Spoilers below the image!
This week on LOST, a candidate is finally chosen, Smokey continues his murderous spree, and Sideways Desmond continues his creepy maneuvering. Share your thoughts on the episode and remaining predictions in the comments. But no spoilers for the finale!
This was the last episode before the finale. Reactions?
JILL: I liked it a lot better than last week’s. They’re finally getting around to answering some of the bigger questions (or at least kind of answering them). And I know everyone is mad about people getting killed, but I’m bloodthirsty — I like that they’re just offing dudes left and right.
SADY: I’m sorry, I can’t answer these worldly questions. I am too busy converting to Jacktheism. For yea, Jack is our redeemer; he guideth us through the valley; he stalketh us until we relenteth and doeth whatever he wanteth; for the Obvious Plot Cues did come to announce his ascendance, and lo, The Script did fulfill them. Jack hath transcended the world, and now guideth us… oh, what the fuck. Sun and Jin? And Sayid? And Eko, and Libby, and Juliet, and Daniel Faraday who was MY FAVORITE, and fuck, even CHARLIE who I DIDN’T REALLY LIKE, dead? FOR THIS???? Damn it. Don’t call an episode “What They Died For” unless you have a good reason as to what they, you know, died for. Because right now the reason is (a) a mystic light-hole, and (b) Jack, and I am NOT PLEASED WITH THAT AT ALL.
LAUREN: Meh. I think I’ve come to the realization that I wouldn’t have been able to sustain interest in this show for six years. Right out of the gate this was a great show about bigger issues, like post-9/11 life in the U.S., the fallacies of so-called utopias, the ethics (or lack thereof) of kidnapping and torture in the name of security, the limitations of reason and faith, but now that the central issues that began this show with so much promise have been stretched through the life of the show, we’re left with heavy-handed script machinations about, what? Light-holes of truth that must be protected, really? Really, LOST? Really?
I just… don’t care. Thank Baby Jesus for Netflix.
SALLY: I am… not sure how I feel about this episode. I think I liked it more than last week, but I can’t really figure out why… Actually, I know why! ANA LUCIA! YAAAAAY! Okay, that’s not the only reason, but an awesomely awesome part of it!
CARA: Well yeah, it was better than last week. But as the second to last episode in the series ever, it really needed to be better than “better than last week.”
Richard was swiftly done away with, using the same sensitivity granted to Lapidus. Thoughts?
CARA: I’ve developed a new theory about how they kill people on LOST. Not only are race and gender a factor — country of origin and number of languages spoken also count. Notice how Sayid, Sun, and Jin weren’t all just non-white, but also spoke English as a second language? Well, Richard was not just a Latino man, he was also from the Canary Islands and spoke two other languages, Spanish and Latin! He simply had to go.
So, my prediction is that Claire — who was nowhere to be found, this episode — will die next, as a woman and non-American. Then it’s Hurley, since he’s Latino and speaks Spanish. Next comes Miles, since he’s not white but only speaks English. Kate will go last, because she’s hot. Then, with all of those boring characters out of the way, Jack and Sawyer can appropriately do battle with Flocke and Ben! Hooray!
Less sarcastically: I’m pissed. Just like Sayid deserved better than an Artz exit, Richard deserved better than Monster Eats the Pilot.
JILL: Yeah, I agree that the important characters do deserve better deaths. I mean, compared to Richard, Sayid got great treatment! And they need to not just leave the white dudes. But should they start killing some more of the white guys, and we end up in the last half hour with like 3 people left, I’m ok with that. Kill ’em all! Except Lapidus. Bring Lapidus back, please.
LAUREN: Richard died suddenly, yes, but Zoe was cut like a suckling pig and Widmore was downed without any remorse whatsoever. All three deaths in this episode were callous and brutal, so it seems to amp up the last few moments before the finale. I’m cool with our beloveds dying suddenly as long as they get their due in the finale. We’ll see if there’s a way for them to have a collective swan song for characters like Sayid, the Kwons, Charlie, et al, without resorting to a Rocky IV-style montage WHICH I AM CALLING RIGHT NOW.
SADY: I mean… Richard can’t die, though! Like, literally cannot do it. It’s been established multiple times. Are we even sure he’s dead?
CARA: We established that he can’t kill himself. That’s a different thing. I want Richard to be alive! But I also kept really wanting for Lapidus to come out of the water during the extended and pointless scene where the remaining Losties kept staring out at it. So.
SALLY: Yeah, ummm, I’m completely NOT okay with Richard just being offed like that. And how exactly did Miles get away? Or did he die off-screen? I’m almost more upset about the way they killed Richard than Sayid (almost, though not quite), simply because at least this season, Richard got a whole episode and he was quite likable whereas we were supposed to (maybe?? who knows anymore) not like/trust Sayid anymore since he was all smokified. You need to at least give these people meaningful deaths, LOST!
Ben has seemingly gone back to the dark side — he’s working with Smokey, willingly sacrificed Zoe, and personally killed Widmore. He’s also offering himself to work as Smokey’s hitman. Are we going to see yet another showdown between Jack and Ben?
CARA: I have to say, this actually made me really sad. I liked Ben better as a complex person, rather than someone who is just pure evil. Also, I was totally buying the redemption storyline, which makes me feel like a giant sucker! I’m still partially hoping that Ben has a trick up his sleeve, and he doesn’t have real plans to sacrifice our remaining Losties the way he did in Zoe and Widmore. But it’s looking unlikely to me.
Also, some “rules” those are, Ben! “You know I can’t kill you, Charles.” Except when I really feel like it! Bam!
SADY: Oh, Ben is playing Locke, all the way. They wouldn’t make a point of how great and nice and cuddly and good he is, in the alterna-world, if they had plans to just let him stab all the non-Jack characters to death in the finale.
CARA: I hope so! Though at the same time, Ben stabbing all of the other characters to death would be a pretty hilarious ending to the show, actually. Last frame is him wiping his knife off on his pants, turning around, and walking way. Cue black screen and BOOM!
LAUREN: Ben is conning Smokey, I think. He’s either Smokey’s greatest weapon, and a clever nod to our old manipulative Henry Gale, or is conning Smokey as an ally of the island. I don’t think Ben wants the island to himself, as Smokey promised, because the thing is wrecked and everyone he loved is gone thanks to it.
SALLY: I also think Ben has something up his sleeve, not necessarily because I don’t think he can’t suddenly go back to the dark side, but more because he ALWAYS has an agenda! Like, all the time! Even when we think he’s gotten what he wants! So if he suddenly doesn’t, I’d be really confused.
I also thought it was hilarious that he killed Widmore, mostly because Widmore has annoyed the crap out of me this season. And just like Ben to do it while he’s in the middle of some great confession.
CARA: Personally, I’m really, REALLY annoyed with the constant “your daughter’s life is my bargaining chip and also my revenge!” trope that the show keeps pulling out. I mean, clearly we’re supposed to view that as pretty evil, but I don’t think we’re supposed to see the misogyny behind it. Probably because the writers don’t. It’s like “haha, you killed my property daughter, so now your property daughter must die to even things out!” is a totally logical reaction.
But can we also just talk about Sideways Ben for a second? Because I have to say that the Ben/Rousseau romance is the greatest thing to happen all season. It seriously thrilled me.
SADY: Haha, yeah. At first I thought it was way too obvious, like my least favorite parts of the Sideways World sequence (like, they literally have Rousseau saying, “even if we have to kidnap you” and “you’re the closest thing she has to a father,” like we the viewers are just TOO TERMINALLY STUPID to remember the past six seasons of the show and get the irony) but when they started giving each other sexy glances? I was like, whoa! Hey! The two weirdest people on the show, getting together! I did not see that coming.
LAUREN: Yeah, I wonder, too — Ben is like the only one whose sideways life is totally kickass, so what if he decides Sideways is the way to be and goes all Fuck Team Jacob?
SALLY: I LOVE BENSSEAU, which is what I shall call them. I totally think he needs to ditch the island and somehow stay in Sideways World!
Off island, Desmond is still making sure that various Losties connect with each other, and Hurley seems to fully remember the other reality. Everyone also seems headed to the same concert/gala event. Where is this going?
JILL: They’re going to a concert put on by Miles’ father (whose name I can’t remember now, but you know, the Dharma guy). Which makes sense, since we learned he’s a composer or musician or something, right? I think this is heading toward the universes finally converging — once they’re all together, the hope is that they’ll all “see” the island, because the only one who seems to have it all figured out right now is Hurley. Although my prediction is that getting them all together will also mean, somehow, that the people on the island will be able to see their possible alternate lives in LA. And I think that’ll change Jack’s mind about being The One. And Faraday or Desmond will somehow figure out how to skip the island back in time or do whatever magical Ferngully/Bibley/sciencey thing they do and make it so that the plane lands and Bizarro LA ends up being Real LA. And maybe someone — maybe Kate, as I say below — will end up staying on the island instead of Jack.
But my theories are always wrong, so, if you’re making your own I would suggest repeating everything I just wrote and then saying, “And that is what is definitely not going to happen.”
LAUREN: They will all go to a concert, wherein Miles’ dad will play a classical cover of some Drive Shaft song so the production scene can put together a loving montage of best-of moments as the characters gain consciousness of both time lines. *cough*
SADY: I really love creepy-prophet/secret-agent Desmond. I get kind of bored with the character sometimes — I seem to have established that I like the characters no-one else likes, and don’t get the characters people love, when it comes to this show; Hurley is like the only dude on which we are all in agreement that he’s great — but he has really found a groove of creepy impressiveness that is working for me. Also: Kate’s reaction when she saw the dress! I don’t often have nice things to say about Evangeline Lilly, which is a shame, because it’s not like SHE wrote Kate to be so annoying, but when she held up the dress and noticed that it was (a) kinda skimpy, and (b) her size, she had this hilarious “UHHHHH YIKES?” face. And I laughed. Good job, Evangeline! You got me to like Kate, and all the writers had to do was get out of the way and make you not say any of their annoying, we-don’t-know-how-to-write-for-women-y words!
Oh, also: Ana-Lucia! I missed youuuuuu. I am going to continue my “disastrous LOST confessions” theme, actually, and tell you all that I always liked Ana-Lucia A LOT. Mostly because I really like Michelle Rodriguez. She’s so charismatic! I could just listen to her yell for hours! And, during Season 2, I DID.
SALLY: ANA LUCIA, I MISSED YOU AS WELL!
Oh, theories, so I’m guessing that they’ll all be in the same room and somehow the room will EXPLODE and then they’ll all be dead.
OR! Some combination of everyone else’s theories.
Also, if we could get Shannon and/or Eko to be at the concert too, that’d be fantabulous. Simply because I need closure and seeing them again and knowing what happens to them in Sideways World would be wonderful.
On the island, Jacob finds his replacement, and in the big shocker of the night, we find out that it’s Jack.
LAUREN: *dies of boredom*
CARA: Just when you think that LOST is out of twists and turns, they hit us with this shocker! Who could’ve guessed?
I also love that Jacob’s explanation to Sawyer’s perfectly reasonable question about why he thought it was okay to disrupt all their normal lives for the sake of a glowy light in the middle of an island is, “well, you were all miserable, anyway! Also, flawed!” And then everyone kind of looks at the ground guiltily, like “yeah, he has a point.” Because clearly having things kind of suck for them totally justifies Sayid, Sun, Jin, Charlie, Boone, Shannon, Ana Lucia, Michael, Libby, Locke, Eko and everyone else ALL BEING DEAD NOW.
SALLY: My guy pointed out that he hated this answer because, aren’t millions of other people also miserable, lonely and flawed? What makes these people especially miserable, lonely and flawed? It seems that, in the grand scheme of things, some of their lives weren’t all that awful.
CARA: Well, exactly. Picking people who are “flawed” doesn’t exactly narrow down the selection pool.
JILL: I did appreciate Sawyer’s God Complex joke when that happened. But now that it’s Jack taking over Jacob’s role in the second-to-last episode (SHOCKER!), I think one of two things are going to happen: (1) It’s not going to end up being Jack who stays as the caretaker of the island; or (2) No one stays on the island, and somehow they figure out a way to leave it or disappear it or whatever so that they all get to go home. I think it will come down to some sort of show-down between Jack and Locke, obviously, but the end end won’t be Jack staying. In fact, if someone does stay, I think it’s gotta be Kate. Because in Bizarro LA, everyone has a pretty decent life going — except Kate. I mean, Sayid is in jail too, but his overall circumstances aren’t the worst. And Sun is shot, but maybe will be ok? Kate is the only one who, in Bizarro LA, has the same kind of life that she had before coming to the island — flawed and pointless. Jack is a dad, though, and when the universes converge — and I think that they will — I don’t think he’ll agree to stay on the island and forgo a life with his son.
SADY: But I say unto you, Jill, it is not given to us to question the Assumption of Jack into godhood; Jack hath been selected from among us by The Writers, who do not giveth a fuck that he be the most loathed of all their creation. For the viewership did cry out to The Writers, “Kill him! Let his blood be shed on the ground!” And The Writers said, “No.” And the viewers did cry out, “we prefer Hurley! Let him be chosen to lead us!” And the writers said, “No.” And the viewers said, “You have brought among us great suffering; you have slain our women, and cast out from among us the people of color, exploding and/or drowning three in one episode, for which we have not ceased our mourning; your only gay character hath been a villain, who hath not even been in that many episodes; you have suffered smoke monsters, and fire, and sea, and Ana-Lucia, to lay waste to those we loved. And yet among us, Jack is still standing, though we have cried out unto you he is a douche. Why must this be so? Why is Jack chosen from among us to be the Messiah?” And The Writers said, “lo, he is a white dude. And those ALWAYS have to be the heroes, silly!” And the viewers did lose their faith in this show.
SALLY: As Jack got christened or whatever one would call such a ceremony, I actually starting thinking to myself “could there possibly be people out there, other than the writers, who actually still LIKE Jack as a character?” Because, most everyone I know finds Jack annoying, at the very least, or just plain hate him. But anyway, my second favorite moment of the night (Ana Lucia was my first, of course) was when Hurley was all shocked that everyone could see Jacob because he seemed equal parts hurt/useless and happy/relieved. Oh, Hurley, I love you so!
CARA: My thoughts during the “You’re like me, now” scene were: “You were already like each other. You’re both monster douchebags.” Then, it was, “You were already like each other. You both lack intellectual curiosity to astounding and terrifying degrees.” I mean, Jack was just like “uh huh, uh huh, magical light cave that I need to protect from the magical smoke column for as many centuries as I can before inevitably being killed, mhm, drink the magical lake water, anything else?” Like, what? At least mini-Jacob and mini-Esau asked what the damn light cave was! They weren’t told, but they had the sense to ask.
He also tells us why Kate was no longer a candidate: Because she became a mother. How many things did you smash?
JILL: I wanted to smash something for a minute, but then he was like, “It’s just a line in chalk on a cave.” Ok, so it’s meaningless?! Awesome. I at least liked that part of the answer.
CARA: I’m annoyed. First of all, I feel like they just made this up completely. Like: “Okay, we’ve got 7 last names, only 6 numbers. Oops, we forgot the girl! Hmm, what’s an explanation for why the girl isn’t one of the numbers? Oh, I KNOW! SOMETHING THAT APPLIES ONLY TO WOMEN!”
I mean, first of all, what does that even mean? Jacob didn’t feel the need to elaborate on why becoming a mother got you the chalk line. Is it because she had someone else to take care of? Because the candidates all had to be flawed, and everyone knows that mothers are on the Madonna side of the Madonna/Whore complex? Because being a mother is something only ladies do? I can’t find a way for it to not be offensive and misogynistic. Secondly, if becoming a mother crosses you off, then clearly Sun wasn’t the candidate either, and the candidates were all dudes! Also, being a father clearly doesn’t get you crossed off, as Sawyer has a kid (even if he ignores her), and one of the Kwons had to be in the running, so clearly Jin’s fatherhood doesn’t count, either.
LAUREN: This was a weirdly anti-mother way for the story to go, not just a sexist or even merely inconsistent explanation of motherhood on this island, especially considering the negative mother figures that the show has had, like Eloise and the ur-Mother, and the close-but-no-cigar, could’ve-been-but-died-first mothers. This show to date has erected numerous pedestals for mothers to perch on only to be knocked down. And it’s telling, too, that a show so obsessed with the concept of motherhood can be so dismissive of women in general — and mothers in particular — as agents in the story.
SADY: Yeah. We were meant to think that it was some Nice Dude Move on Jacob’s part — like, “oh, you have something to care for outside of the Island, now, so clearly my petty little Eternal Struggle for Life and Death should not take time away from that” — but it really didn’t work, considering that THIRTY SECONDS AGO Kate talked about JIN AND SUN BEING DEAD and TWENTY MINUTES BEFORE THAT she made note of the fact that they had A DAUGHTER, who Jin never even saw outside of The Manipulative Digital Camera of Charles Widmore. So, not only is it a little sexist (and rules out Sun as a candidate, for which: FUCK YOUUUUU, LOST) it doesn’t even make sense by the show’s own internal logic.
Oh, wait. We’re talking about Lost. Which has no internal logic, actually! So I guess we’re fine!
SALLY: I felt that him crossing off Kate because she became a mother has something to do with his own mother. Maybe he thought she’d start killing people or something in order to protect the island? Or maybe he thought that she’d pass her Godliness to her child which, apparently, is not cool because suddenly choice is important in this whereas, up to this point, it was totally Jacob’s random decision. So, yeah, totally anti-mother, totally still part of their incredibly offensive views, but I guess, in their minds, justified somehow?
It’s clear at this point that Jacob really cared about his mother, so maybe he sees other women as flawed because of her own flaws. I’m assuming she’s the only woman who was completely close with. I also wonder if that’s why women can’t have children on the island?? Because of his own need to not have history repeat itself??? I don’t know, that just came to me right now, so I’d have to ponder that some more. Or, you know, wait until LOST tells me, if they ever do.
Smokey wants to destroy the island, and wants Desmond to help him do it. Predictions as to how this will go down?
LAUREN: All we know here is that Desmond, as the failsafe, with his unnatural ability to resist the effects of electromagnetism, can be used as the last resort against Smokey if all the other candidates die. Right? Because I’m confused. Maybe Desmond will go diving into the light-hole or employ some other such mystical force against/for Smokey in order to save/destroy the island.
Although Ol’ Smokey is right: if any ass left on this island would want to destroy the island, it’s Desmond circa Season Two.
SALLY: I’m really annoyed about this part of the storyline because it was abandoned weeks ago and even in Widmore’s explanation, nothing is really explained. Yeah, he can resist electromagnetism – we knew that. What the hell does that have to do with anything?
And how, exactly, does Smokey figure Desmond will suddenly trust him after he pushed him down a well and sent Sayid to kill him? It amazes me how Smokey’s mind works…
And lastly, any other thoughts before the big finale on Sunday?
JILL: I am keeping a running list of questions in my head that I hope they answer. These include: (1) Walt. What the hell is up with Walt? (2) Polar bears. What the hell is up with all the polar bears? (3) North Africa. Why does Morocco/Tunisia seem to be the place people land when they get off the island? And what the hell was with Charlotte finding that Dharma/polar bear skeleton? (4) Why exactly is the island traveling through time again, and can we please get some Daniel Faraday up in here? (5) Why does Widmore care about the island again?
CARA: Yeah … I don’t think they’re answering any of that, actually? Ha. (Though I think the polar bear being in Tunisia means that at some point a polar bear moved the island. Which is weird! But … yeah.) My big question is about why pregnant women die on the island. That is something they spent a lot of time on, and which I absolutely demand an answer to. Because if they don’t have an answer for that, it basically means that they killed a whole bunch of women in the show’s mythology for no damn reason (and true, we didn’t know those women, but still), and secondly, that they basically just decided, “Hey, we need a story line for Sun this season! Hmm … well, she’s a woman. So we should make sure it has to do with woman things. Oh! I’ve got it! What if we make it so that Sun has the constant threat of inevitable death hanging over her head, just because she is a woman?” All with no greater point. But with all that said … I’m not really expecting an answer to that, either. It seems highly unlikely, at this point, and then I’m going to be pissed.
I don’t know, I feel like a huge party pooper. But at the beginning of the season, I was super, super sad that LOST was ending. Now, I’m just really, really sad that I’m not sad about the show ending, and just kind of relieved to have it over. I wanted this season to be a lot more than it has turned out to be. I wanted the characters I care about to be treated a lot more humanely than they have been. And I wanted the entire show to be about a whole lot more than a magical, glowing light that is never explained. I’m just disappointed, and while I still really hope that they somehow blow me away on Sunday, I’m not holding my breath.
LAUREN: Ditto, Cara, on feeling like a party pooper. And yet one final prediction, although none of my priors have come true: Jack will die and Kate will save the day. I really, really want Desmond to be my constant, and Kate to be my Ellen Ripley.
SALLY: Yeah, I’m kind of ready for this season to be over and REALLY hoping they can make up for this season in the finale.
Today my friend asked me, what was up with Dharma? Which made me realize that we never really did get any resolution on that… Why exactly were they on the island, how did they get there, etc.? I thought we had all of the Dharma answers when Eloise explained most of it, but then everything this season has me a bit confused on whether or not that’s true because, if so, shouldn’t there be some acknowledgment about that in this new Jacob storyline? Was it because Jacob summoned them as he supposedly did with a bunch of other people? If that’s the case, then why did he treat them differently than the “Others”? And, also, why did it seem like they actually knew more about the island than Jacob?? Did Jacob not realize that ever? They knew how the island moved, all the superpowers it held, etc. but it doesn’t seem Jacob’s ever been that interested in any of that which, if he’s trying to protect the island, wouldn’t he want to know how some of that might help his cause? I don’t understand!!!
I’d love the pregnant women thing to be answered because, if not, I’m going to stick with my theory above. I’d also like some sort of LOST-approved timeline to come out once the series is over because I’m really freaking confused about the sequence of some events over the years. I don’t really remember many of my other questions at this point…
SADY: For unto the viewers, there was given one last shred of hope, and they did cling to it with all their will and power. Was it not shown unto them, in the season premiere, that the Island had been consigned to the depths of the sea? And was it not told unto them by Smokey that he would lay waste to the Island, and deliver it unto oblivion? And could it not be, in this time of peril, that the protector of the Island might stay with it even unto its sinking? Could it not be true, thought the viewers unto themselves, that Jack would pass away as the Island itself, and there would be a new Heaven and a new Earth, with no cryface and no stalking, a world in which JACK WOULD FINALLY FUCKING DIE? And the Writers said, “ha. Probably not, though! But rest assured that, no matter what we deliver unto you, it shall be a disappointment.” So endeth the prophecy.