Note: I started this post awhile back and it got set to the side during the blog vacation.
Everyone should read Jill’s rant against the supposed failure of feminism for dictating the kind of man all women want. The survey that asserts so was done by none other than Dodge Trucks. If you don’t remember, Dodge was under serious fire last year for putting on a so-called lingerie bowl during the Superbowl halftime last year.
After the brouhaha caused Dodge to incur extreme modifications to the original Lingerie Bowl, including outfits that provided real coverage and the addition of safety pads, a Dodge executive was quoted as saying,
“We definitely skewed it male, but that is fine,” [marketing director Joe] Eberhardt said. “If all of a sudden we lose female Caravan buyers, it would be an issue. I don’t think we have.”
The Lingerie Bowl turned out the be a disappointment for most who watched it. Something about the sports bras and uni-boob, I suspect.
But it’s Daimler-Chrysler’s assumption that women don’t pay attention to this kind of marketing strategy and draw connections between the trucks they’re trying to sell to men and the minivans they sell to the mythical soccer mom. I presume plenty of non-feminist women are just as put off by the Manly Man routine as feminists are put off by the normative gender roles that Dodge uses to market its products.
Even I, a straight feminist, have said that I like masculine men. I just don’t like the macho and arrogant sort of masculine men. Like Mr. Eberhardt.
Taking a cue from Jill:
The Ideal Man as Determined By Women Surveyed By Dodge Trucks
vs.
The Ideal Man According To Lauren
| Sixty-two percent of women surveyed said they would rather see a man’s hands rough and working hard than well-manicured. |
Manicures aside, one hundred percent of Feministes agree that if your fingernails are snagged enough to put a gash in my face, I may require you to trim them if you ever want to get close to me again. Ditto on toenails. |
| Ninety-two percent of women said dependability is a desirable characteristic in an ideal mate. |
One hundred percent of Feministes think that dependability is a must for any inerpersonal relationship, be it sexual, platonic, or any other arrangement. Any person who says otherwise has issues with being treated like a respectful human being. What kind of stupid survey is this? |
| Seventy-five percent of women said their ideal man buys his grooming products at a grocery store or drugstore, not a salon. |
One hundred percent of Feministes agree that taking one’s love-bunny to the health food store for a personal shopping expedition is way more exciting than hitting the deodorant aisle at Walgreen’s. Plus, the love-bunny will smell way better. Naturally! |
| Forty-one percent of women said their ideal man spends his time watching sports. |
I have a rule here. I don’t date anyone who watches sports unless he also plays them. Currently. Not back when he was in high school. Ditto for home improvement shows. Vicarious living is okay to a point, but the trend will not be repeated in my house.
This is a silly point, anyway. I only date snobbish nerds, the kind who would pick up a good book over the TV remote or Playstation controller. |
| Ninety percent of women said they prefer low-maintenance, easygoing guys. |
Christ, who doesn’t prefer a low-maintenance, easygoing partner? Most men would answer the same way, that is, unless they’re looking for Hiltonites for girlfriends. And in that case, we’re not interested anyway. |
| Seventy-two percent of women said their ideal man spends his free time doing home-improvement projects. |
Back up, yo. That’s my hammer. Get your own damn toolbox. |
The most insipid thing about the article covering this Ultimate Man story is the title: Hold the quiche: Manly men are back. Feministing pointed out that a member of the anti-feminist Independent Women’s Forum tried to use the results of this totally unscientific, marketing-driven survey to prove that feminism is on the outs:
“It just shows that there are some things that you can’t change and that, while feminism for a long time has been pushing us towards androgyny with little girls with trucks and guys with dolls, women tend to have feministic traits and guys the opposite,” says Carrie Lukas, director of policy with the Independent Women’s Forum. “If anything, it shows what feminism hasn’t been able to accomplish.”
Sorry, Ms. Lukas (Do you mind if I call you Ms., darling?), but most feminists aren’t aiming for prescriptive androgyny as much as we are working against normative prescriptions of gender roles. Feministic traits. That’s funny. Lukas should quit the shill chamber and look for a comedy gig.
But back to partnerships. One has to have standards. I have others as well. In no particular order:
- No extended adolesences. I don’t mind occasional trips down Teen Beat Ave., but if the only thing you can talk about is what AnkleByte33 said during your last 13-hour Halo stint, I’m out the door. That’s just fucking boring.
- Passable credit, please. I haven’t busted my ass over the last few years to keep my credit good just so you can drag it down with the charges you ran up at Toys R Us buying fancy Lego sets so your geek friends would think it’s cool that you built a Star Wars aircraft carrier-looking thing for the low, low price of $129.99. Read a book lately?
- Steadily employed.
- Does not buy into Dodge-sponsored gender tripe.
- Left side of the aisle. I can’t even imagine what it would be like to sleep with a Republican. In the same bed. *shudder*
- Has principles and standards of his own and, omigod, sticks to them.
- Has goals. Goals, people! And by goals I don’t mean, “Hopes to eventually become a rock star/professional skater/artist/etc. by putting the shoulder to the grindstone, i.e. spending all free time pot smoking, Texas Justice watching, and memorizing lines from Napoleon Dynamite.”
- Prefers a partnership over a dictatorship (as long as he is willing to admit that not only am I always right, but I fight dirty).
Excuse me, is my slip showing? No wonder it’s difficult to date these days.
Related Reading: Pandamanda’s Defense of the Blue Collar Man.