In defense of the sanctimonious women's studies set || First feminist blog on the internet

Things to Read

An Open Letter to Good Morning America Concerning the Chris Brown Situation. Maybe the best thing you’ll read today. Key line: “But so here is why I am writing this letter to you, Good Morning America: WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM? Not only are you not pressing charges against Chris Brown, but now you are asking him to return to the show? What kind of pandering, pro-violence, egomania-enabling, fucked up world without consequences (for a chosen few) do you live in, you assholes?”

Sex and the long-term relationship: People who have been together for a long time don’t do it enough. And everyone (not just men, duh) wants to bone more, suggesting “it’s not just an issue of differing sex drives, but of other tasks and obligations competing for a couple’s time.”

A heartbreaking story from a man whose wife terminated her pregnancy, and the medical hoops they had to jump through.

The New York Times is now requiring digital subscriptions (you still get access to 20 free articles per month; beyond that, you pay, but clicking on a New York Times article that was linked through a blog or social media will still be free, even if you’ve exceeded your 20-article limit). People are mad. This is basically how I feel about it.

How to do drugs and not die. Uh, hmm.

Corporal punishment in schools is still allowed in 20 states(!). Although the issue does lend itself to hilariously-named organizations, such as People Opposed to Paddling Students (because yes, there are actually people who are for paddling students!).

Remember the 11-year-old girl who was raped by more than a dozen men in Texas, and whose style of dress and “mature” behavior were reported in a shockingly victim-blamey article in the Times? (Trigger warning). Yeah, turns out that she was being raped over a three-month period by numerous members of her community, and dozens of adults helped in the cover-up. Nineteen men are being charged. Community members saw the 11-year-old spending time with adult men, some of whom were convicted sex offenders and some of whom were convicted of an astonishingly wide variety of other charges (ranging from robbery to murder), and the conclusion was, “She’s a slut.” Let’s re-emphasize that: Adults across an entire community colluded in the repeated gang rape of a sixth-grader.

Why the Wal-Mart sex bias case is the most important one the Supreme Court will hear this year.

Doree Shafrir writes a touching piece about her dog, and it will make you cry.

Early puberty and environmental injustice: The biological impacts of environment change.


40 thoughts on Things to Read

  1. The NYTimes makes better on it’s previous gaffe, but it’s still missing some layers that absolve questions about the girl and her family. The Houston Chronicle fills in many of the blanks (but not without some proper slut-shaming innuendo), and according to this article it sounds like the girl and the family are being harassed for following through with the case. Up to 28 men will be charged with sexually assaulting this girl, possibly including a star high school athlete and the son of a local school board member. Serious trigger warnings all around on the article I linked and anything else related to this case.

  2. Re: NYT paywall

    As satirical a note as that Onion piece sounds, I’m thinking that most people will not pay for NYT reporting when they get news for free in places like Washington Post, BBC, etc. For some, the NYT is worth the premium over these other news outlets, but for the vast majority I’m skeptical, and then there’s the risk of not being able to maintain ad revenue if traffic falls off significantly enough. It’s a no-win situation for the money-strapped Times, especially since advertisers aren’t as willing to pay for similar size/space in online content as in print, but that’s capitalism.

  3. The whole story’s horrible, but after reading through the whole horrible story, I’m struck by the mother’s description of a ‘mass in her brain’; a f-cking brain tumor?? I betcha she has no health insurance, so will get a bit of surgery (maybe) and then ‘see you later’. So this woman is dealing with a horrifically abused daughter, a diabetic husband, a (desparate) house move due to angry (probably racist) neighbors, AND a brain tumor. And no doubt her legislators will call her a welfare queen or worse … in a ‘first-world’ ‘developed’ country. A country with no mercy, whatsoever.

  4. Every time I think Texas can’t get more awful it sinks lower. Should just relocate the family and burn the town down. And sow the remains with salt so no one will ever live there again. This also adds to my theory that men’s athletic teams should be under house arrest during the off-season. Jocks always get rapey.

  5. That’s just what I was going to say, Politicalguineapig. Could things possibly get any worse?

  6. Regarding the NYT paywall, I get my news from the UK Guardian and Al Jazeera, which are vastly better than the NYT. Also, Jill, as you’re basically agreeing with The Onion, I think that attitude is rather dismissive of poor people. As more and more news sources become pay-gated AND net neutrality goes down the toilet, more and more people will be frozen out of news sources in particular and the internet in general. It’s pretty hard to sustain social justice organizing on the ‘nets when your small, poorly funded org can’t pay the rates to get the kind of access that NYT can.

    Just as big 501c3 orgs aren’t “just charities”, NYT isn’t “just a business.”

  7. Not all of Texas is bad. [/derail]

    The story of that poor little girl’s rape just gets more and more heartbreaking. I don’t know how else to phrase it. Perhaps I’ll be more eloquent later. But right now… I’m too sick to my stomach to formulate anything more than “oh my god”.

  8. GallingGalla: Also, Jill, as you’re basically agreeing with The Onion, I think that attitude is rather dismissive of poor people.

    Poor like how the writers will end up if there’s no one to pay their salaries?

    I get what you’re saying, but I think the NYT deal is pretty fair for readers, especially considering the multitude of other free news sources out there.

    1. GG, yeah, there’s a fundamental tension there. Obviously ideally, everyone would have equal access to every available news source. At the same time, though, it takes human work and effort to report that news. And I’m increasingly worried by the shift towards opinion-centered news rather than direct reporting, because opinion-centered news is cheaper than actually going out and doing the legwork of telling stories and investigating problems. I think the Times has struck a ok balance — they charge a relatively low amount for unlimited access, and offer limited access for free. It’s not great, but I’m not sure how else you make sure that the actual hard work of journalism is compensated.

  9. People who have been together for a long time don’t do it enough. And everyone (not just men, duh) wants to bone more

    pithy, but no. not everyone. the article specifically says the study was focused on heterosexual couples. not everyone is hetero! shocking, i know, but there it is.

    also, if you read the article, it says that 1/3 of the women reported having more sex than they wanted. so that’s, uh, a little problematic don’t you think?

  10. So when is the NYT going to accurately follow through with this business model and start paying people to read Ross Douthat?

  11. A question I wonder about is how much the “complaints about frequency of sex” is actually a projection of other problems in the relationship, expressed through sexual displeasure. I think that with men in particular, a general problem with how the relationship is going might rather be expressed as a problem with sex, as men aren’t “supposed” to have emotional issues.

  12. Politicalguineapig: This also adds to my theory that men’s athletic teams should be under house arrest during the off-season. Jocks always get rapey.

    Really?

    Bushfire: That’s just what I was going to say, Politicalguineapig.

    Really?

    Politicalguineapig: Jocks always get rapey.

    Really! There are so so so many things wrong with this that I’m not sure where to even start. I think I’ll just point out that it is empirically false and that, as a general rule, it is wrong to judge an entire group of people (any group of people) by the actions of some members of the group and leave it at that.

  13. And everyone (not just men, duh) wants to bone more

    “bone”? Bone. As in, “boner.” As in, use your penis to fuck. Hmmm.

    I can safely say that many people on this earth who enjoy sexual activity do not want to “bone” more.

    Patriarchy. You’re soaking in it.

  14. Also, I believe I read on a certain feminist site (ahem) that there are people who are/identify as/tend toward being asexual; I’m guessing therefore that not everyone wants more sex.

    And echoing the “women having more sex than they may want”- I’ve read here that “unwanted sex” is a euphemism for rape. And marital rape, if unwanted sex does in fact equal rape, is still rape, and is still illegal. But this wasn’t addressed here or by the NYT…

  15. 1. I meant “everyone” to refer to the majority of study participants. It was, in fact, a pithy characterization.

    2. The term “bone” doesn’t have to mean PIV sex. It is just a funny term for sex. Let’s all take a breath.

    3. Having sex more often than is your ideal does not mean you are being regularly raped.

  16. This also adds to my theory that men’s athletic teams should be under house arrest during the off-season. Jocks always get rapey.

    This also adds to my theory that all posts by politicalgunieapig are an elaborate act of satire aimed at discrediting feminists.

  17. Re: the NYT…

    Actually, I am surprised that they haven’t done anything like this sooner. I can’t imagine how they have been managing to pay all of their journalists, photographers, columnists, editors, IT staff, etc, etc, etc…

    I value their content (hell, I read more then the “20 free” articles from them PER DAY) and signed up for a subscription because I want them to keep producing that quality content. Kind of like I also support NPR because I like to listen to their programming and want my local station to keep being able to afford that quality programming.

    At the end of the day, like it or not, the NY Times IS “just a business”…

  18. If you read the text of the NYT article on long-term relationships, it absolutely does NOT say that “everyone wants to bone more.” It only says that about 42% of women, and 54% of men are unhappy with the frequency of sex. Of those 42%, two thirds wanted more sex, and one third wanted less. So, in reality, only about 28% of women in the sample wanted more sex, whereas the “overwhelming majority” of men wanted more sex.

    Another interesting takeaway point is that almost half of men (46%) and more than half (58%) of women reported being satisfied with the amount of sex in their current relationships. Another reading of the article might be, “Sex in American Marriages: Pretty much OK!”

    Please read articles before formulating headlines.

  19. My LTR definitely suffers from too little sex, and it definitely IS because of obligations. A POX ON ALL THE OBLIGATIONS’ HOUSES. (not really, okay?) And I am a lady. So, sorry to break out of the commenting mainstream, I guess.

    Also, the Slate article on the Wal-Mart case was very interesting.

    But man, the NYT piece on the case in TX and the On the Issues thing about environmental hazards… =(

  20. Tomfoolery and Aaron: Thing is, men who spend a lot of time with other men (on male-only blogs, in sports teams, and fraternities) tend to lose empathy, especially toward women. This is the second gang-rape I’ve heard of (not counting the Duke thing) that involved high school athletes, and there’ve been several sexual assaults at the local university that involved student athletes and fraternities.
    I’d be willing to bet that some of the adult sex offenders and the adults who covered for them were either involved in high school athletics, or in the army at one point- or both.
    So my theory is that the amount of time a man spends in the proximity of other men increases his chances of becoming a rapist. So therefore, in order to decrease instances of rape, cracking down on the sports teams/fraternities might be a good way to start.
    Another thing: as far as Cleveland, Texas goes, my givadamn is broken. I wish the so-called adults every misfortune. What a disgusting shit-stain of a town.
    Oh, and Tomfoolery- get my name right if you’re going to rag on me. It’s ‘guineapig’ not guinieapig. And I think Bushfire was agreeing with me on Texas, not on the jock thing. Zie’s right- it’s a hell hole of a state.
    (Apologies to Bushfire: I’m guessing you’re female, but I don’t know how you like to be identified.)

  21. related to nothing above: i canNOT get feministe – not a link to a specific article, not the main website – to open in IE.

    i finally broke down and downloaded FireFox [and FF and my OS aren’t really compatable] but… anyone have any clue WHY?

    moving on:Texas and trigger warning applies

    why are people surprised at people helping rapists cover up their raping? the only thing that surprised me was how open these people were about their covering up.
    when my stepfather started raping me when i was 12, the entire freaking neighborhood knew. they knew that he beat me, before that. one of the teenagers used to spy on me, with binocs – after the rape started, one night he snuck over and *videotaped* it. my entire school – students, teachers, admin – knew.
    the only people who didn’t know were my mother [mostly because she didn’t WANT to know] and my father, who has the excuse of being on the other side of the country, in the AF. [course, he DID know that my stepfather beat me, so…]

    when CPS FINALLY got involved, 4 years later, every single neighbor said they were “shocked”, “surprised”. their kids said things like “well, mom said she did it to herself, just look at her – she looks like a “hooker”” or “dad would wonder if maybe she’d be interested in a “man” who didn’t beat her first”.

    if my stepfather hadn’t died, at least 2 of my neighbors would have been up on charges of “accessory after the fact”.

    it’s a function of fear – they KNEW i was 12; my bra size had nothing to do with it, they were AFRAID. rape is one of those things that people [especially women] can’t *control*, it could happen to THEM at any time, so to make themselves feel better, safer, whatever, they blamed ME so that they wouldn’t have to worry about my stepfather raping THEM. or worse, raping their kids.

    in a way, it’s “if these boys are busy raping THIS one girl, who probably did something to MAKE them do it, then they aren’t raping MY daughter/sister/mother/friend/niece/whomever.

    it’s wrong, it’s sick – and it’s not going away. blaming the victim has absolutely NOTHING to do with the victim, and everything to do with the blamer.

  22. Thing is, men who spend a lot of time with other men (on male-only blogs, in sports teams, and fraternities) tend to lose empathy, especially toward women. This is the second gang-rape I’ve heard of (not counting the Duke thing) that involved high school athletes, and there’ve been several sexual assaults at the local university that involved student athletes and fraternities.

    I was writing a response to this nonsense, but honestly, why? I don’t believe that any honest progressive has as cavalier a disregard for the civil rights of people who have committed no crimes are you purport to. Earlier in this thread, you advocated the preemptive detention of men — many of whom are of marginalized minorities (Cleveland, TX is, for example, disproportionately African American) — to prevent them from possibly committing a crime. This is ludicrous. You are what MRAs imagine feminists are like. You are the Christwire.org of progressivism.

  23. Tomfoolery: I don’t care. If men are incapable of controlling themselves, their movements should be limited. Men do not want to stop rape, actively cover up rape, and sometimes get their female friends and relatives to cover for them. And then you get this sort of sickness. White or black, my response would still be the same: men need to be monitored, especially when they run in packs.

  24. Tomfoolery: I don’t care. If men are incapable of controlling themselves, their movements should be limited. Men do not want to stop rape, actively cover up rape, and sometimes get their female friends and relatives to cover for them. And then you get this sort of sickness. White or black, my response would still be the same: men need to be monitored, especially when they run in packs.

    As I said: I do not believe you actually believe this. This is an inappropriate venue for satire.

  25. Politicalguineapig: Thing is, men who spend a lot of time with other men (on male-only blogs, in sports teams, and fraternities) tend to lose empathy, especially toward women.

    This claim strikes me as…odd. Speaking from my own experience, I can say that my time with a male-only sports team in high school did not cause me to lose empathy towards women (or at all). Nor did my time in gamming groups which were only composed of men hurt my empathy. So what you are saying certainly does not resonate with my lived experience.
    But I’m only one person and I know I was and am not an “average” man, so it is possible that my experiences in this regard differ from the norm. So, I looked for studies or data to support this claim and I could find none. This is such a broad and sweeping claim that there should be some data to support it. Finding none (though if you are aware of any such study I’d be interested in seeing it) I am disinclined to believe this claim.

    Politicalguineapig: This is the second gang-rape I’ve heard of (not counting the Duke thing) that involved high school athletes, and there’ve been several sexual assaults at the local university that involved student athletes and fraternities.

    I do not doubt this is true. But the fact that some members of group X engage in act Y does not mean that being a part of group X causes one to engage in act Y (or even that it makes engaging in act Y more likely).

    Politicalguineapig: I’d be willing to bet that some of the adult sex offenders and the adults who covered for them were either involved in high school athletics, or in the army at one point- or both.

    Given that a large percent of people in the USA (c. 10%, if my quick googleing is accurate) are veterans and that a large % of people in the USA were involved in high school athletics, I’d bet so too. But, if that turns out to be the case, it is unsurprising and would not suggest the causal link you are suggesting.

    Politicalguineapig: So my theory is that the amount of time a man spends in the proximity of other men increases his chances of becoming a rapist. So therefore, in order to decrease instances of rape, cracking down on the sports teams/fraternities might be a good way to start.

    An interesting theory. But, so far, you’ve provided no evidence to support it (and I think you are unlikely to be able to do so). And, even if you were to be able to provide some support for this theory, I don’t see how it would justify preemptive detention. As a general matter, I think it is unjust to punish a person for a crime they may commit at some unknown point in the future.

    Tom Foolery: I don’t believe that any honest progressive has as cavalier a disregard for the civil rights of people who have committed no crimes are you purport to.

    10 years ago I’d have agreed with you, but in the last 10 years I’ve seen a number of feminists and progressives (or at least people who appeared to genuinely believe that they were feminists and/or progressives, and who self-identified as such) advocate for preemptive detention of people who have committed no crimes. Politicalguineapig may be advocating a rather extreme form of the position, but not a position that is so far removed from the dialogue that I find it implausible.

  26. Politicalguineapig:
    Tomfoolery: I don’t care. If men are incapable of controlling themselves, their movements should be limited. Men do not want to stop rape, actively cover up rape, and sometimes get their female friends and relatives to cover for them. And then you get this sort of sickness. White or black, my response would still be the same: men need to be monitored, especially when they run in packs.

    If your “if” was actually true of all men, I would agree with you. But that is not the case.

    One of the feminist tenets I am particularly attached to is the faith that men are not, in fact, unable to control themselves – that it is our culture, not their biology, that encourages rape, and that while the culture favors men, it is all of ours – women can be complicit in rape culture too. Not all men are rapists, as much as popular culture would like to have us believe that they are.

    You have a valid critique of what jock culture can often be like – it can involve a lot of machismo and misogyny, and tolerance of rape. Yes, masculinity is far too often seen as requiring misogyny. But that is a cultural thing. There can be and are men, and groups of men even, who do not rape. Male athletes and soldiers and frat members who also do not rape.

    It is counterproductive, and it plays into rape culture, to say that men are rapists and that is that. No, men are not biologically required to rape, and it makes so much more sense to expect better of them.

  27. Jill:
    1. I meant “everyone” to refer to the majority of study participants. It was, in fact, a pithy characterization.

    I understand that pithiness is a good thing, and that your intent was only to be pithy and not to be exclusive or inaccurate, but I’m still kinda :/ about the implication that everyone wants to have sex, duh!, since it wasn’t really clear that you were restricting that everyone to the *majority* of the people in the study. I appreciate the clarification, but I don’t think that readers could be expected to necessarily know what you mean, and I feel that that was a totally reasonable objection to make. It’s not that we think you don’t care about inclusiveness, it’s just that inclusiveness doesn’t just happen because we intend it – we have to consciously include it. Which of course you must know already.

  28. 10 years ago I’d have agreed with you, but in the last 10 years I’ve seen a number of feminists and progressives (or at least people who appeared to genuinely believe that they were feminists and/or progressives, and who self-identified as such) advocate for preemptive detention of people who have committed no crimes.

    Inspired satire can walk the line between plausible and implausible so perfectly as to make themselves indistinguishable from real adherents to a set of beliefs. Truly, we are dealing with a master.

  29. Tom Foolery: Inspired satire can walk the line between plausible and implausible so perfectly as to make themselves indistinguishable from real adherents to a set of beliefs. Truly, we are dealing with a master.

    The way I see it, if it’s that close to plausible, it is worth engaging with as if it is a genuine position. I think it is possible that, even if you are right and Politicalguineapig does not personally believe the views expressed, at least one person reading this discussion holds views close to the ones expressed by Politicalguineapig. So I think that the ideas are worth engaging, whether or not they are being expressed in earnest by any particular poster.
    Plus, having been called falsely accused of trolling on other sites in the past, I’m reluctant to accuse anyone of arguing in bad faith unless I have a very strong reason to believe they are.

  30. With the NYT pay wall going up, how about a heads up when linking to them so we can actually chose which 20 articles we read? This article just wasted 2 of my 20 for the month. A quick citation would do it.

    1. With the NYT pay wall going up, how about a heads up when linking to them so we can actually chose which 20 articles we read? This article just wasted 2 of my 20 for the month. A quick citation would do it.

      If you read the NYT letter to readers about linking, you’ll see that links clicked through blogs are free, so that’s not really an issue.

  31. And plus, when you hover your cursor over the link, the URL appears at the bottom of your browser, so that clues you in that it’s an NYT article, too. (I’m assuming no visual impairment on the part of the reader, fwiw.)

  32. The way I see it, if it’s that close to plausible, it is worth engaging with as if it is a genuine position. I think it is possible that, even if you are right and Politicalguineapig does not personally believe the views expressed, at least one person reading this discussion holds views close to the ones expressed by Politicalguineapig. So I think that the ideas are worth engaging, whether or not they are being expressed in earnest by any particular poster.

    I see where you’re coming from, but I disagree. The views PGP is espousing belong in the same realm as claims like “Elvis is still alive,” “L. Ron Hubbard has a lot to say about the human condition,” and “The failure of National Socialism was due to implementation, not its principles.” They simply have nothing to add to reasonable discourse.

    People who agree with PGP that a large subset of men who have committed no crimes should be locked up should see not that people are willing to engage, but that these ideas aren’t even allowed in the door of a reasonable house of discourse.

  33. Tom Foolery: I see where you’re coming from, but I disagree. The views PGP is espousing belong in the same realm as claims like “Elvis is still alive,” “L. Ron Hubbard has a lot to say about the human condition,” and “The failure of National Socialism was due to implementation, not its principles.” They simply have nothing to add to reasonable discourse.

    I see where you are coming from, and I agree (to a point). I agree that the views expressed by Politicalguineapig have nothing to add to reasonable discourse. And I wish they fell into the same category as the other ideas you suggest, but I see a major difference between what Politicalguineapig is suggesting and those views. Namely, while Politicalguineapig is expressing an extreme form of them, those views (or similar but slightly less extreme views) actually drive policy in the USA (and other countries, but I am more familiar with the USA and can speak more intelligently about the American legal system than others).

    Tom Foolery: People who agree with PGP that a large subset of men who have committed no crimes should be locked up should see not that people are willing to engage, but that these ideas aren’t even allowed in the door of a reasonable house of discourse.

    The sad fact of the matter is that, in the USA, preemptive detention is going on right now. It is being used for a small subset of people rather than a large one and it is (I think/believe but am not sure) being based on criteria more narrow than the ones Politicalguineapig suggests – but it is happening. And I have seen otherwise reasonable people (including progressives and feminists) cheer this fact.

    So, while these ideas shouldn’t be part of reasonable discourse (and I whole heartedly agree they shouldn’t), they are a part of the actual discourse and I see value in engaging them. The truth of the matter is I don’t believe a reasonable defense for these ideas can be offered, so by engaging with them I think we can show that they are not reasonable (and hopefully change a few minds along the way).

  34. Emeryn:
    Not all of Texas is bad. [/derail]

    The story of that poor little girl’s rape just gets more and more heartbreaking. I don’t know how else to phrase it. Perhaps I’ll be more eloquent later. But right now… I’m too sick to my stomach to formulate anything more than “oh my god”.

    The worst part is that those of us who work in poverty and mental health fields know that this sort of thing isn’t even *remotely* uncommon. When I’m providing services for someone who has gone through something horrific like this, I put on my armor and power through, but sometimes, like tonight, this shit just kicks me in the gut.

    I have worked with the *offenders* as well, and as ugly as what they do is, I will never deny them their humanity, because to a man the ones I’ve met have been just as horrifically abused. Not that they shouldn’t be locked up for life if found guilty (they absolutely should), but the whole fucking waste of humanity thing just breaks my heart.

    And here our GOP overlords want to make it harder for women to protect themselves sexually from men (because that’s what all the attacks on reproductive rights are really all about) and sometimes I get so angry I want to start an invasion or something. Or a movement. But I’m a fucking ‘professional’, so I have to keep moving the system at its glacially slow rate, and do what I can to stop the bleeding.

    I don’t know why this hit me so hard tonight, but thanks for listening.

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