Gina Barreca writes in the Chronicle of Higher Education about how women respond to and de-escalate sexist speech with humor, citing this famous exchange:
For example, after Liz Carpenter worked for the Johnson administration she wrote a book about her experiences working at the White House. The book was out for a while, did pretty well. One evening she met Arthur Schlesinger at a cocktail party. He came over to her and smiled and said “Like your book Liz. Who wrote it for you?”
Now, clearly dear Arthur meant this as his little joke. If she had stammered and blushed, he would win the point. He could then say, “see, you just can’t joke around with these women.” If she’d pounded her fist on the table and threatened to call a lawyer, he could say the same thing.
Instead what Carpenter did was to say in response, “Glad you liked it, Arthur. Who read it to you?”
In the comments at Barreca’s post, another reader offers this example:
…my sister was once walking home from her job working with the chronically unemployed, waiting at a street corner for the light to change. Suddenly, she felt a man, who turned out to be one of her clients, grab her hips from behind. He yelled “I want your ass,” loud enough to be heard by many of the people in the area.
My sister turned, looked at him, and calmly said “I’m not surprised. Every asshole needs a home.”
I love a zinger, especially because humor is one of the better ways to take the sting out of sexist and other oppressive commentary, but also because this kind of small, under-cutting speech is so goddamned common.
Heard any good jokes or comebacks lately?