In defense of the sanctimonious women's studies set || First feminist blog on the internet

The Person My Dog Thinks I Am

Ballastexistenz has a post up about the difference between content and style, as it were:

(You should go read the whole thing; I’m quoting chapters in isolation out of a long post.)

At any rate, one of the false overlays it’s possible to read into what I am saying, is a false overlay of harshness. The interesting, and dismaying, thing that I have found, is that a person can say genuinely harsh things (like wanting their child dead), but do so in a way that is covered over with a lot of particular language triggers, and be considered a nice person in the process.

I don’t use those language triggers. I don’t know if there is a word for those things in linguistics. What they appear like to me, is content that is there for the sole purpose of conveying a specific social impression of the person. That impression is supposed to be that the person is kind, compassionate, caring, nice, sweet, good-hearted, etc. What surprises me is that people read those signals more strongly than they read what is being said. To me, those signals stand out in stark contrast to what is being said, much of the time.

To borrow a technique from my EYEBALLS post, in the more extreme version of this, it must look to a lot of people like saying:

I AM A NICE PERSON I want I AM A SWEET-NATURED PERSON to I AM A NICE PERSON kill I WOULD NEVER HURT ANYBODY certain kinds of people I AM A NICE PERSON and have I WOULD NEVER HURT ANYBODY seriously I AM A NICE PERSON thought I AM A SWEET-NATURED PERSON about I AM A NICE PERSON doing I WOULD NEVER HURT ANYBODY exactly that. I AM A NICE PERSON. I AM A GOOD PERSON. I WOULD NEVER HURT ANYBODY. I AM A NICE PERSON. I AM A NICE PERSON.

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I Love American Chopper

Yes, it’s a testosterone-soaked show with plenty of male posturing, but I love the dysfunctional family dynamic, and how the tough biker guys all melt (and behave themselves) when Grandma is involved. Grandma, I was surprised to learn, is actually Paul Sr.’s stepmother.

And, you know, Vinnie. He’s so long-suffering. And cute.

I’m watching an episode now which is a repeat, but it’s one of the FANtasy bike shows — they had people send in tapes arguing for why they should win one of four custom-made bikes for fans. In some respects, it was very “Queen for a Day,” with the winners telling their hard-luck stories. We had a guy who loved bikes and loved being in the Army, but had to give up the Army when his mother got sick, and took a job that let him be near her but didn’t pay him enough to buy a bike. We had a strangely affectless woman who’d beaten drug addiction and built her own business and admonished the crew for never having built a bike for a woman (well, they did, but given that it was for Paul Sr.’s ex-girlfriend, so they don’t mention it anymore). And we had a guy (who had the greatest reaction when they showed up at his house) who had sold his Harley chopper to help pay for his mother’s cancer treatment, and had promised his mother he’d rebuild it.

But the episode I’m watching tonight is the episode where they build a custom trike for a fan in California who’s a paraplegic. Bryan, the fan, had been a baseball star in high school and had been recruited by the Astros, but turned them down for a scholarship. He got into a car wreck, though, and fractured his T-3 and T-4 vertebrae. He’s customized several cars to not only let him use his arms for the controls, but he’s also made them appear as “normal” as possible — so rather than a customized minivan, he’s got something that looks like an El Camino that opens up and scoops up his chair after he’s gotten in.

What was very cool about this episode was that, even though the OCC crew talked a bit about how Bryan had overcome so much, had a positive attitude, blah, blah, that was mostly in the face-to-face interviews and voiceovers, which always seem a little rote and trite and potentially scripted; when the builders were actually talking about the trike as they were working on it, and how they had to really think about the way that Bryan would use it, they were all just plain excited about doing their first trike (which involves entirely different engineering and controls than your basic bike, and that’s before you get into the all-hand-controls and needing a reverse gear and the like). Vinnie said several times that he wanted to ride it himself, and he spent a hell of a lot of time and thought getting the wiring and controls right. Details had to be carefully considered, like the height and angle of the seat, as well as the fact that the placement of the exhaustwas very important because if Bryan’s leg hit the exhaust pipe, he could seriously burn himself because he wouldn’t feel it. The paint guy loved the spine motif Bryan had come up with, and found himself consulting anatomy textbooks.

It was really great to see a show take on a disability issue and, while not being entirely free of “oh, wow, isn’t it amazing how much you’ve overcome” kind of stuff, treat it as a problem/challenge that can be incredibly satisfying to take on rather than an annoyance or a gift from the gods. You really got the sense that they got more out of this build than they did for the other FANtasy bike builds for able-bodied fans.