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Romney is the President

Jill

Of angry white men:

Until now, Republicans and Fox News have excelled at conjuring alternate realities. But this time, they made the mistake of believing their fake world actually existed. As Fox’s Megyn Kelly said to Karl Rove on election night, when he argued against calling Ohio for Obama: “Is this just math that you do as a Republican to make yourself feel better?”

Romney and Tea Party loonies dismissed half the country as chattel and moochers who did not belong in their “traditional” America. But the more they insulted the president with birther cracks, the more they tried to force chastity belts on women, and the more they made Hispanics, blacks and gays feel like the help, the more these groups burned to prove that, knitted together, they could give the dead-enders of white male domination the boot.

The election about the economy also sounded the death knell for the Republican culture wars.

76 thoughts on Romney is the President

  1. “Is this just math that you do as a Republican to make yourself feel better?”

    This has the to the absolute best line from the punditry on election night.

    Well, maybe second to Barack Obama re-elected President of the United States.

    1. Did you see the clip? They showed it on the Daily Show the next night (which is how I get my news about Fox News because I like my brain cells alive, thx). She ended up running over to the guys that had called Ohio for Fox and was like, “Is there any way this is a fuck up?” and they were like, “Sure… like 0.05% chance.”

      1. I actually watched it in real time, because I was curious to see if FoxNews was calling it for Obama like the other networks were. It was some pretty surreal tv, watching Karl Rove try and spin and massage the Ohio numbers and then watching Megyn Kelly walk on over to the number crunchers to get to the bottom of things. You could totally tell that Rove was thinking, but I spent tens of millions of dollars in Ohio trying to throw the results there, how is this possible?!?!

        Stewart’s take on the whole thing the following night was pretty hilarious. He nailed it, as always.

        1. I can’t bring myself to watch Fox News, but I’m always kind of jealous when people are like, “And I was there. And I had all the lulz.” I was watching MSNBC and bawling like an infant, haha.

        2. It was actually a bucket of lulz, too! What with Karl Rove and his wide eyed bewilderment, and Megyn Kelly tottering around on her ridiculously hight heels in search of the real truth(!) all while Bret Baier kept up with his bad impression of a Ken Doll.

          I usually can’t bear to watch the FN, either. I was totally like half squinting and getting ready to switch back to CNN quickly because I assumed it would be pretty ridiculous. Apparently, I had just missed the Donald making his cameo appearance. Soooo disappointing!

        3. Is Bret Baier the guy on Fox who overdosed on spraytan? Even though my father voted Democrat this election, he had Fox on for news November 6… my mother, meanwhile, was watching Jon Stewart’s coverage in another room 🙂

        5. Yup, lots of lulz were had. I’m pretty happy my husband turned it to Faux despite my vehement protests b/c it was pretty hilarious, as was the real time commentary from my liberal friends on FB (all the repubs were silent, which makes me chuckle with glee). Mostly I hate watching FN b/c it raises my blood pressure. And it makes me feel like any minute I am going to be dealing with armed crazies trying to start a revolution.

  4. The GOP is not the white man’s party, since most gays tend to be well off white men. It’s the straight old white man’s party. And IMO has become a minority party and is fading. I’m a registered Independent. I think the GOP will be swept out of the House in 2014 and we will have one party rule, analogous to the former Soviet Union.

    1. most gays tend to be well off white men

      …
      and are divided up into trucker dudes and fashion guys?

      seriously, WTF?

    2. I think the GOP will be swept out of the House in 2014 and we will have one party rule, analogous to the former Soviet Union.

      Yeah, I’m pretty sure that’s just how it happened in the USSR.

    5. I was going to say you went of the rails here:

      It’s the straight old white man’s party

      but then you wrote this:

      we will have one party rule, analogous to the former Soviet Union.

      1. “I was going to say you went of the rails here:”

        How so? There are no gays welcome in the GOP. Just straight old white men. The MSM keeps saying this over and over.

    8. there are men who are gay that are not on board with the plight check the log cabin republicans for instance just as there are workers who are white and straight men who are down with the cause. Some men are afraid of the fact that equality means giving up some perks.

  5. MoDo has been….strange…in her coverage of this election. This piece was at least on the nose, but her election columns seemed to amount to “Waaa, Obama is an introvert and he doesn’t LIKE us like Bill Clinton did and I thought he would be like Clinton and WHY ISNT HE???”

    Her last column had this gem:
    “It is clear now that we elected an introvert, which is strange, and a leader who is depleted, rather than recharged, by politics and crowds. As Neera Tanden, president of the Center for American Progress and a former Obama adviser, told New York magazine: “It’s stunning that he’s in politics, because he really doesn’t like people. My analogy is that it’s like becoming Bill Gates without liking computers.” “

    1. I really hate Maureen Dowd. Her politics are, I suppose, fairly similar to my politics, so from time to time she says things I happen to agree with, but her tendency to make broad, unfounded assertions for the sake of a particularly unfunny humor drives me nuts.

      2. “I really hate Maureen Dowd. Her politics are, I suppose, fairly similar to my politics, so from time to time she says things I happen to agree with, ”

        You hate someone you agree with? How do you feel about those you disagree with?

        2. “but her tendency to make broad, unfounded assertions for the sake of a particularly unfunny humor drives me nuts.”

          Duh!

    2. Pfft, obviously if you’re introverted you can’t care about other people. Introverts are all angry hermits who demand you answer their riddles before you can cross their bridge. I know, as an introvert myself, I just hiss and skulk away from people and in no way am passionate about human rights or the state of my country.

      1. Aside from which, Obama isn’t an introvert. I don’t think anyone could be and still pull off these campaigns. He’s just slightly less extroverted than your average pol.

        1. I’ve heard him speak- he’s clearly an extrovert who’s energized by crowds. Probably he just wants to get some time out of the fishbowl, or maybe he’s just avoiding douchebag aides. Dunno, but it’s absolutely absurd to call him an introvert.

    3. Yeah, this is ridiculous.

      I joke that I hate people, and it’s true that as I’ve gotten older I am actually less willing to interact with people if I don’t have to, but I have considered going into politics because I do care, profoundly, about people in general and their well being, and I think politics is one of the most powerful tools we have to make lives better, or worse, for large numbers of people at a time.

      Also, you can be very, very low on the introvert or extrovert side — basically, practically in the middle between the two — and you will as a result be energized by crowds some of the time, and drained by them at other times. And, crowds aren’t people. Admittedly, politics requires a level of individual schmoozing with folks that would drive a dump truck full of my spoons to the bank of the river and pour them all in, but I do, in fact, enjoy being in front of *crowds*. I should have been a professor; I love to give lectures and speeches. It’s the more one-on-one interactions, particularly large numbers of one-on-one interactions as happens during a party, that drain me.

      Obama’s probably a low extrovert, maybe a low introvert. My husband is like that. He claims to be introverted, and it’s true that he has a great deal of tolerance for solitary hyperfocus on work activities, and does not go out and acquire metric shit-tons of friends… but he enjoys networking events and needs to surround himself with friends and family *most* of the time. (He also wants to be president someday, but he’s an albino so it’s never going to happen… he looks horrible on camera, and Americans are sufficiently shallow that that’s going to matter.) I think a lot of politicians are low extroverts or low introverts, actually; Howard Dean was governor of Vermont for many years and ran for president, but he’s not a high extrovert.

    4. “It is clear now that we elected an introvert, which is strange, and a leader who is depleted, rather than recharged, by politics and crowds.

      You know, even aside from everything else, I really should point out that I’m a hopeless introvert, but I’m actually pretty energised by public speaking/presentations. Even the time in my life when I really, really WASN’T it was because of my anxiety, not my introversion. I can’t handle parties or social events easily, but impersonal groups like conferences? Easy peasy, and really revitalising to boot.

      1. Yup. My social anxiety is inversely proportionate to my audience size. 1,000 people? Yaaaaaaay! 1 person? AAUUUGHHH.

        Smaller audience = more intimate.

  7. “The election about the economy also sounded the death knell for the Republican culture wars.”

    It’s certainly an important step, but “death knell” seems premature. The far Right is tenacious about the culture war.

    1. I can’t remember how many times the media has said that the culture wars are done. 1992 and 2008, off the top of my head. The media also insisted that the Republican sweep of 2010 had nothing to do with culture wars and was all about taxes.

      Oops.

      This is something which makes the Beltway types feel better.

      1. Actually romney won among white woman 56-42.A better performance than four years ago.So you believe democrats dont need a majority of white womens vote

        3. Liberals (well, Democrats, actually) don’t need to rethink and change their strategy because we won. What do Democrats need more white women’s votes for? Winning harder? Republicans are the ones who need more votes, as evidenced by them not having enough votes to win.

      2. Actually obama won because he got large percent of non white woman.For example black women voted for obama 96-3

        1. This is to Rhoanna, b/c I can’t reply directly to her. Your comment made me laugh out loud–“winning harder.” Hahahahahahaha….that’s awesome.

          I also love how certain people act like Obama only won b/c ya know “all those brown people.” Yup, no white people at all voted for him. Just brown people…and EVERYONE knows how THEY are *wink, wink*. He also got 53% of the college educated vote. But you don’t hear about that as much b/c this is totally all about how welfare queens/brown people/unions/poor people and their terrible voting habits are ruining our country, OBVI.

        2. Yes. Which is great, and was enough to win. I’m not saying it’s not a good idea to get people onto our side, but we don’t need them to win if we won without them.

    3. Single women voted for Obama 68%. Because they are wanton trollops seeking to over through the current power structure like Delilah with Sampson. So saith the O’Reallies of the world. Sad part about being legally wed is not being identified as a trollop bent on world domination.

        1. Do you also like me have a super sensitive touch screen to go with your Swype? Aargh!

          “O’Reallies” is a good one though.

  9. Yes, but is he the president of angry cinnamon buns?

    And what is his stance on angry cinnamon buns that recklessly kill shaved-ice babies?

  11. I really don’t think anything has changed really. I mean, back in 2004, I was convinced, CONVINCED! That Bush would be voted out of office cuz everyone, EVERYONE! hated the wars. Boy was I wrong.

    2. A few weeks ago I would have said that I could never think about another election again. But on election night I started to get really pumped up. I’ve already decided that I’ll join the phone banks for Clinton 2016! I would have done it for Obama, but I have little kids and I’m overworked with work and volunteer shit as it is. I’m clearing the ole schedule by 2016 so I can devote time to Hilary.

  13. Has anyone else see the map that REpublicans have apparently been posting that shows the country as red and blue based on COUNTY. One of my friends (that is rapidly moving up on the “to block” list) posted that ridiculous map and I just couldn’t help myself from commenting. Um…its a good thing that land mass doesn’t determine presidency…b/c the parts of the country that are blue are those that are actually well populated. I guess the 18 out of 20 people that live in Loving County, Texas should determine the presidency? It takes a lot of manipulation to find a way to make it look like Romney SHOULD have won. I mean, it wasn’t close. It wasn’t a Gore situation. Obama won the popular vote, too. And THEN, a commenter said that all “those people” who voted for Obama should have to move to California…and maybe he’d add Nevada. I had to reply to that, too. Hey, dude, we won, remember? Why should I have to leave the NY metro area (or any other, for that matter) when its filled with “those people” (that are just like me)? It kind of made me want to shout “WE WIN! WE WIN! WE WIIIIIIIN!!!” while jumping up and down. But of course I am MUCH more mature than that. ;P

    1. Pffffttt….we’re not. Mr. Kristen is big on gloating. So he walked out into our backyard and yelled “Weeee Wooooonnnn, you assholes.” Did I mention we live in Arizona…where every one of our neighbors had a Romney/Ryan yard sign? Then he insisted on watching Fox News because he wanted to “watch them die a little inside.” Then there was cake decorated with “Nate Silver is Awesome.” Hands down my favorite election ever.

      1. Yup, my husband has been “hate reading” and “hate listening” to conservative news since the election just b/c it makes him so happy to hear them be sad. He said one person who called in to a conservative radio show actually was in tears, “I just feel like I have no home. This isn’t MY country anymore.” He told me he almost had to pull the car over b/c he was laughing so hard.

    1. Meh, no more of a problem than they have with white people in general, it sounds like. And I’d like to see the age breakdown on that before I get too worried.

      1. And a breakdown on how many are wives submitting to their husbands like good little Christianists who do as they’re told.

        Now that I think of it, though, the one breakdown I haven’t seen in the exit polling (out of which my favourite statistic being the non-LGB vote being tied 49-49, though it did make me wonder why they decided to count T with S) is parents/non-parents, either alone or intersected with married/non-married.

  15. Which election did the author follow? Romney, a white Mormon who ran against a president lost by a rather thin margin. If one reads the article, one could think Obama won by a landslide.

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