because-it-happened-to-me-too.html
Talking about music, feminism, books and celebrating galentine’s day with my girl idols this week on 😀
This week I wrote about the ways that being single on Valentine’s Day is either presented as a tragedy or as a chance to be a sassy, fabulous single girl, and how neither of those views is very helpful. I also took some time to do some navel-gazing about the implication of being a feminist blogger. I don’t think I’ve come to any useful conclusions, but it’s something I’m constantly thinking about.
Loved that, especially this line: But their reassuring, slightly condescending tone gets my hackles up, as does the fact that, by telling us how great it can be to be single on Valentine’s Day, they’re pretty much reinforcing the ways that culture says it’s not. There is nothing that makes me roll my eyes harder than people/writers who think it’s really helpful to do this in all kinds of contexts. Someone was telling me a while back about how near-strangers felt the need to tell her “I think you look great” after she gained some weight following a surgery.
I got a hair cut last week, and I mused about how women are treated differently with short hair vs long hair. Why is short hair considered more masculine and long hair more feminine.
Human with uterus is back in saddle with posts on women’s rights to refuse procedures in OBGYN care and the debate over homebirth safety. http://humanwithuterus.wordpress.com/
I wrote about: Climate change is not a white, middle-class issue: on narratives and the need to build bridges. Clothing swaps are the best – about two plus size swap I attended in one weekend. This is the world we live in – about how hard it is to work toward a better world while living in this one.
Over at delagar, I write about a SF reviewer who ranks his top reads of the year — all male — and, upon being queried as to why no women, notes that he just hasn’t read any girls that year. Or last year either. “Where Have You Gone, Joanna Russ?” Also, this post, about a conversation with my kid: Actual Conversation in the Delagar Household.
I never know how to feel about these things. I mean obviously, there’s a huge problem with female representation in SF, but if you asked me to rank my top 50 SF books/short stories, you’d get almost all dudes as well- and I say this as someone who actually does make an active effort to find non-white-dude material to read. I’m not sure the problem is with the reviewer, who I take at his word when he says he’s pulling books off shelves without regard to gender, but with the fact so few women are able to break into the SF market in the first place. I mean, it obviously is circular- if more people bought the work of female authors, it’d be easier for female authors to become successful- so it’s not as simple as “our choices aren’t political, just blame the big publishers.” But at the same time, if all we’re doing is looking at the work that already exists, I think the depressing reality is that reading nothing but works by dudes for a year is statistically unsurprising and probably doesn’t reflect any sexism- except insofar as it reflects a choice not to specifically search for books by women. Hopefully I’m expressing myself clearly.
I don’t want to derail this thread, but if you follow the links, this very question is discussed, and rebutted, at Tobler’s site.
Is this thread not an appropriate place to discuss the links posted? If so, I’m happy to go to Spillover, but I didn’t understand that. In any case, I did follow the links, but there was no rebuttal- the post’s author was talking about books by female authors in general, not SF, which has a way lower ratio of female-to-male authors than usual (which is part of the problem I was talking about).
ldouglas, the point of our self-promotion and signal boosting threads is to direct traffic to the blogs being linked – having the discussion here defeats the purpose (and if one discusses just a synopsis here rather than even read the OP, then doubly defeats the purpose). This is noted in the post Netiquette guidelines above, btw. We have also noticed that as soon as long discussions start happening on these threads, other people stop posting links, presumably because they perceive them to be getting lost in noise. Discussions here on an Open Thread or Spillover (use your judgement) instead are OK if people have Reasons for not commenting on a linked article directly, but unless it’s a Thread of Doom on the original article it’s mostly better to reward the author by leaving a comment on their site, where it will contribute directly to their feedback and discussion.
Today my blog has an article [Content Note added by moderator: Ableist language] on Dating (living with) a Nut Case. I thought it was pretty interesting. What some people will do to not be alone. Ugh.
I think it’s really great that you’re providing support for people in emotionally abusive relationships, but I do wish you’d be a little more careful with using terms about mental illness so casually. Being abusive and being a “nutcase,” “psycho,” “bi-polar,” or “crazy” aren’t the same thing, at all. And if we’re talking about actual psychopathy, then your list doesn’t quite work- it’s more a checklist of generally abusive indicators, or things that psychopaths do in movies/TV shows. Anyways, I really don’t want to discourage you from trying to help people recognize when they’re in bad relationships- I think that’s important, valuable work. But please do think about the language you use- especially since some of the most vulnerable people to abuse have mental illnesses themselves!
Most people with mental illnesses are not actually assholes. Many assholes would pass a psychiatric assessment with flying colours.
Last week at Bitch Flicks… Call for Writers: Women and Work/Labor Issues Women’s Bodies in the Oscar-Nominated Films Seed & Spark: Dandie and Me On Loving ‘Her’ … and Why It’s Not Easy Interview with Athena Film Festival Co-Founders Kathryn Kolbert and Melissa Silverstein Cute Old Ladies Who Talk Dirty in ‘Nebraska’ and ‘Philomena’ A Study of a Singular Woman: A Review of ‘White Material’ Bourgie White People Problems and Fat Shaming in ‘Enough Said’ ‘Battlestar Galactica’: The Show Where All of the Women Die Racebending and the Academy Awards: Get Ready to Cringe Why We Need to Stop Worshiping the Elusive Heteroflexible Femme The Life and Art of Mercedes Sosa Seed & Spark: Go Big or Go Home Becky, Adelaide, and Nan: Women with Down Syndrome on ‘Glee’ and ‘American Horror Story’
Hey ldouglas, Appreciate your comments. In my mind, nutcases are “sane” people who behave badly. Not my intent to disparage those who suffer mental illness. Yes, and to be sure, a psychopath can have a mental health diagnosis. I’m also fairly certain, he/she will point this out as he/she continues to be abusive and manipulative. Also Dating a Nutcase, however politically incorrect, will draw more readership than Dating an Abuser. IMO. I thinks it’s a terrific article.
Also Dating a Nutcase, however politically incorrect, will draw more readership than Dating an Abuser. This is the crux of what I have a problem with. It’s not just ‘politically incorrect,’ it’s further stigmatizing an already-stigmatized group of people. I get that you define “nutcases [as] sane people who behave badly” but that’s not what the word means in common parlance; it’s very specifically used as an indicator of mental illness. Yes, and to be sure, a psychopath can have a mental health diagnosis. I’m also fairly certain, he/she will point this out as he/she continues to be abusive and manipulative. I think you’re missing my point. Mental illness isn’t an excuse to be abusive, but it’s also not a synonym for abusiveness; IPV can happen with or without mental illness. When you substitute the term ‘nutcase’ for the term ‘abuser,’ what you’re saying is that someone being abusive is a sign of mental illness, which, again, stigmatizes people with mental health problems. Frankly, it also lets abusers off the hook to suggest they’re not making a choice to commit IPV, they ‘just have a mental disorder.’
“but that’s not what the word means in common parlance; it’s very specifically used as an indicator of mental illness.” When someone is “nuts, a nutcase, crazy” it more commonly means someone is acting stupid, out of line, etc. Mentally ill? Not where I’m from.
Educate yourself, please. http://disabledfeminists.com/2010/05/17/guest-post-from-rmj-ableist-word-profile-crazy/
As someone with bipolar disorder, I’m not real fond of the way psychopath is bandied about or the equation of mental illness with abusive jerk. I can roll with “nutjob” but when someone uses it, I don’t give them much credibility for critical analysis or compassion. When it is used as link bait along with a disparaging reference to political correctness, I suspect the whole thing. At least put up a content note in your original comment that you are going to disparage entire swathes of people to get them to read your post. And no I don’t think it is helpful to women. But then I’m just a nutjob.
I never thought I’d talk about maggots on the blog, but in recent weeks, Googlers wondering about rumors of a “new STD” that causes maggots kept finding their way there, so I thought I’d put their minds at ease. Although I can’t find any reason for you to freak out about maggots in your nether regions, you’ll still learn a thing or two from this article, so check it out! * * * Also, if you’re in Arizona, you might be especially interested in this Q&A with Jodi Liggett, Planned Parenthood Arizona’s new director of public policy! She talks about the sex education controversy in Tempe, the importance of voting in this year’s midterm elections, and her wish list for a more female-friendly Arizona!
A feminist friend of mine has a daughter who wants to wear short shorts that show her butt cheeks. Her mom doesn’t like it because she feels that it objectifies her. But her daughter says she’s a feminist and feels women should be able to choose to do whatever they want. What do you all think about this? One of my students tackles this question: Do Women Buy Into Objectification? Another student talks about the damage sexual abuse has done to one of her friends Rapists Don’t Know Damage They Do
New this week at Scarleteen, Heather publishes a completely revamped version of our central piece on reproduction, Human Reproduction: A Seafarer’s Guide, a swashbuckling tale of sperm and ova with detailed answers to some FAQs, all illustrated by the fabulous and talented Isabella Rotman. Mo and Sam offer suggestions and advice on considerate community living while still having a rewarding sex life in How Can I Navigate a Sexual Relationship in a Dorm Without Alarming My Neighbors?.
A bonus extra from Scarleteen! Wanted to show Valentine’s appreciation to a someone, a Someone, or several Someones, but haven’t found a suitable card? Check out Scarleteen’s snazzy range of Valentine’s e-cards by Isabella Rotman, catering to most of the different possible relationships you could think of, including encouraging yourself or a friend to love their own good self. The e-cards are also part of Scarleteen’s donation drive. Scarleteen serves thousands of young people in direct service each year, and thousands upon thousands via our extensive static content, all on a very low budget and with no public funding. So, if you’d like to and are able to support comprehensive, feminist sex education, please consider making a donation. – Redskies, Scarleteen Volunteer
I channeled my outrage after hearing that Sheryl Sandberg’s Lean In organization praised one of my least favorite members of Congress, the hawkish, anti-choice Ileana Ros-Lehtinen. I also highlighted the trial of the killer of Jordan Davis, a white man using a Stand Your Ground defense after shooting an unarmed black teenager. The trial started around what would have been Trayvon Martin’s 19th birthday. On a happier note, last week marked the 101st anniversary of Rosa Parks’ birth, an opportunity to remember her amazing anti-rape activism.
On platitudes vs. policy when it comes to women and politics, in response to the Lean In Foundation honoring Congresswoman Ileana Ros-Lehtinen – who opposes equal pay laws. Also, Sandra Fluke running for office is a reproductive rights win.
Why I Call Myself A Feminist. I am a feminist. I am both passionate & ambivalent about this label. Hints Of My Transgender Childhood. I wanted to find the proof, the sign, the memory. I wanted to know I’d been trans my whole life.
Content Notes – homophobia, fat shaming, body shaming, mental health slurs, class privilege. As part of the #CheersToSochi effort, I took a closer look at how the anti-LGBTQ violence in Russia impacts the NBC soap, Days of Our Lives. To prove my point, I also took a look at General Hospital. Both shows have prominent gay storylines (about gay men.) Two other women told me to “calm down” because (I think) they didn’t like my questions. It really got me down. Something for you – my friends. We are giving away 5 copies of the debut EP from Mary Lambert of “She Keeps Me Warm” fame. Anyone in the US can enter so please do – its a great EP. And finally my embarrassment over the rash of “fitness win” posts I shared in 2010 – and why it was such a clusterf*ck
Are picture books cultivating consumerism in kids? A new study says yes: http://humaneeducation.org/blog/2014/02/03/picture-books-cultivating-consumerism-kids-study/
Hello all! I recently started my blog (as of two weeks ago)… This week, I offered my take on why our culture is so obsessed with the corruption-filled plot lines of Scandal or House of Cards…Is this movement actually part of a rising awareness of the need for greater equality? Also…The horror of the George Zimmerman “Celebrity” match and our culture of violence that legitimizes it… Improper Sex Education in America and what that has to do with the #Cookiecott of 2014… And lots more! Check me out if you’d like!
Here’s what’s going on at House of Flout! In Response to Rohin Guha’s Jezebel article about “the Myth of the Fag Hag”: “How NOT to Write about Inequality” Trigger Warning for this next one — it is a rape survivor’s story. Other triggers: depression, anxiety, eating disorders. “Grief After Rape: A Survivor’s Story“
Young Feminists & Allies are selling feminist Valentine’s Day cards to raise funds to send members to this year’s WOC National NOW Conference. The cards are designed by NYC based graphic designer, Jenn-O. Buy one for only $1.77 and spread the word! https://www.etsy.com/shop/NOWYoungFems
This week on the blog, I wrote about how I’ve cultivated safe spaces over the past year, amongst like-minded women: http://t.co/Rre0QsnzOK
This is finally getting some national attention. PLEASE continue to spread the word. They are such scumbags, really, you have no idea what we deal with around here. They think they can do any goddamn thing they please, and up till now, they have. Bob Jones University cancels sexual abuse investigation–why? http://daisysdeadair.blogspot.com/2014/02/bob-jones-university-cancels-sexual.html