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A Crappy Weekend, Literally

My review of the Jensen experience is forthcoming. It was disappointing, to say the very least, and one of those youthful experiences in which you slay your own idols with swords and flame.

My travelmates and I didn’t stay in Yellow Springs as originally planned. The town is the size of my toenail: an adorable town with a charming shopping district, but without a bar open past 11pm and no visible hotel accommodations. After the talk, we stopped for food and got back into the car. I was in an iffy mood when I got home, still fuming over the Jensen talk and wanting back out of the house so my Friday night wouldn’t be a total waste. When I walked in the door, I noticed that Pablo had thrown up.

This isn’t unusual. Pablo usually has his Saturday hairball. No matter the hairball formula foods I feed him, no matter the other hairball accommodations I have made, no matter the nightly brushing sessions, Pablo hacks something up every Saturday like clockwork. I figured he was early this time.

Since I got Pablo I have found that he has several very odd behaviors, the first being this hairball thing, and the second being his fear of dogs. When I got Pablo from the pound, they had no previous information on him. It was obvious he had been a housecat, well taken care of, and socialized properly. Unfortunately he was declawed in the front, had fleas, and apparently caught a parasite in the shelter. I did the expected and treated what I could and ever since have had a very healthy, lovable cat.

Nonetheless, I went back out Friday night after cleaning up P-Lo’s mess. I collapsed in bed when I got home, had a decent night of sleep, and woke up that morning to make myself some tea. And I stepped in cat puke. I grumbled to myself, went back to the bathroom and washed my foot, and headed back into the kitchen. On the way, I passed two more piles of puke. There was another in the kitchen and two more in the den. Pablo seemed as though he was in a good mood, so I filled his dish as usual, not thinking in my morning stupor. He ate a few bites and immediately threw up again. My first thought was that he had finally eaten the wrong plant or a bit of yarn. I called the emergency vet clinic and got us in there ASAP.

Pablo, like most cats, doesn’t much like the cat carrier. He lays in the carrier in the backseat mournfully lowing like a cow as though I’m taking his furry ass back to the pound. To make matters worse, there was a dog in the waiting room, a harmless geriatric spaniel in for glaucoma and a tumor.

The stress of a car ride, the cat carrier, and the unexpected presence of dogs in the waiting room got another kind of strange reaction from Pablo, one that should be written in Sharpie on the list above: when Pablo sees a dog he loses all control of his bowels.

After a long wait we got into the exam room. I took Pablo out of the carrier and the tech, the cat and I were immediately covered in cat shit. But Pablo hadn’t stopped. He continued to shit all over me and the tech. Everywhere. It smelled so bad that I had to step into the hallway to pace around in fresh air. Pablo lowed inside the examination room, insulted that I had left him and embarassed that he had crapped all over himself and the cat carrier.

If there was a good side to this story, kind of, it is finding out that the routine worming Pablo got didn’t do a thing. Not only does he have tapeworm, but the parasite that he had when I got him from the pound never went away. They are doing more blood work and poo work to find causes and solutions to this mess, and in the meantime, as soon as anything hits Pablo’s stomach he vomits. I can’t feed him until tomorrow afternoon.

He continues to behave as though he is in a good mood (at least after recovering from his bath) and is active, cheerful, and healthy-looking, which makes me think about the $90 I spent on P-Lo’s bill today, the potential of having to pay for an X-ray if he did ingest something, and how all my money saving efforts from this month were effectively flushed down the tubes.

Pablo had better be glad I love him so damn much. He has been awfully affectionate since his bath. He lay in my lap all evening and, in lieu of purring, snorted like a pig.

Of course it could be his raging, unfulfilled appetite.


15 thoughts on A Crappy Weekend, Literally

  1. What a crappy awakening for you!

    I’ve never had a cat that has gotten a tapeworm, or any other types of worms, or other parasites, so I have no idea what you’ll have to do for Pablo. I hope they figure it out quickly and with little expense to you.

    Pets are wonderful.

  2. ouch. sorry to hear about Pablo, and about the moeny, and Derrick Jensen. I’ve never seen him – only read one of his books – I’ll be really interested to read your take on him. (Jensen, not Pablo. Pablo’s writing is always mesmerizing, of course.)

  3. you have my sympathies…

    i was once trapped driving a car on the highway with a manic cat suffering from explosive poop & projectile vomit….

    ah, the memories.

  4. Our kitty had worms when we got her, and it took a few tries to get rid of them. The trouble is, they’re carried by fleas…and the little worm eggs get into your carpet/bedding and in the cat’s fur, going back into his stomach when he grooms.

    We had to do a couple of rounds of flea-extermination in our apt to kill them all, and bathe her a couple of times before she got better.

    Hope all is well with him though. Good luck!

  5. which makes me think about the $90 I spent on P-Lo’s bill today

    Oh, been there. I wish I could offer you something besides sympathy and hopes that the week only looks up from here on out.

    I wonder why the prior parasite treatment didn’t take? That’s so wrong.

  6. I’m sorry the Jensen talk wasn’t what you expected. You have to understand, however, that he has two main talks that correlate directly to his work. He does these talks like 7 times a month – it would literally be impossible for him to give a different talk for each audience. He isn’t an improv comedian; he’s a writer and an activist who is very enthusiastic about his work and eager to spread it across the country.
    I’m not trying to be crass, I really respect the work you do here, but I certainly didn’t drive 3 1/2 hours to be entertained and then go bar hopping – I could do that anywhere, at any time. I went to Yellow Springs to meet someone that has deeply influenced the way I think and view the world around me. To me, it was worth the trip.

  7. Hm.

    To be honest, I kinda agree with Kyle. Unless he said something or did something particular that disappointed you, I can’t imagine why the weekend would be a complete bust.

    I’m not really a Jensen fanboy, either. I didn’t have a blast listening to the talk, but I did enjoy meeting him briefly and discussing stuff with him. He’s a little bit shy and eccentric in person, but his writing is absolutely phenomenal.

    I’d caution you not to forget that just because the weekend wasn’t ideal.

    So, why was it such a bum deal?

  8. Poor Pablo. I once had a cat who wouldn’t drink, and was getting rapidly dehydrated. I took him into the vet, who injected him with fluid under his skin, to get him hydrated quickly. Apparently, cats have such loose skin this works quickly. Anyway, they kept him all day under observation, gave him a laxative, gave him a little more fluid, and he was back to his normal kitty self.

    When we got home, I discovered the problem….he shat out an entire venetian blind cord….the whole fucking thing! And he had a hard time eliminating it, so he ran around the house trying to catch the cord on something and pull it out of his butt! And there was me, chasing after him, saying “No! Got-damn it!! Stop!!” because there was a pile of cat turds at the end of a bunch of wadded-up blind cord, and he was spreading the cat shit (smearing it, actually) throughout the house. All over my freshly-polished hardwood floors. I was so fucking mad…..it took me all weekend to do those floors!!!

    I caught him. Pulled the kitty cord. “MEOW!!” Then no more problem; he had an appetite and a thirst again. And I got to clean and spot-polish a significant amount of flooring, bitching at my cat all the way. And yeah, I had to replace the blind too. It was permanently in the “down” position since Djingo decided to eat the cord like it was spaghetti.

  9. I really respect the work you do here, but I certainly didn’t drive 3 1/2 hours to be entertained and then go bar hopping – I could do that anywhere, at any time. I went to Yellow Springs to meet someone that has deeply influenced the way I think and view the world around me.

    yo Kyle- if you respect the work Ms. Lauren does here then why make thhe assumption that she showed up for booze & jollies while you showed up for more serious reasons. that’s not respect. it’s arrogance.

    speaking of arrogance, i went to go see Jensen awhile ago, because i heard great things about his books. still haven’t read any of them because i found him to be a pretentious, self-indulgent & arrogant bore with little of anything original to say. perhaps this is unfair. perhaps he was in a bad mood, or not feeling enthusiastic thhe night i saw him. and, true, not everyone is meant to be a public speaker… Ms. Lauren certainly has spoken highly of him in the past. perhaps i should give him another try.

    anyways anyhoo, Ms Lauren, was it all about the bar-hopping, or what? or was there something perhaps more substantial to your disappointment? i’m assuming so, given the swords & flames & such.

    do tell.

  10. Jam-

    I think you’re projecting on that whole arrogance bit. Kyle isn’t making what I would call assumptions. After all, he was there. There’s all kinda context here that he has access to.

    That said, he does appreciate Lauren’s work. (I’m his roomie, not a spokesperson.) Blessed are the wounds of a friend.

    I can understand what he’s saying: as this is a semi-public forum, he and I–both fans of Jensen’s books, not as much of his talks–feel inclined to treat unfounded criticism of his work with caution. I, for one, think it’s important that people not hear his name and shut off.

    Hence the request for clarification… Kyle and I went to Yellow Springs for the same function and had very different experiences than Lauren. Isn’t it worth it to ask why?

    To respond to the claim that Jensen is pretentious in person, I sensed a little bit of that, to be honest. It seems defensive, though, and it doesn’t change the fact that his writing is phenomenal. I sooke with him for five minutes or so and, like so many folks who aren’t socially adept, once I warmed up to him I found him to be quite personable. Frankly, I have the same problem.

    Though Kyle may seem a little harsh in his response, I think he’s just trying to avoid being a “yes man” to Lauren’s opinions, something I know she respects. Speaking for myself, the evening was quite enjoyable, if a bit predictable.

  11. I appreciate a non-yes-man, but the “3 1/2 hours to be entertained and then go bar hopping” is irritating. I wanted a nice weekend out but had my expectations dashed for many reasons, not just Jensen, which I thought was apparent in this post.

  12. I’ve never heard of Derrick Jensen. I do hope Pablo is ok. My orange cat used to have really bad dioreaha (sp?) and some vomiting, until I shifted it onto IAMS or Eukanuba. Now its fine and also its fur looks shinier. I now feed them nothing else except water, no milk, no meat, no crap wet canned food, no bones. It costs more but I feed them much much less each day and they look as healthy as a teenager drinking beer.

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