In defense of the sanctimonious women's studies set || First feminist blog on the internet

Palestine, the UN, Israel, the Oslo Accords – & me, on Russian TV.

UPDATE: I’ve added a link with some basic background on the conflict in the comments.

When I introduced myself earlier in the week, I said that I write a lot about Israel/Palestine, but that I also write about a lot of other stuff as well. Given the nature of this blog, I led with some of that other stuff. On Tuesday, though, I had a chance to appear on Russia Today, the Russian English-language news channel (I know – I didn’t know either) to discuss the latest goings on in Israel/Palestine — so here we go, leaping into my somewhat more regular gig.

To anyone wondering what my background in this is, I’ll say briefly: I lived in Tel Aviv for 14 years, and have studied, reported on and written about the topic for 25 years. I’ve been an advocate for a two-state solution since the 1980s, and my area of academic and professional expertise is the contemporary Middle East. More details can be found at the top of this post and you can get a good feeling for the approach I take, my personal attachment and personal heartbreak, in this post, and this one. Beyond that, there’s a lot of material to be found poking around here.

As it is my contention that one of the biggest problems in this conflict is the failure on the parts of so many people to genuinely listen to and respect the humanity of those on the other side, I’m going to ask that if you respond here — even if with great disagreement and passion — that you try to succeed where the diplomats have failed, and show genuine respect for each other.

So the other day, something of a stink was made about the fact that Israel is talking about “canceling” the Oslo Accords if the Palestinians insist on going to the UN in September to ask for recognition as a state.

Only it doesn’t really seem that Israel is necessarily considering such a move with any seriousness — they’re just kicking around a few reeaally stupid, self-defeatist, panicky ideas. You know, like they do.

Anyhoo, after appearing on Russia Today in May to discuss the visit of Israeli Prime Minister Netanyahu and President Obama’s two speeches, I was asked back yesterday to talk about the new mess! And so, of course, I said yes. (Last time, I was worried I looked like a moron; this time, I’m more worried about looking like a cadaver. [LIGHTING! MAKEUP!] Whatevs. I manged to slip in the word “Jedi,” in a totally appropriate context, so I’m good).

After the jump you can see me on the teevee (and, I’m certain, you’ll notice that my focus and attention were really rather impressive, given all the stuff going on around me). After the clip (transcript at the bottom of the post), you’ll find a little compendium of links to the articles I scoured in a state of high tizz to make sure I sounded smart in the segment. Very little of it came into play in my 4+ minutes — for instance, I didn’t get a chance to mention that just this past Saturday, Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas said, and I quote, “Our first, second and third choice is to return to negotiations [over going to the UN]” — but hey! It’s all good. Smarter is better.

Read More…Read More…

There’s an app for that. (Yeah, I went there.)

The fight against violence against women has reached the Office of the Vice President–which is good, because there are a lot of other offices that would have let it sit in the foyer without even offering it a cup of coffee until it gave up and went home. Even better is the surprisingly modern approach Joe Biden is taking: He’s harnessing the power of crowdsourcing and the technology of smartphone apps in a contest called Apps Against Abuse, “envisioned to empower young people, in real time, to look out for their friends in order to prevent violence or assault before it occurs.”

To open: I think that’s pretty cool.

To continue: I think there are a lot of potential applications for women dealing with domestic violence. Apps that could connect with 911 from your home screen, help find both immediate and long-term assistance for women with kids, or even act as a kind of a live-man switch in particularly urgent situations could be helpful. (Of course, this assumes we can ensure that vulnerable women have access to smartphones, which we really can’t, so that becomes its own issue.)

To continue further: Raise your hand if you see the inherent weakness in this plan.

Unless there’s an app that could help a guy step in when one of his friends is about to rape someone–or help a guy recognize when he’s about to commit rape and stop in time–there aren’t a lot of options that don’t, per usual, put the burden on women to prevent sexual assault. This is hardly universal, of course, but a guy who’s thoughtful enough to download an anti-sexual-assault app probably isn’t the type who’s likely to end up committing rape anyway. And the guy who’s likely to commit rape probably isn’t going to think to download such an app before he goes out.

Read More…Read More…

Abby Wambach: New Coach for WPS magicJack

(Note: Yes, I’m still writing about the USWNT and WPS. If you’re into it and want to see the WPS Sky Blue this Saturday, tweet at me, I’m going!)

ABBY WAMBACH ABBY WAMBACH ABBY WAMBACH ABBY WAMBACH

That was the only thing I could say, think, tweet, or text to my mother when she scored her game-equalizing head goal against Brazil. Has anyone ever seen a better or more necessary goal in their life? In their entire life… of watching soccer? I used to be all about Hope Solo (and credit where credit is due, she’s still the best goalkeeper in the world), but after the WWC, I’m all about Abby Wambach. Abby Wambach Abby Wambach Abby Wambach Abby Wambach.

Wambach was and still is undoubtedly the talk of the USWNT in the Women’s World Cup. Her dramatic late game goals embodied the never die spirit of the team. She plays with such hunger. Such heart! And while Wambach is an animal for sure, she also has incredible composure that I swear I can feel through my TV screen. I love watching her do the small stuff: collecting the ball with confidence, passing to space, making the right runs, etc. She plays consistently and plays smart, and pulls through in the clutch. Her presence amps up the level of intensity and she inspires her teammates to play better. Her leadership is visibly undeniable on the field.

Now, she’s taking that leadership a step further. Upon returning from the frenzy of the WWC, Wambach’s transitioning her role from player to player-coach for the WPS’s magicJack for the remainder of the season. Seems there has been some controversy with magicJack owner/coach Dan Borislow. He’s bullied and intimidated players, making them feel threatened and uncomfortable to the point that he’s been banned from the sidelines. Sounds like an awful dude. Thankfully, he will no longer be coaching the magicJack, and when the team was searching for a qualified and capable coach, they looked to Wambach. Yes yes yes yes, I thought to myself.

An unrelated-but-sort-of-related story: When I read this news, I thought of my freshman year playing soccer at NYU. Obviously very different from Women’s Professional Soccer. However, we had ourselves an experience with a coach who was also an awful dude, and we banned him too. Our coach, Jon, made one of my teammates uncomfortable, and once she came forward, a few other players did too. I wasn’t involved and to this day don’t know the details, but he was accused of harassment right before the weekend of our final two conference matches, our most important games of the season. I remember it so well: We were in the airport to fly to Ohio, walking towards security, as we watched our captains tell him he couldn’t come with us to Case Western. He left, furious, without saying goodbye. So, we coached ourselves for that weekend. Our assistant coaches were there, but we weren’t playing for them. We were playing for each other. We were playing for the women who felt harassed and for our captains who stood up for them. We played together. And we played some of our best soccer, clinching the conference title.

Jon finished out the season with us, though most of us felt awkward around him. After that, he was fired.

When I look back on that incident, I don’t dwell on the fact that we had a maybe-inappropriate coach. I think about the respect I had for my teammates and captains and smile that we won on our own. Sure, that was just Division III soccer, but it’s not unlike the WPS League:

The league has precedent for a player-coach. U.S. captain and magicJack defender Rampone temporarily took the reins of Sky Blue FC in 2009 and led the team to the first WPS championship

Leaders win games! Of course there’s more to coaching that being an inspirational leader, but that goes a hell of a long way. Ultimately, players play best for people they respect- players or coaches. People respect the hell out of Abby Wambach. I predict she kills it.

…and after you’ve stopped with the bathing suit pictures, maybe stop having breasts.

The following may be triggering for some, as it concerns the physical abuse of young girls.

I can’t even. What the fuck.

I’m working on the afore-mentioned “white Jewish lady” post (more accurately: I appeared on Russian TV yesterday to discuss Israel/Palestine but am having a hard time embedding the video) but in the meantime, just saw this, and: What.The.Fuck.

Breast ironing sparks anger in Cameroon

Every morning before school, 9-year-old Terisia Techu would undergo a painful procedure. Her mother would take a burning hot pestle straight out of a fire and use it to press her breasts.

With tears in her eyes as she recalls what it was like, Terisia tells CNN that one day the pestle was so hot, it burned her, leaving a mark. Now 18, she is still traumatized.

Her mother, Grace, denies the incident. But she proudly demonstrates the method she used on her daughter for several weeks, saying the goal was to make her less desirable to boys — and stave off pregnancy.

A study found that one in four girls in Cameroon have been affected by the practice.

The U.S. State Department, in its 2010 human rights report on Cameroon, cited news reports and said breast ironing “victimized numerous girls in the country” and in some cases “resulted in burns, deformities, and psychological problems.”

There are more than 200 ethnic groups in Cameroon with different norms and customs. Breast ironing is practiced by all of them.

“To stave off pregnancy”… Just when you thought you knew everything there was to know about the ways in which the world tries to own and control our bodies, you get slapped upside the head with something new.

Breast ironing sparks anger in Cameroon.

Stop putting bathing suit pictures on Facebook, you trollops.

You are encouraging men to think of you like screwdrivers:

Something I never really wanted to post about, but feel I have to, because I don’t think that young women quite understand the problem.

Yesterday when I logged onto Facebook, I had several pictures of college co-eds in bathing suits, who are friends on Facebook, come up on my feed. In response, I posted the following on Facebook as my status:

“A note to young women on Facebook, from a guy who works with young men struggling with pornography…you might look good in your bathing suit, but if you were able to see yourself through 20 year-old male eyes, which are struggling to see you as a human and not an object, you would never post that pic. Just a thought.”

I’m sure that went over splendidly.

Here, he says, is the science behind the “men view you as an object” thing:

Researchers used brain scans to show that when straight men looked at pictures of women in bikinis, areas of the brain that normally light up in anticipation of using tools, like spanners and screwdrivers, were activated.

Scans of some of the men found that a part of the brain associated with empathy for other people’s emotions and wishes shut down after looking at the pictures.

Susan Fiske, a psychologist at Princeton University in New Jersey, said the changes in brain activity suggest sexy images can shift the way men perceive women, turning them from people to interact with, to objects to act upon.

Or it just means that a lot of straight dudes (and a lot of ladies, including yours truly) get excited about using power tools, and also get excited about women in bikinis. SHOCKING NEWS, I know.

But look, if dudes see women as not-quite-human, what you wear isn’t going to change that. And if it does change it, then dude has a problem. Why do you want to hang out with a guy who sees you as a “full human being” only so long as you’re wearing a loose floor-length skirt and an oversize turtleneck? At some point, if you become romantically involved with that dude, or if it gets hot out, he’s going to see you sans cover-alls. At some point, you may wear an outfit that he disapproves of, and he is definitely the kind of guy who thinks it’s his role to determine what is and isn’t acceptable when it comes to your sartorial choices. It will be very unfortunate when you wear shorts and he takes that as an opportunity to see you as “an object to be used” instead of a person with thoughts and needs.

Also? Objectifying women as a class and throughout advertising, art, film and all visuals and aesthetics — centering the male gaze, making the active “watcher” the man and the being-watched object the woman — is a big problem, and one that feminists are not unfamiliar with. Finding a particular person physically and sexually attractive, though — “objectifying” them insofar as they make your pants feel funny and you’re not necessarily wondering what their favorite hobbies are or what they think about the ongoing debt ceiling negotiations — is normal human behavior. We find other people attractive; sometimes we just like the view (heeeey James Franco). And many of us like to feel attractive, or be perceived as attractive. Many of us just don’t think it’s such a big deal to be in a bathing suit, and if there are 20-year-olds who can’t see a bikini pic on Facebook without eventually falling into a masturbation-induced shame-spiral, they should probably get off the internet because jesus, the internet is basically a tool for immediate delivery of pornography and funny animal videos.

And if there are really that many 20-year-old men who can’t help but see women as the equivalent of screwdrivers and struggle to see them as human beings — and to be clear, I am quite skeptical of the conclusions this author draws from the “science” he cites, but for the purposes of this argument let’s pretend he’s right — that is a big problem in the psychology of those particular 20-year-olds. Perhaps they should address it, rather than insisting that women everywhere adjust to suit their particular needs. I mean, I have a pretty big boner for dudes with beards, talent, women’s studies degrees and cats, but I’m not insisting that Bon Iver never make another record, you know?

Adoption as a Feminist Issue

There is some really excellent discussion happening in the comments of my last post, “Pregnancy: a Public Affair,” in which I wrote about how society allows and encourages people to make pregnant bodies their business, and how that has affected my thoughts on whether or not to ever become pregnant.

One topic that has come up in comments is the ethics and justice of adoption and adoption as a feminist issue. People seem pretty interested in discussing this topic, but it’s not directly related to the original post. So I thought I’d go ahead and open up a new post dedicated to adoption issues.

To start the discussion, I have some questions:

    How can or should we view adoption as a feminist issue? As a class, race, or disability issue? Whose rights stand to be compromised when adoption is or is not an available option?

    Does every child have a right to be raised by the people whose genetic material helped create them?

    Does every genetic parent have a right to raise their genetic children?

    Do people who are unable (though biology or circumstance), or do not desire, to conceive children have a right to raise children?

    If you believe adoption is problematic, what circumstances would make it less so?

Since this is a feminist blog, let’s try to make this a critical discussion, rather than simply an airing of personal grievances. (Personal experiences are the foundation of feminism, so I encourage sharing them. But I ask that in this thread we use them to engage with others, build understanding, and provide insight.) And as always, please be respectful!

ETA: Links and resources are greatly appreciated. However, your comment will get mistaken for spam (by the spam filter, which is not human) if it contains 5 or more links. I may eventually fish it out of the spam filter and make sure it gets published, but you might want to limit yourself to 4 or fewer links per comment, just to be safe.

Who run the world? Men, actually.

Whenever I slip into Starbucks for a little iced Joe these days, there she is: Beyonce.

For the moment, I won’t get into the outfit she sports on the cover of her latest work, nor the disturbing fact that it seems every album Beyonce puts out is adorned with an ever-lighter version of her genuinely lovely self.

No, I want to talk about her music, but there’s still one more caveat: As a 46 year old suburban mother who likes loud rock n’ roll, I am not nor have I ever been Beyonce’s target audience.

Yet when an artist sells majillion and twelve copies of everything she produces over the course of more than a decade; is chosen to serenade a freshly elected President and his first lady; shills for non-musical products that range from make-up to electronics; and is celebrated and/or dissected in every media outlet known to humanity — I’m kind of in her audience, whether I’m the target or not.

Beyonce’s got a hella voice, that much is for sure and for certain, and I understand she’s got a hella business sense, a fact which I can certainly respect and enjoy in a young woman. I appreciate that she holds on to her curves in an era of rail-thin female performers, and lord knows she puts out music to which the toe simply begs to tap. Beyonce is a force with which to be reckoned.

But for all her business sense, for all her cross-market branding, for all her grab-your-sexuality-and-own-it bravado — I don’t think she’s ever represented anything particularly new. On the contrary: At her most interesting, Beyonce is the best of all that has gone before her and/or current pop culture, and her lyrics are either run-of-the-mill ordinary — or down right reactionary.

Take for instance “Single Ladies” — now there’s a song with a hook that can go for miles and miles. And fun to dance to? You betcha. But what’s it about? It’s about how if a man likes you — or, indeed, your body? He should damn well marry you:

Cause if you liked it then you should have put a ring on it
If you liked it then you should’ve put a ring on it
Don’t be mad once you see that he want it
If you liked it then you should’ve put a ring on it

Seriously? Beyonce, what you’re saying here is: “You shouldn’t have tried to keep the cow for free once you’d had the milk.” I kind of thought we’d gotten past that.

Then there’s the most recent single, “The Best Thing I Never Had.”

There was a time
I thought, that you did everything right
No lies, no wrong
Boy I, must’ve been outta my mind
So when I think of the time that I almost loved you
You showed your ass and I saw the real you

Honestly? All these years, all that work with the best and the brightest, and you’re still singing what every single female pop artist has sung throughout the history of popular music? And throwing in the word “ass” for, I don’t know, street cred? Just: Why? Why be Beyonce, of all people, and sing words that a million other people have sung before?

But the song that really got me thinking about Beyonce’s essentially reactionary nature as an artist was “Run the World (Girls),” a song which purports to be about girl power, but is in fact absolutely nothing but a rehash of centuries of “the power behind the throne” thinking.

The music is martial, pounding, a mix of styles that includes accents from all around the world, the official video a kind of a Mad-Max-meets-Victoria’s-Secret aesthetic — and bottom line, before you even get past the title, a nearly-30 year old adult is referring to the world’s women as “girls.”

Who run the world? Girls! [x4]
Who run this motha? Girls! [x4]
Who run the world? Girls! [x4]

… I’m just playing, come here baby
Hope you still like me, If you hate me
My persuasion can build a nation
Endless power, with our love we can devour
You’ll do anything for me

First of all, as any businesswoman who has made her fortune in the entertainment business knows: Women (or, if you insist, “girls”) most certainly do not run the world. To the extent that a woman’s “persuasion can build a nation,” and/or that “endless power, with our love we can devour/ You’ll do anything for me” — you’re not talking about running things. You’re talking about slotting yourself expressly into a male-dominated structure and at the very most, subverting it by using that structure for your own purposes.

That’s not running things. That’s making the best of a bad lot. That’s being — if you happen to be one of the few women anywhere near the throne — the power behind the throne, and singing the praises of being stuck back there.

Normally, I would merely be annoyed by someone selling me old shit in a shiny, new-ish package. I might make a point of turning the particular pop culture bag-of-shit into a teachable moment for my kids, but I wouldn’t go to the trouble of writing an entire post about one artist — but Beyonce is not, in any measurable sense, “one artist.”

Beyonce is a pop culture phenomenon who plays a central role in setting the tone for the America in which my boy and girl are growing up. When people of that stature not only sing what amounts to pablum, but are also selling the twin soul-crushers of “the price of a woman’s body is a wedding ring” and “the power of my coochie runs the world,” I feel a rather powerful need to point it out for what it is: bullshit. And dangerous, damaging bullshit at that.

I am blogger! Hear me squeak!

Who the heck am I and why am I blogging here this week? Click here, and all will be revealed.

The Different Types of Feminists

Image of a woman with the words, "I'm a feminist, now what?"

Wow, what cool new arguments. I definitely want to be a Regular-Person Feminist — you know, the type who doesn’t ever talk about feminism, and definitely won’t hurt your feelings by challenging anything you say. Unfortunately, I appear to be some hybrid of the Joyless Psuedo-Intellectual Feminist and the Slutty Feminist (mostly because I totally identify with Karen Walker). Who knows how that even works.

Plantation weddings, and ignoring the past

Now this shit is just creepy.

Flying your family and friends down for a destination wedding in South Africa celebrating “colonial Africa” and staffed by expressionless, befezzed Africans is creepy. I’m the kind of person who likes to give the benefit of the doubt, so I’m going to say that this couple was just painfully, criminally ignorant, because the thought that they were fully aware of the implications and just thought it was charming could make me lose my faith in humanity.

GOOD’s Amanda Hess feels the same way. But then she brings it back to home soil–the soil, she says, “of America’s own historical horrors.” It’s plantation weddings that have her back up. Her working definition for plantation wedding appears to be “a wedding that takes place on a plantation”; she seems to place one couple who debated having Confederate flags at their reception on a level with another couple whose wedding featured origami table decorations and a Legend of Zelda cake, and whose only apparent sin was getting married on a plantation.

And that’s pretty much where she loses me. She’d have a valid argument if slavery was America’s only historical horror, or if plantations were the only land it happened on. But they aren’t–they’re just the only ones that have appeared in a major motion picture starring Vivien Leigh and Clark Gable. This is the house that slavery built, not just in the South but throughout much of the U.S., and any town or city dating back before about 1860 has a history that almost certainly will involve slave labor. Being conscious of the racist history of the South takes more work than finding a wide, tree-lined driveway and pointing an angry finger.

In the South, if you pass on the plantation and instead choose to get married in a church, and that church was built before 1860, it almost certainly was built with slave labor. If you decide to go the JOP route and get married in a historical courthouse, you’re probably walking in a place that not only was built by slaves but also was a place to buy and sell them. Those romantic bridges of Madison County are lovely for photos–and, in many cases, built by slaves. If you’ve studied at UNC Chapel Hill or visited the White House or the U.S. Capitol or, hell, much of New York City, you’ve almost certainly traveled on at least one street cleared by slaves, a historic building built by slaves, or a property built on top of the rubble of slave labor. And they’re not all conveniently marked with a wraparound porch.

Read More…Read More…