Of Spanking and State Violence July 6, 2011 Jill Latoya Peterson writes about spanking, households where violence is atmospheric, and how assumptions of peace influence our conversations about punishment. Go read it, because it’s an incredible piece.
Where LaToya says that kids were advised not to wear brand new clothes because they’d get beaten or killed for it – it made me think of the SlutWalks and how a woman doesn’t deserve to be raped for wearing a short skirt or heels – it seems that this was like the same thing, that no one deserves to be beaten or killed or raped for what they wear. Yet the “not wearing new clothes” was presented as “valuable, pretty effective” advice to avoid violence; it made me think: would feminists encourage women to dress modestly if a it were proven to be a “valuable, pretty effective” way to avoid rape? Becuase I’m thinking not, and I wouldn’t even want to encourage that, but I read LaToya’s piece and that really stuck out to me.
Well, bhuesca, I think it’s a different set of concerns. Kids actually do get beaten or killed for wearing brand-new clothes in certain areas. That is true. It’s not so true that women are raped because they’re wearing short skirts. The question of what a rape victim is wearing is used to blame her and take responsibility off of the rapist; encouraging women to wear less “revealing” clothes doesn’t actually do anything to protect women or prevent rape. But parents not letting their kids wear brand-new clothes may actually protect them from harm. Also, if a kid gets beat up for wearing new clothes, no reasonable person says he was asking for it.
Thanks, Jilll – I guess I am just worried that the focus on kids not wearing new clothes because they could be beaten or killed kind of takes the focus off of the beaters and killers and puts it on the clothes (picturing a t-shirt holding a 22-caliber to its wearer), just as focusing on what rape victims wear takes the focus off of the rapist (and how rape can only be stopped when rapists don’t rape.)
bhuesca: Where LaToya says that kids were advised not to wear brand new clothes because they’d get beaten or killed for it – it made me think of the SlutWalks and how a woman doesn’t deserve to be raped for wearing a short skirt or heels – it seems that this was like the same thing, that no one deserves to be beaten or killed or raped for what they wear. Yet the “not wearing new clothes” was presented as “valuable, pretty effective” advice to avoid violence; it made me think: would feminists encourage women to dress modestly if a it were proven to be a “valuable, pretty effective” way to avoid rape? Becuase I’m thinking not, and I wouldn’t even want to encourage that, but I read LaToya’s piece and that really stuck out to me. Children have been murdered in DC for their brand new shoes, jackets, or coats. Like seriously, the killer admits to killing for THAT reason. It sucks, but it is true. In some places, wearing certian colors can make you a target, you weren’t asking for it, you didn’t deserve it but it is probably why some are singled out.
Azalea, she’s writing about a DC of the past. D.C.’s murder rate is now the lowest it has been in 45 years. Because of gentrification, much of the crime has shifted to the poorer suburbs east of the city. It’s still a problem, but you can’t conflate the D.C. she’s describing then with the current D.C. If you’d been there then and recently, you’d see a pretty big difference.
samanthab: Azalea, she’s writing about a DC of the past. D.C.’s murder rate is now the lowest it has been in 45 years. Because of gentrification, much of the crime has shifted to the poorer suburbs east of the city. It’s still a problem, but you can’t conflate the D.C. she’s describing then with the current D.C. If you’d been there then and recently, you’d see a pretty big difference. I live in DC I have never lived further than Montgomery County, MD away from D.C. South of the River is STILL full of crimes liek that. WMATA still reports crimes where children are beaten and stabbed/shot for their new clothes on public trnasit. I am speaking from front row and center.
Azalea, we are (not really) almost neighbors!! I lived in Baltimore County (Towson) for years. I’m still in Maryland, just further north. D.C was the place to go once we got tired of the same 4 neighborhoods in Baltimore that we went out to 🙂 What part of DC are you in? I know alot of crime was pushed out into PG County because i have alot of friends who live there. If the crime rate in Baltimore ever drops (someone was killed in a stabbing and a child was shot on the 4th of July in the Harbor, so I’m not hopeful) it will be because they’ve simply pushed the crime into the outlying suburbs.
I love, love, love the piece she wrote because it clearly explained why this issue isn’t as black and white (pun not intended) as some people want it to be. It’s insulting to have people accuse your parenting methods of being disgusting, barbaric, and awful without giving any thought whatsoever as to context. For the record, I’m not a parent. I did, however, live in neighborhoods similar to the one discussed by Latoya. If you’ve never been there and never seen this firsthand, you just don’t get it.
Miss S: Azalea, we are (not really) almost neighbors!! I lived in Baltimore County (Towson) for years. I’m still in Maryland, just further north. D.C was the place to go once we got tired of the same 4 neighborhoods in Baltimore that we went out to 🙂 What part of DC are you in? I know alot of crime was pushed out into PG County because i have alot of friends who live there. If the crime rate in Baltimore ever drops (someone was killed in a stabbing and a child was shot on the 4th of July in the Harbor, so I’m not hopeful) it will be because they’ve simply pushed the crime into the outlying suburbs. Hey neighbor! 🙂 I bounce between SE and NW, I’m not a big baseball fan but when the stadium was built SE was revitalized and I didn’t want to miss out on the chance to get in on “prime real estate” (never thought anyone would be saying that about SE huh?). It’s my comfort zone. I went from Silver Spring and Chevy Chase and bounced back and forth between Georgetown and Anacostia. My best friend lives in Baltimore, closer to Arundel County though and she says the crime is moving away from her. 4th of July was pretty decent here I hadn’t heard or seen anything crazy and I was near Anacostia Park in SE. PG County has serious police issues!