In defense of the sanctimonious women's studies set || First feminist blog on the internet

Just a Question

What makes you happy?


75 thoughts on Just a Question

  1. In no particular order: spending time with my husband, working on something new and creative, reading, jogging (but not getting ready to jog), learning new things, playing with cats, and writing my blog.

  2. -Food! I love eating. Last night I had three artichokes for dinner, and tonight I’ll be home-frying chicken! I love cooking, it’s such a relaxant.
    -BATTLESTAR GALACTICA. Television in general, but specifically BSG right now.
    -Knitting.
    -Writing. And positive feedback (in terms of hits/comments/links) to what I’ve written.
    -Tights and cardigans weather!

  3. My girlfriend just gave me a soft toy from “Building Bears”. It’s a dog; Obi Woof Kenobi. it’s got a lightsaber in its mouth. Just looking at it, and the silliness of the gift and the depth of feeling expressed in it, makes me happy in a way I’m really not used to. I feel soft and fluffy and cared for.

    What else makes me happy? Besides, I mean, looking forward to seeiing her tomorrow?

    Writing. Putting the right words in the right order and communicating my meaning.

    Successful activism. When the good guys win.

    My cat, leaping up to lie beside me and headbutt me and purr fiercely at me.

    Being outside on a cold clear night and looking up at the stars.

    Being with friends.

    My girlfriend. Unexpectedly, newly, not-sure-where-this-going: but yes, very very happy.

  4. In order of happy causing vibes –

    1) Spending time with my significant other
    2) Hanging out with my dog
    3) Thinking and writing on academic subjects
    4) Playing video games
    5) The SUN…I love the sun…Fall is already bumming me out
    6) Baking

    Fortunately, many of these happen together exponentially increasing the happiness factor. Combine 1, 2 and 5. Combine 1 and 6, although Abbie usually comes into the kitchen to taste the results. Combine 1, 2, and 4. Combine 1, 2 and 3.

    Now if only there were someway to have an academic, baking video game outside in the sun that I could play with my SO while my dog sits on my lap.

  5. Books.

    My dogs.

    Being in the swimming pool at night without clothes.

    Driving far into the night with music or audiobooks. Road trips.

    News stories about scientific discoveries.

    Knitting. Hand painted yarns.

    Rain.

    What Samuel Pepys called “good discourse”.

    Little wet puppy tongues licking my face or my fingers.

  6. Riding horses. I come away from my lessons grinning like happy fule.

    My kids. My partner. Sitting down at the dinner table with same. Cooking. Eating. Food.

    Reading. Snuggling with my cat.

    Running, riding my bike to work, taiji.

    Spending time with friends.

    Redwood forests. Otters, coyotes, redtail hawks, scrub jays.

  7. (In No Particular Order)

    *Going for long walks with my iPod
    *Watching my favorite TV shows (of which there are MANY!)
    *Reading academic gender theory
    *Checking Twitter and Facebook
    *Eating unhealthy, yummy foods
    *Petting kitties
    *Dancing in the dark to a great beat
    *Red Wine
    *Good sex
    *Sleeping in
    *Long Car Rides
    *Singing
    *Daydreaming

  8. Singing.
    Playing my guitar.
    Sunshine and being outside.
    Doing crafty things with my hands/making stuff (i.e., knitting, art projects, building things, baking).
    Spending quality time with people that I love: my dearest friends, my girlfriend, my family…
    Eating delicious food.
    Drinking a great cup of coffee, and having the time to enjoy it.
    Puttering around my house.
    Good sex.
    The beginning of a road trip — that feeling of finally getting out the door, and heading towards adventure, with good tunes and good company.
    Planning trips/travel/assorted adventures.
    Making music with other people.
    Playing with dogs.
    Flirting with babies.
    Noticing nature in my backyard, or in the middle of the city.

    Please note: this list is incomplete, and is in no particular order. 🙂

  9. 1. the autumn leaves crunching under my boots
    2. dancing in the dark
    3. eating healthy
    4. my dog
    5. finishing a drawing or a print
    6. salsa dancing
    7. working at the women’s center at my college

  10. Discovering that life has more for me than I imagined. Getting a free haircut at Aveda and having my boyfriend do a double-rainbow freakout over how much he loves it. Smiling at people on the bus. Sharing a vegan meal with good people.

  11. I can be in the worst mood ever, and then I go hang out with a bunch of little kids who love me and I temporarily forget why I was upset in the first place.

    Also:

    Chocolate, laughing hysterically with my roommate after an intense heart-to-heart, hugs, funny tv shows/movies that I don’t feel guilty for watching, passing as a guy, and getting picture messages of my little sister and my goddaughter.

  12. I’m a teacher, and yesterday I had one of those miraculous days when things go ‘click’ in class. At the end of a great discussion, as I was gathering up my things, I had a student come up to me and say: “It’s all connected, isn’t it? All of it. And it’s huge.” I nodded and smiled and she took a deep breath and walked out of class.

    That magic moment, when you realize all 40 of them are looking at you. That moment when you say something that makes them think, start putting things together, reach outside their box.

    The days I find something in an archive, cook a fantastic meal, or have a great workout are wonderful too. They make me happy. But days like yesterday — they’re why I’m doing this. They’re deeply happy.

  13. My boyfriend 🙂
    d’awww that’s so cute I’m sure it makes you want to vomit.
    (it’s tru thou)

    my job! How about that? I like my job.

    Funny videos & pictures

    my favorite kind of music performed well

    a full stomach & well-stocked refrigerator

    receiving presents & when people remember my birthday

  14. When one of my kids comes out with something totally off the wall and bizarre.

    Sitting on my front porch with my guitar

    Living near the water

    Being able to take my kids in public knowing that they won’t act like little hooligans.

    Driving

    Breakfast cereal

    Painting

  15. A clean apartment.

    Cuddling with someone I genuinely want to cuddle with.

    Playing drinking Scattergories with the best people I’ve ever met <3

    Hearing a business school professor say "he or she" without being prompted.

    These bubbles in a Mickey Mouse-shaped pumpkin container that were only 99 cents. I bought four so that my friends and I can share, and they don't know yet 🙂

  16. In any order–
    My husband rubbing my feet
    When I finally *get* something about/in the language I’m learning
    Borzoi running and doing crazy dances
    Mountains
    Driving with the windows down on a sunny day, late in the afternoon when the cottonwood blow is drifting through the air
    Being alone
    Being with my very best friends and laughing like hyenas
    Swimming in the sea or a warm river

  17. My beautiful, wonderful, glorious daughters.
    Jane Austen.
    Chocolate.
    Watching the 1971 BBC adaptation of War and Peace with my lovely partner.
    The blossom on the quince tree that I planted last winter.

  18. The incredibly delicious latte I just drank, as a symbol of me making a peaceful moment of happy productivity on what could have been a stressful, pain-in-the-ass day.

    The unexpectedly gorgeous view from my hole-in-the-wall apartment. Here’s to strategic reflective surfaces.

  19. 1. My partner, especially when He calls other people out on their fail, not to please me, but because it pisses Him off too.
    2. Snuggles.
    3. Walking into a room and having four children run up and want cuddles because they’re so excited to see me.
    4. Ranting about the mental health system at work, and how broken it is, and being taken seriously.
    5. Being called awesome by someone on twitter.

    This is such a cool idea, I’m gonna post it on my blog ^_^

  20. Good books that make me lose track of time.
    the chillier weather. Autumn is my favorite season.
    The farmer’s market, in any season.
    Cooking for, and eating with, my sweetie.
    The many goofy nicknames my sweetie has for me.
    Triple word scores in Scrabble.
    Doing social media campaigns and watching the hits come in.
    Anything that makes me laugh.
    Adorable cats.

  21. –long car rides on frosty December evenings as I gaze out the window at the glimmering lights of Christmas decorations.

    –listening to muffled, static-interrupted music on the car radio that scans stations on long dusty road trips through the country.

    –sliding down the stair rail to open the door.

    –chocolate-covered strawberries.

    –the sound of wind chimes as I watch plants grow from paper cups at my window.

    –the sound of the rain outside as I throw off my socks and jump into bed with a novel.

    –running up the stairs to open the windows and letting in the whole enormousness of the pure silent blue sky.

    –dark blue indigo jeans that fit just right.

    –sweaterdresses

    –the rush on Eid morning—the hurried shuffling of dresses and tinkling of jewelry and laughter as we align for prayers leading the festivities.

    –reading poetry under the stars and watching the sunrise with no shoes on.

    –Ramadan evenings outside the masj’id on Ruby Avenue where we watch the lights in the mountains from the high wood box with benches.

    –dancing on the roof.

    –running barefooted through knee-high grasses of yellow.

    –reading kids’ notebooks.

    –the damp air of rain bringing out the smell of shampoo in my hair.

    –sitting near a window open by candlelight while Beethoven plays on the radio as I think of philosophy.

    –those old, slow love songs that remind of years ago when my mother would ring them out loudly from our living room radio.

    –connotative meanings that change along with the translation of language, no matter how annoying and difficult it can be; I love how it forces me to think with a different schema and see with a diverse and wonderful point of view.

    –having friends over for omelets with tomatoes and onions and green peppers in the morning and talking over wide subjects.

    –dictionaries.

    –watching the city lights and cars rushing over the freeway from my high bedroom window.

    –feeling fingers stroke through my hair.

    –possibly more

  22. -Teaching kids music- over a hundred 10-11 year olds crammed on stage with instruments that are bigger than them, all listening, working together, and making music. Nothing gives me more positive energy than working with kids.
    – Playing music
    – My dog
    – My boyfriend
    – The company of good friends
    – Really good sushi

    That list feels so complete I can’t think of anything else.

  23. Winning an argument. Mad Men. Buying books. Lipstick. Multiple orgasms. Getting compliments. Wes Anderson. Good sex. The Collected Stories of Amy Hempel. Skipping class. Naked people. Getting mail. New clothes. A Softer World. Paychecks. Bright Star. Sex dreams.

  24. -History anything and everything about it, my day does not feel complete if I don’t learn anything from it

    -Reading books

    -Playing guitar

    -Singing while I play guitar, despite my inability to sing in key or the right notes

    -Talking to my girlfriend everything about her makes me mushy

  25. Medea: Doing something well.  

    Yep. That.

    And having enough money to pay bills, plus a few extras like a nice meal or outing.

    (Not asking for a private helicopter, a yacht or a private jet – I’ve learned not to need a great wardrobe, a big shoe collection, vacations in the tropics, etc. – but life without at least some indulgence is bleak. I’m not one of those survivor-resistance-fighters you see in the movies like Terminator or Children of Men or Resident Evil. If ever I was in that situation I would react more like the alluded-to wife in The Road, by Cormac McCarthy).

  26. Arriving at Feministe to lurk on some comment threads and then finding this little post at the top made me happy.

    In no particular order, I also enjoy a tall glass of water, black beans, my cat, thick socks, the abundance of crisp fall apples where I live, running fast, rhetorical criticism, the precise moment when you unplug the drain because the dishes are done, and brushing my teeth.

  27. remembering my dreams. and today, the dream I had last night, in which i met michael stipe at a gas station, and it’s funny because I WAS DREAMING ABOUT REM WHILE I WAS IN REM

    ….dorky things. literary devices.

  28. Cuna: Love songs that are non-gender-specific!  

    QFT!

    also:
    Kissing
    Hugs
    Cuddles
    Holding Hands
    Yeah… I’ve been feeling like a bit of a romantic lately. Oh well 🙂

  29. Cuddling with my cats (aka my babies, who are still in nyc…so hard to be away from them).

    Going up into the mountains.

    Making art. Drawing, painting, etc.

    Laying in sunshine. In a pretty garden or park.

    Swimming in a lake or ocean. Taking the A to the Rockaways with my girlfriend/partner and swimming in the ocean.

    Salsa dancing.

    When my sweetie makes me breakfast.

    Love.

  30. And my friends, back in NYC, who I met through organizing (LGBTGNC economic justice sex workers rights etc.) and who are amazing.

  31. Every day I am happy to be living my dream by going to grad school for a career that I love, and to be living in my home state where all the produce is local and fresh.

  32. Ooh, I like this!

    *my kitty
    *baking, especially when I conquer a new challenge like pie crust
    *my partner
    *crocheting/knitting
    *good food
    *coffee
    *sleeping in
    *fall!
    *mountains
    *orgasms
    *feeling like the cross-country move I just made is a good thing for my partner, for me, and for our relationship

  33. dinners discussing big ideas with a good friend.
    riding the train.
    taking pictures.
    getting a roll of film back.
    riding my bike.
    writing letters.

  34. Acting. Spending time with people I love. Anticipation. Hope. All things magical. The smell of new books. Connecting with people. Going to the cinema.

  35. Love, literature, scotch, and the misfortune of those I feel entitled to loath. Not necessarily in that order.

    Also, a Welsh Corgi doing almost anything. I’m only human.

  36. Anything that invokes tranquility.

    For example, listening to early morning rain while I’m in bed, when I know don’t have anywhere to be that day.

  37. Marksman2010: Anything that invokes tranquility.

    For example, listening to early morning rain while I’m in bed, when I know don’t have anywhere to be that day. Marksman2010

    Ooo….yes like the morning rain on the windward side staring out of my bedroom windows at the Ko’olaus watching the waterfalls form…*sigh*…Great…now I’m homesick…good job… 🙂

  38. Being appreciated at work.

    Cool(er) weather (finally!) in New Orleans.

    Honest, positive conversations with the people I care about.

    Meeting new people and figuring them out.

    Awesome vegan food.

  39. That moment when you wake up at seven, peer out from under the duvet and groan at the thought of getting up… before realising that it’s Saturday!

    Also: Agatha Christie thrillers, toddlers, accomplishment, knitwear (making and wearing), really good hugs, citalopram.

  40. Boyfriend. My friends. Tea. Latte Macchiato. Raspberry-lemon muffins. Making muffins. Finding a gift for someone that’s just right. A book in bed.

  41. i’ve been unhappy for so long i’m not even sure i know. i love spending time with my kids, family, friends…etc. but when i’m alone the demons come home to roost and i find myself wallowing in a self-imposed pity party.

    i suppose it’s time for a change. embarking on heart break to achieve the happiness that has eluded me for so long.

    what a journey…

  42. The look that she gives me – the woman I’ve been pursuing for months now – when even at a party with a lot of our friends, for a moment it’s just us and she takes my hand and we’re dancing and she says with her eyes that there’s nowhere else she’d rather be than here with me.

    The realization that the weather is gorgeous, my ipod has a new playlist, and I’ve got two or three hours to go on my drive.

    Getting a grade back on an exam, getting upset it’s a low A, then realizing “Hey, it’s still a damn good grade. Way to go me.”

    When one of the guys in the office says “Hey, want to come play cards with us tonight?” and knowing that he’s not just being nice because I’m the new girl, he’s nice because there are people who are just nice and friendly.

    Realizing that, even if it’ll be hard, I have an actual plan for what I want to do with my life and am taking meaningful steps towards getting there.

    Seeing people apologize and learn a lesson after being called out on one form of ism-based bullshit or another. Seeing those same people do things to show they’re just a bit more aware and just a bit less assholish in the future.

    Writing this list.

    Also random internet pictures of kittens.

  43. Living, working, learning and studying in an intellectually stimulating environment even when it seems that law school will kill me before I graduate.

    Being in the healthiest, calmest, best relationship I think I’ve had yet.

    My ferrets doing something adorable (which is all the time.

    Discovering that I’ve done something really well.

    Being reminded that I may, in fact, be able to become one of those lucky people who gets to do what they love for a living.

    Randomly just saying “Monkey!” …

    And monkeys.

  44. Sleeping in, all the while looking at my alarm clock as I snuggle deeper into my sheets.

    Sitting in the warm sun.

    Reading.

    Having my SO take my breath away.

    Kittens.

  45. I’m the receptionist at an opera company, and the two romantic leads of the current production are standing in the lobby next to my desk, having a conversation. They’re adorable, friendly, and super talented, and I’m grinning like a star-struck fool.

  46. The scar on my knee from when I fell down laughing. It’s purple.
    Writing dumb poems that could only ever mean anything to me.
    Writing a poem that turns out to be alright.
    Rivers. Oh my God, rivers.
    Need I even say music?

  47. In no particular order:
    My boyfriend.
    My job (usually) and the bizarre lunchtime conversations I have with colleagues.
    Books.
    New stationery.
    Goth boots.
    Cake.
    Knitting.
    The fact that one of the fandoms I’m involved in isn’t full of sexist jerks.
    Those conversations you have as a party is winding down and you’re sobering up, where you learn more about your friends than you do at any other time.
    Trees.

  48. – the rare days when i don’t feel depressed
    – my boyfriend
    – listening to good music
    – especially listening to NOFX
    – seeing a band i like and going bananas
    – the days when i don’t have class and work and can just study in peace
    – getting good grades
    – days when my hair looks nice.

  49. In no particular order:
    -my cats
    -my boyfriend
    -my friends
    -my family
    -books!
    -vegan junk food
    -Alone time thinking

  50. Spicy, smokey red wine.
    Teaching linguistics.
    Bikram.
    Having both my family AND my birthmom (and her family) in my life.
    My friends + amazing beer + any place.
    Orgasms.
    Anything involving fresh basil.
    Sexy fuzzy male persons with some degree of oppositional personality disorder (hey, we all have our things).
    The freedom I found in of atheism.
    Thunderstorms.
    My perfect ass (as in, I think it’s perfect, and I fucking love it).
    Pembroke welsh corgis.
    Being at a club, dancing, and hearing a hip-hop song that I forgot that I loved – and dancing to it.
    The beautiful harmony that is Jackson Heights, Queens, which restores my faith in humanity every day.

  51. *Breath- 1
    *the Universe -2
    *LOVE -3

    1- finding inner piece, and reconnecting with my breath keeps me sane and HAPPY!
    2- thinking BIG, and imagining how vast our reality is, keeps all of my worries in check and down to earth. – thus i’m HAPPY.
    3- remembering any random act of kindness… from friends, family or that certain loved one – ;). Whenever I falter, I think of those that believe in me and that makes me HAPPY. And in those really bleak moments, when all the negativity of my work gets me down and the direct love I have encountered isn’t enough…
    I imagine the selfless deeds people have done to make another person HAPPY.

    This is what makes me a self-proclaimed HAPPY FEMINIST. 🙂

  52. I love this so much.

    A beer or glass of wine, or two or three. Chocolate. My apartment in the mornings, with music playing and the sun pouring in. Watching the cat I’ve had for 5 months grow her own silly, sweet personality. Reading a book that keeps me up all night. The way the trees look in autumn; the way the trees look in the spring; the way the trees look in summer. The way the trees look in the winter when they’re slick with hoarfrost. The beautiful, brilliant women I know. Art. Feeling free. Sex – including masturbating.

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