Now if you’re under 18 in some states, you aren’t only blocked from controlling your own reproductive system, but from even deciding what your naughty bits look like. That’s right, Missouri teens might have to get written parental permission to get a Brazilian bikini wax.
The bill, which the Missouri governor is expected to sign, says that “The written informed consent of a minor’s parent or legal guardian… must be obtained prior to providing body waxing on or near the genitalia.” But my question is, how does this only limit Brazilian waxes? Any bikini wax inevitably comes “near the genitalia,” right? (I’m asking this question rhetorically. The answer is yes, it does.)
It shouldn’t come as a surprise that this bill is targeted at limiting adolescent female sexuality, since the Brazilian can apparently “double the pleasure” of receiving oral sex (I wonder how they calculated that?). The whole thing is ridiculous, but the article is at least a funny read. It includes such gems as, ““We use a wax substance specifically made for [Brazilian waxing],” says Chris Duello, marketing director for The Face & The Body, a Clayton day spa that offers the procedure for $60. “It tends to be very sticky.” While explaining how waxing works (“The hair,” notes Duello, “is stuck in the wax, the wax is stuck in the muslin, and as you pull it backwards it removes the hair from the follicles”), the journalist adds, “With one stern rip and a few days of healing, the pubic area and butt crack are as fresh as the morning dew and remain so for a couple of months.”
Am I the only one who enjoys seeing the words “buttcrack” and “fresh as morning dew” in the same sentence? Unfortunately, though, he’s wrong — sure, you’re as fresh as morning dew, but waxes only last a few weeks, not a few months.
Can someone please give these people something else to do?
Some, like Twisty, take issue with Brazilians in the first place (but still don’t support consent laws). Her view is worth a read. I also think that Brazilians are problematic, but, full disclosure (Dad or anyone else likely to be grossed out, stop reading now), I get them regularly. It’s not to look like a 13-year-old. It’s not for oral sex. It’s mostly because I really don’t like body hair, and I remove pretty much all of it — from my legs, my arms, my underarms, part of my eyebrows, etc. Do I make this choice without any sort of outside influence? Of course not. Few of our “choices” about our appearance are freely made, from wearing makeup and high heels (or not) to hair removal. I consider waxing to be one degree on that spectrum. I also recognize that Brazilian waxes are different, since detractors argue that they make your naked body look like a child’s (although to clarify, most Brazilians don’t remove all the hair). But couldn’t that exact same argument be used about shaving your underarms or legs?
But again, when it comes to pubic hair it does feel somehow “different.” I haven’t figured out a way to reconcile this. So, while I wax regularly and I do genuinely prefer it, I feel much more feminist guilt about getting Brazilians than I do about shaving my legs or wearing make-up. And while I’m glad to see that the issue of body hair removal is being discussed, I inevitably walk away feeling like a bad feminist.
And now that I’ve gotten off the topic of the original post, I’d love to hear other thoughts on the feminist politics of body hair — particularly pubic hair.
via my favorite patriarchy-blamer, via feministing.