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Actually a good article on the health of working moms vs. stay-at-home moms

As much as we link to Motherlode at the Times, I don’t say often enough how much I enjoy K.J. Dell’Antonia’s contributions. So I’ll do it here: K.J., you are great, and I appreciate how you try to write nuanced and fair pieces instead of just going for the sensational headline. This article about how working moms tend to be healthier than stay-at-home moms is no exception:

Dr. Frech and her co-author, Sarah Damaske, considered nearly 30 years of data provided by 2,540 mothers as participants in the National Longitudinal Study of Youth. They sorted the women into four mutually exclusive work pathways: “steadily working women, women who pulled back from full-time work following the first birth, women with repeated bouts of unemployment while attempting to work full-time — interrupted work careers — and stay-at-home mothers who did not work for pay and did not seek work.”

They found that the steadily working mothers were relatively advantaged before giving birth to their first children, and that the advantages, at least in the area of the women’s mental and physical health, did not just continue as they reached age 40, but increased (even when the researchers controlled for other variables). “It’s not just that they were advantaged before,” Dr. Frech said. “Even when you remove all the statistical noise, there are apparently added advantages from work.”

The authors don’t want their work seen as a judgment on an individual woman’s choice to work or stay home. For most women, Dr. Frech argued, the positive relationship between full-time work and health is less about “choices” than about “constrained choices.”

Other recent research has shown that a majority of women (62 percent in 2009) prefer part-time work and that part-time employment can have benefits for mothers and families when compared to other alternatives. That apparent dichotomy did not surprise Dr. Frech.

“It makes sense that women will look for part-time work when they become parents,” she said. “They’re choosing within the constraint of we as a society expecting women to be the primary caregiver, and considering added challenges. But we asked ‘what selects women onto these different paths?’ Women aren’t all equally able to find full-time work.”

Looked at as a segment of society, rather than as a segment of the upper middle class, “the kind of woman who works part-time is a different kind of woman,” Dr. Frech said. “She’s more likely not to have worked a full-time job at all before she gave birth. She’s more likely to have barriers of transportation or language.”

The conclusion of the piece is my favorite part:

But in order to consider what creates inequities of opportunity among all women, we need to keep research like Dr. Frech’s from getting lost as we defend our own choices. Amid balanced coverage of this research comes the inevitable provocations. “Let the Mommy Wars Begin Anew,” trumpets a headline on “Take Part.” ForbesWoman asks (at the end of a more balanced piece) “What kind of mom are you? Better yet, is there a point in defining it?”

“What kind of mom are you?” is a question that only a woman with access to education, transportation and child care gets to answer for herself. For most women, this research emphasizes, the question is what kind of mom you had the opportunity to be, and how those opportunities helped shape not just your parenting, but your health. But neither is the question we really need to be asking. What can we change to allow all women a better chance at real choices, and how?


23 thoughts on Actually a good article on the health of working moms vs. stay-at-home moms

  1. For most women, this research emphasizes, the question is what kind of mom you had the opportunity to be, and how those opportunities helped shape not just your parenting, but your health. But neither is the question we really need to be asking. What can we change to allow all women a better chance at real choices, and how?

    Yes. So. Much. Yes.

    Although I suspect that much of the answer to this is “deconstruct patriarchy and capitalism and well pretty much the whole kyriarchy.”

  2. And just to follow up – I really appreciate the emphasis on constrained choices. Because while it’s not helpful to completely erase individual agency from the picture, the context and limits within which this agency is practiced can’t be overlooked either, which is where “choose my choice” type statements really fall apart (whether it’s “I choose to work outside the home” or “I choose to work inside the home”, because women have been railroaded into either, depending on other factors). I think we need to celebrate agency, especially where that agency has been historically even more limited, but not lose sight of the battles that are on-going.

  3. I can’t believe she sees a difference between “steadily working mothers” and “stay-at-home mothers”…

    Inb4 shitst– oh, too late.

  4. I really appreciate the emphasis on constrained choices.

    I wouldn’t be surprised if being constrained to choose degraded choices is what predicts poorer health, really. If there is a drive to be seen as “valuable” to society, and thus a drive to work for pay, being in any way constrained away from that choice might hurt overall health.

  5. I can’t believe she sees a difference between “steadily working mothers” and “stay-at-home mothers”…

    Oh good, someone’s already found something to Take Issue With!

    I mean, we all know what the authors meant by that distinction (because it’s super fucking obvious), but no, no, let’s fake disbelief and outrage so we can win the Bestest Feminist Award for the thread.

  6. Fuck you, amblingalong, parenting is the hardest job in the world!

    Fuck you bagelsan, real feminists know it’s the most important job in the world. Your conflation of ‘hardness’ with ‘importance’ is an appeal to a phallocentric ideology in which sexual performance is linked to social worth. PROBLEMATIC.

  7. I used to be super butt-hurt about working moms being healthier/happier/better when i was at home with my kiddos, but it’s true. now that my kids are older and in school and im working, im in a better place. granted, it would be nice to be a homemaker/steader getting 8+ hours to myself to “work” at/in the home, but i would not trade how i am now, with how i was then.

  8. Fuck you, amblingalong, parenting is the hardest job in the world!

    Is this sarcasm or sincerity?

    Nuance in online comments is so difficult to accurately capture sometimes, so I will assume sarcasm, and return to my enjoyment of the study linked in the post.

  9. now that my kids are older and in school and im working, im in a better place.

    I think my mom would absolutely agree with you. I’ve seen her blossom, in a way, now that we kids are out of the house and she’s working. There was only so much babytalk and kid shit the woman with a Ph.D. in mechanical engineering could sit through endlessly without going stir-crazy.

  10. I wonder, though, how much the ability of women to work steadily is a class thing — because of the ability to afford decent, safe, reliable childcare. The idea way to raise babies (in my humble and mostly uninformed opinion) is one in which you, your co-parent/partner, and both of your extended families are able to chip in, but many of us don’t have that kind of extended network of support.

    So if you can’t rely on grandparents, aunts and uncles to help babysit you have to pay for childcare. If you’re paying for cheap childcare from a babysitter charging eight bucks an hour, you have to deal with the attendant unreliability and insecurity in your childcare setup. If you’re paying for a really good daycare or for a nanny… well, you’re paying a ton of money for someone else to watch your kid grow up instead of you, so unless you’re earning so much on top of daycare expenses that it’s financially worthwhile, why bother?

    Now there are a ton of feminist critiques of this attitude (foremost being, why is childcare always presumed to be coming out of the WOMAN’s salary in a hetero parenting situation?) but this is the attitude that a lot of women I know actually have toward child-rearing. My mother has said that she hated paying for someone else to watch us, and would far have preferred to be a stay-at-home mom than pay for a babysitter. I think if you’re working relatively low-wage, unrewarding jobs – jobs in retail or food service, secretarial work or agricultural labor – the rewards of the financial independence and broader social life that working provides pale against the desire to raise your children yourself.

  11. I wonder, though, how much the ability of women to work steadily is a class thing — because of the ability to afford decent, safe, reliable childcare.

    Well, that’s touched on in the last paragraph, which makes that explicit.

    You can only choose your choice within the set of choices you have available to you. For some women, childcare might not be as much of an issue as the availability of steady paying employment.

  12. I think if you’re working relatively low-wage, unrewarding jobs – jobs in retail or food service, secretarial work or agricultural labor – the rewards of the financial independence and broader social life that working provides pale against the desire to raise your children yourself.

    Careful with the raise your kids yourself language, that often gets commenters tripped here. WOHM parents raise their own kids too, even though they leave their children in the care of a 3rd party while they work.

    The reality of this cost benefit analysis for many people in these sorts of scenarios is that they often end up staying home to care for their kids, because the cost of the childcare alone exceeds their income. Even slightly more well-paid people end up weighing the factors and deciding that it isn’t worth it to pay so much for 3rd party childcare in return for little to no economic gain. I’ve said it before here that many people have jobs that they dislike, with either crappy benefits or no benefits at all, and that provide them with little to no personal fulfillment anyway, which will also factor into the decision to quit and stay home with their kid(s).

    As far as this study is concerned, I can see how it would be reassuring for those women who continue to WOH after they have kids. I already had middling to crappy health before I even had my children or quit to be a SAHM, and my high stress job was definitely contributing to undermining my personal and emotional health on a daily basis. Mostly, it was and remains a huge relief that I got out of there in one piece.

  13. Sociology is really great sometimes; sociology of the family especially. Four years after I left being a professional sociologist, sociology of the family, with its emphasis on choices and constraint, is something I still find myself referring to often over drinks with friends and the like.

  14. you’re paying a ton of money for someone else to watch your kid grow up instead of you

    the rewards of the financial independence and broader social life that working provides pale against the desire to raise your children yourself.

    Seriously, can we stop with the “women who work outside the home don’t raise their own children” crap? Honestly, when I see someone write that, it’s really hard for me to take anything else they say seriously. Many, many, many of the mothers I know, including my own, worked outside the home for all or part of their kids’ lives. They raised their kids, just as much as a SAHM. Yes, other adults helped care for those children (daycare workers, nannies, teachers, babysitters, relatives, etc.) but no one says a SAHM isn’t “raising her own children” because she sends them to school for eight hours a day. It drives me nuts, and it’s such unnecessarily inflammatory mommy-war mother shaming language.

  15. The way I read Alexandra’s post was along these lines: Some SAHMs may have chosen that parenting path because they did not have access to childcare and/or employment such that a job or career outside the home was preferable to being a SAHM.

    Perhaps I read that comment with a bias and if I did, it was because I am precisely such a woman. Being the spouse of an active duty service member means that we have only emotional support from extended family. Having had our first child the Summer after graduating from high school meant that I don’t yet have a degree thus seriously limiting my career options. Being a borderline over-protective parent and having heard just a handful of horror stories about different daycare facilities makes me terrified of them. Low wages plus high costs of child care makes the benefits of working outside the home pale in comparrison to the benefits of being a SAHM for me.

    Now, this doesn’t mean that I don’t want to work outside my home; quite the opposite, in fact. It also doesn’t mean that I consider my choice to be any better or worse than anyone else’s. I personally consider women who are able to find the resources they need to be both a parent and an employed person and who have the ability to manage it all to be heroic in their own right. This is because I would prefer to be in that situation but it’s not in the cards for me yet. I tend to feel similarly about the SAHPs who can manage the entire household from cleaning, to cooking, to finances, to childcare, etc. and make it look like a breeze because it’s a huge struggle for me. ADHD plus limited options and support equals me perpetually disorganized and trying to play catch up.

    I do consider parenting to be the toughest job anyone can have in that, no matter what situation we are in, we are completely responsible for not only the basic care of a child, but for raising our child(ren) to be healthy (mentally and physically), educated, good people as adults. It’s one thing to make sure that our kids are fed and sheltered and clothed, but teaching our children to be good people is a whole different area. How do we know what things we do or say will lead to positive things and vice versa? What if they don’t grow up to be good people? Will it be [my] fault or will it have been their choice? Will the things that I consider to be good traits be beneficial if I teach my child that way or will they cause more struggle than my child can deal with as an adult? What will I do if/when something happens that I can’t prevent or protect them from?

    Maybe I’m way off base here, but I’ve always thought that these are among the internal struggles that most parents have and among the things that make parenting tough no matter what one’s parenting, employment, or financial status may be. In my humble mind, this is where the proverbial playing ground is leveled for all parents of all stripes.

  16. Seriously, can we stop with the “women who work outside the home don’t raise their own children” crap?

    I agree that the insidious suggestion that working parents (especially mothers) aren’t real parents is gross and really disturbing, and full of shit. My mother worked for most of my toddlerhood and pre-adolescence.

    But there is something to be said for the fact that you’re giving over your child’s waking hours to someone else to shape. There’s something to be said for the fact that kids in day-care, on average, speak sooner and have better social skills; there’s also something to be said about the times a kid comes home saying the word “fuck” or crying because the other children won’t play with them because their black, or their mommies or gay, or don’t believe in Jesus.

  17. As a former childcare worker, I wonder what the effects of caregiving for children on health per se are. I have to say, the idea that as a woman I should assume that in order for me to have the privaledge of working a job that pays a lot, I should have the right to hire a woman who gets paid less than me to care for my children is problematic to me.

    For 8 dollars an hour I could pay someone else to watch my kid while I go to work somewhere else that pays 8 dollars an hour. What if I have a tendency to work childcare anyway and I would prefer to hang out with my kid than scrub toilets? I am sincerely curious about so many other variables that did not get teased out here. What types of work are we talking about and what are the health effects of those types of work on women’s health? Is forty years of being a near minimum wage earning food service worker better than staying at home for woman’s health? Is forty years working as a wageearning day care assistant better for women’s health? I think the assumption is these are going to be women who earn a high income— higher than child care workers.

    And I do genuinely wonder how much of the health benefits are tied to the fact that value and praise and status tends to come from work and child care giving (especially infant/toddler) is considered low wage and low status work. I think it’s also fairly high stress work and hard on caregivers health in different ways than many other types of work. I have to say as a caregiver and minimum wageish earner, and mom who would way more like to be with my kids than washing dishes at a pizza place– I feel like this research is mostly about affirming that being middle to upper class and having status and the abilities to ensure that status and wealth continues (high trust in stability of econimic situation) is good for health. Which duh. There just seems like a lot more to unpack here at least the way my brain works.

  18. Also my parents both worked full time and there was no one available to have a relationship. I think part time options– that pay well and have the high status attached– would be better suited to family life such that kids don’t have to be at school 50 hours their whole lives including summer– or hanging out at home alone. Drinking is what I was doing those summers by myself.

  19. Its nice to have choices. We forget that in other countries people are grateful when either parent has a job.

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